From: Shlomi Fish Date: Tue, 28 Dec 2021 13:28:29 +0000 (+0200) Subject: generate acquisition-rules X-Git-Tag: fortune-mod-3.12.0~3 X-Git-Url: https://granicus.if.org/sourcecode?a=commitdiff_plain;h=aa2b6b49946390a5c98020f2dc67ff08cff9be72;p=fortune-mod generate acquisition-rules See: https://github.com/shlomif/fortune-mod/pull/60 Thanks to @fonic --- diff --git a/fortune-mod/datfiles/CMakeLists.txt b/fortune-mod/datfiles/CMakeLists.txt index b012130..8908435 100644 --- a/fortune-mod/datfiles/CMakeLists.txt +++ b/fortune-mod/datfiles/CMakeLists.txt @@ -10,6 +10,16 @@ else() endif() SET (_unrot_cookies ) SET (_install_unrot_cookies ) +SET(cr "rules-of-acquisition") +SET(crfull "${CMAKE_CURRENT_SOURCE_DIR}/${cr}") +SET(SOURCE "${CMAKE_CURRENT_SOURCE_DIR}/data/rules-of-acquisition.csv") +SET(script "${CMAKE_CURRENT_SOURCE_DIR}/data/rules-of-acquisition-gen.sh") +ADD_CUSTOM_COMMAND( + OUTPUT "${crfull}" + COMMAND "sh" "${script}" "${SOURCE}" "${crfull}" + DEPENDS "${script}" "${SOURCE}" + VERBATIM +) FOREACH(c ${COOKIES}) SET(DEST "${c}.dat") SET(SOURCE "${CMAKE_CURRENT_SOURCE_DIR}/${c}") diff --git a/fortune-mod/datfiles/data/rules-of-acquisition-gen.sh b/fortune-mod/datfiles/data/rules-of-acquisition-gen.sh new file mode 100644 index 0000000..710800e --- /dev/null +++ b/fortune-mod/datfiles/data/rules-of-acquisition-gen.sh @@ -0,0 +1,32 @@ +#!/bin/sh + +# ------------------------------------------------------------------------- +# - +# Created by Fonic - +# Date: 12/28/21 - +# - +# ------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +# Configuration +CSV_DELIMITER="|" +TITLE_TEMPLATE="Ferengi Rule of Acquisition %s:" +RULE_TEMPLATE="%s" +SOURCE_TEMPLATE="-- %s" +FOOTER_TEMPLATE="%%" +LINE_MAXLEN=78 + +# Check command line +if [ $# -ne 2 ]; then + echo "Usage: ${0##*/} INFILE OUTFILE" + exit 2 +fi +infile="$1" +outfile="$2" + +# Convert CSV to DAT + wrap long lines + remove trailing whitespace +while IFS="${CSV_DELIMITER}" read -r number rule source; do + printf -- "${TITLE_TEMPLATE}\n" "${number}" + printf -- "${RULE_TEMPLATE}\n" "${rule}" + printf -- "${SOURCE_TEMPLATE}\n" "${source}" + printf -- "${FOOTER_TEMPLATE}\n" +done < "${infile}" | fold -sw ${LINE_MAXLEN} | sed -e 's/[[:space:]]*$//' > "${outfile}" diff --git a/fortune-mod/datfiles/data/rules-of-acquisition.csv b/fortune-mod/datfiles/data/rules-of-acquisition.csv new file mode 100644 index 0000000..8d213f7 --- /dev/null +++ b/fortune-mod/datfiles/data/rules-of-acquisition.csv @@ -0,0 +1,159 @@ +#0|What the Nagus wants, we acquire.|Star Trek Online (video game) +#1|Once you have their money, you never give it back.|The Nagus (DS9 episode) +#2|The best deal is the one that brings the most profit.|The 34th Rule (DS9 novel) +#2|Money is everything.|The Last Tree on Ferenginar: A Ferengi Fable From the Future (DS9 short story) +#3|Never spend more for an acquisition than you have to.|The Maquis, Part II (DS9 episode) +#4|Sedition and treason are always profitable.|Star Trek Online (video game) +#5|Always exaggerate your estimates.|Cold Fusion (SCE novel) +#6|Never allow family to stand in the way of opportunity.|The Nagus (DS9 episode) +#7|Keep your ears open.|In the Hands of the Prophets (DS9 episode) +#8|Small print leads to large risk.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#9|Opportunity plus instinct equals profit.|The Storyteller (DS9 episode) +#10|Greed is eternal.|Prophet Motive (DS9 episode) +#13|Anything worth doing is worth doing for money.|Legends of the Ferengi (DS9 novel) +#14|Sometimes the quickest way to find profits is to let them find you.|Fortune of War (TTN novel) +#15|Dead men close no deals.|Demons of Air and Darkness (DS9 novel) +#16|A deal is a deal - until a better one comes along.|Melora (DS9 episode), The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#17|A contract is a contract is a contract - but only between Ferengi.|Body Parts (DS9 episode) +#18|A Ferengi without profit is no Ferengi at all.|Heart of Stone (DS9 episode), Ferengi Love Songs (DS9 episode) +#19|Satisfaction is not guaranteed.|Legends of the Ferengi (DS9 novel), The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#20|He who dives under the table today lives to profit tomorrow.|Ferenginar: Satisfaction is Not Guaranteed (DS9 novella) +#21|Never place friendship above profit.|Rules of Acquisition (DS9 episode) +#22|A wise man can hear profit in the wind.|Rules of Acquisition (DS9 episode), False Profits (VOY episode) +#23|Nothing is more important than your health - except for your money.|Acquisition (ENT episode) +#25|You pay for it, