From 280f91b15fb582f1b44f4cfd2645a3ceca11b838 Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001 From: Shlomi Fish Date: Mon, 25 Jun 2018 18:19:05 +0300 Subject: [PATCH] continue applying the debian datfiles.diff --- fortune-mod/datfiles/debian | 328 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 1 file changed, 328 insertions(+) diff --git a/fortune-mod/datfiles/debian b/fortune-mod/datfiles/debian index 56b0217..6d4aaa1 100644 --- a/fortune-mod/datfiles/debian +++ b/fortune-mod/datfiles/debian @@ -76,3 +76,331 @@ rename the distro from "stable" to "wobbly". this wasn't chicken. -- in #debian-devel % +I was attacked by dselect as a small child and have since avoided +debian. + -- Andrew Morton +% +* joeyh installs debian using only his big toe, for a change of pace + -- in #debian-boot +% +* liiwi takes the whip and eyes pasc +< pasc> ohh!!! kinky! +< pasc> how convenient, I was just about to call in sick at work ;-) + -- in #debian-devel +% + Turns out that grep returns error code 1 when there are no matches. + I KNEW that. Why did it take me half an hour? + -- Seen on #Debian +% +It's simply unbelievable how much energy and creativity people have +invested into creating contradictory, bogus and stupid licenses... + -- - Sven Rudolph about licences in debian/non-free. +% + partycle: I seriously do need a vacation from this + package. I actually had a DREAM about introducing a + stupid new bug into xbase-preinst last night. That's a + Bad Sign. + -- Seen on #Debian shortly before the release of Debian 2.0 +% + Looks like the channel is back to normal :) + You mean it's not scrolling faster than anyone can read? :) + -- Seen on #Debian after the release of Debian 2.0 +% +Just to expand on what Ross said, it is undoubtedly too much to expect +of any distribution that it automatically detect whether or not the +person installing it can read simple English directions, and if he +can't, proceed without his input. That way lies madness. + -- Shawn McMahon on debian-curiosa@l.d.o +% + dackel: in general the *only* way to use a computer program + is to execute it. have you *ever* known a system utility whose + documentation recommended either deleting it, or throwing it + at a farm animal? + zedboy: Ummm... yes + dackel: install the manpages package. it should be there + already tho. + dackel: example of such a bovine utility? +* greycat wants a video of dackel throwing /usr/bin/file at a cow +% + Joy: thanks, joy + elmo: that's redundant, elmo + doogie: go play in traffic + ah, the elmo we know and love +% + joy/elmo: why can't the same ip be used? was this fire so + great that it burned the ip address? +% + Nothing says "I enjoy living with you" like the gift of + 3rd degree burns... + except, of course, turning his bed into a trebuchet. + That much effort must mean some sort of affection. +% + Anyone here knowledgable in matters of water fowl? If you + walk through a park, and a goose starts following you... and + ends up following you more than half a mile until you reach + your car... at 11pm. Is the goose rabid or something? +% + the problem with the 'go find a real girl' admonition is + that so few of them actually have naked transformation + sequences + Dude, my girlfriend changes like four times a day +% + If Unicron had a tech spec card, his motto would be "That + which does not become part of the One shall become Void." + which is sort of a grand-scale, apocalyptic version of "I + am what I eat." :) +% + udp - universal dropping of an pigeon +% + I've always wanted to have a web site with a big picture of a carrot on +it +% + Bdale is a contraction of Barksdale. + Hm. It's definItely not something I'll ever remember. + Mind if I call you Wensleydale instead? +% + and those that say: fibre cables have a minimum bend radius and + pull tension? bah! *yank* + IT'S FIBER YOU FREAKS :P + culus, you hoser, it's fibre. am I gonna have to come over the + mountains and give you a wedgie? +% + Joy: Lets fork cat! :) + Joy: imagine a big pitchfork and a dead kitten on top of + it.. with blood running down.. +% + Damnit. I've got a month to write a paper. This involves + actually writing the chunks of code I'm going to be talking + about. + find a bunch of students and give it to them as an exercise + asuffield: I'm surrounded by a bunch of students. Last time I + let them touch code, I came back and found they'd rewritten + all the C++ code in C and all the C code in C++ + mwahaha + AND BROKE THE BUILD +% + what I like about Manoj is his desire for simple and small + solutions. like EMACS. or dvt. + well, dvt was _supposed_ to be simple + it only took 2 weeks to write + Manoj: It requires a *diagram* to explain what each part does. +% + ok, I will not marry Jo-Con-El's cow. +% + penis jokes are okay in mixed company. VMS is NOT!!! +% + ltd: Fine, go through life just pointing and grunting at + what you mean. Works for Mac users. +% +revision 1.17.2.7 +date: 2001/05/31 21:32:44; author: branden; state: Exp; lines: +1 -1 +ARRRRGH!! GOT THE G** D*** SENSE OF A F******* TEST BACKWARDS! +% + Overfiend's First Law of Package Quality: If the + maintainer likes to spell part or all of his name in + CAPS, the package will suck. +% + Intel. Bringing you the cutting-edge technology of 1979 + for 22 years now. +% + the key to proper French pronunciation is to pull the + corners of your mouth down as far as they can possibly go, + and then groan like you're constipated + you'll really nail the vowel sounds that way +% +<-- Overfiend has quit ("venturing forth to destroy strange new + worlds, and eat life and new civilizations") +% + the kind of landscape that laughs at "AWD" vehicles and + sends them tumbling into ravines +% + Joy: Hey, I'm an asshole. Assholes emit odious gas. + That's what we do. +% + as aj would say, waiting always works + either what you want happens, or you die and cannot be + perturbed anymore + the trouble with this philosophy is that aj sincerely + believes it +% +* doogie is turning into manoj + doogie: eventually, we all turn into Manoj + Manoj is Debian's iron + ultimately, we all decay to Manoj +% + but look at the French. You could spell every word in + their language phonetically using only about 6 letters + 4 consonants and 2 vowels + c, f, r, l. And the vowels? Well, one is the sound you + make when you have constipation; the other when you have + diarrhea + what do you expect from that diet of snails and frogs? +% +X-Manoj-Position-Advisory: Please note that Manoj Srivastava likely doubts + any facts posited and opposes any conclusions reached in this message. + + -- Seen in the headers of a mail from Branden Robinson +% + home is where the highest bandwidth is +% + no more perl ... it's depressing ... + i think perl and i need some time from each other + we made beautiful music together about a year ago ... + but times have change, we changed .. +% + I can usually supress the feelings that tell me to crash + tackle a girl into the bushes +% + bwah, vodka in my mouse +% + in a stunning new move I actually tested this upload +% + 3990 N Apr 15 Cute Girlfriend ( 45) Erotic Amateur Girlfriends + I wasn't aware you had professional girlfriends as well +% +However, my enthusiasm for the modular tree is tempered by some parts of +it not existing. + -- Daniel Stone on debian-{x,devel}, commenting on the + future of X +% +Does she think we just want to sit around painting debian swirls on our +toenails? + -- Erinn Clark, referring to the Debian-women project +% +modconf (0.2.37) stable unstable; urgency=medium + [...] + * Eduard Bloch: + - fixed Makefile broken Marcin Owsiany a while ago. The default manpage + has been overwritten with the polish translation. I still wonder why + nobody noticed this before. Closes: #117474 + [...] + -- Eduard Bloch Sun, 28 Oct 2001 12:53:27 +0100 +% +<|ryan|> I don't use deb + u poor man + netgod: heh + apt-get install task-p0rn +% +(It is an old Debian tradition to leave at least twice a year ...) + -- Sven Rudolph +% + gorgo: *lol* + joey: what's so funny? :) + shh, joey is losing all sanity from lack of sleep + 'yes joey, very funny' + Humor him :> + -- Seen on #Debian +% +* SynrG notes that the number of configuration questions to answer in sendmail + is NON-TRIVIAL + -- Seen on #Debian +% +* JHM wonders what Joey did to earn "I'd just like to say, for the record, + that Joey rules." + -- Seen on #Debian +% +Do people like check the Debian website every 5 minutes to check it hasn't +morphed into another one? Not that I'm one to talk, but some people seriously +need to get a life. + -- james on #Debian +% +* james would be more impressed if netgod's magic powers could stop the + splits in the first place... +* netgod notes debian developers are notoriously hard to impress + -- Seen on #Debian +% + * In anticipation of 2.10.02 release, updated to patchlevel + +ircu2.10.01+.config6-7.config7-8.lgline3.iwho.limit.glibc.motdcache2. + trace.whois1-2.config8-9.statsw.sprintf2-3.msgtree2.memleak1-2+. + msgtree2-3.gline8-9.gline9-10.invite2.rbr.stats.numclients. + whisper.whisper1-2.stats1-2.nokick1-2.chroot.config9-11.snomask7-8. + limi+t1-3.userip1-3.userip3-4.config11-12.config12-13.umode2-3. + akillsbt.who4-5.kn.kn1-2.freebsdcore2.msgtree3-5.y2k.glibc1-2. + rmfunc.msgf+lags2.who5-6.nickchange2.glibc2-3.modeless3 + -- From the annoucement of ircd 2.10.01-3 for Debian GNU/Linux +% +* Joey should not write changelog entries at 5:30am + * DFSC Free cgi library + What's that? DFSC? + Debian Free Software mroooooCows + -- Seen on #Debian +% + abuse me. I'm so lame I sent a bug report to debian-devel-changes + -- Seen on #Debian +% + eat Depends: cook | eat-out. + But eat-out is non-free so that's out. + And cook Recommends: clean-pans. + -- Seen on #Debian +% +You will not censor me through bug terrorism. + -- James Troup +% + Thinking is dangerous. It leads to ideas. + -- Seen on #Debian +% + Are we going to make an emacs out of apt? + APT - Debian in a program. It even does your laundry + -- Seen on #Debian +% +Debian is like Suse with yast turned off, just better. :) + -- Goswin Brederlow +% +Charles Briscoe-Smith : + After all, the gzip package is called `gzip', not `libz-bin'... + +James Troup : + Uh, probably because the gzip binary doesn't come from the + non-existent libz package or the existent zlib package. + -- debian-bugs-dist +% + Lemme make sure I'm not wasting time here... bcwhite will remove + pkgs that havent been fixed that have outstanding bugs of severity + "important". True or false? + jim: "important" or higher. True. + Then we're about to lose ftp.debian.org and dpkg :) +* netgod will miss dpkg -- it was occasionally useful + We still have rpm.... + -- Seen on #Debian +% +Being overloaded is the sign of a true Debian maintainer. + -- JHM on #Debian +% +I am amazed that no-one's based a commercial distribution on Debian +yet - it is by far the most solid UNIX-like OS I've ever installed, +and I've played with HP/UX, Solaris, FreeBSD, BSDi, and SCO (not to +mention OS/2, Novell, Win95/NT) + -- Nathan E. Norman +% +> + +The branden dodges your magical sigh. The branden attacks you with a +slew of words! The branden misses! + + -- Henning Makholm in +% +I don't think 'It's better than hurling yourself into a meat grinder' +is a good rationale for doing something. + -- Andrew Suffield in + <20030905221055.GA22354@doc.ic.ac.uk> on debian-devel +% +< Overfiend> whew. +< Overfiend> I really need to get some sleep. +< Overfiend> but it sure was fun talking guitars, politics, and lesbians. +% +Whoever asked if the debian organization was dead isn't reading +debian-devel. 66 messages in one day, and it's not over. I find it +difficult to keep up. + -- Bruce Perens +% +< asuffield> fibre in the US is such a joke. in the civilized parts of + the world, DSL *starts* at the speeds where US fibre lets off +< joshk> asuffield: australia is a nation full of savages? +< asuffield> joshk: they've got about one 9600 modem between the whole + damn country + -- in #debian-devel +% +< nobse> bleh... last night I had a dream... someone NMU'ed vim... + nightmare + -- in #debian-devel +% -- 2.40.0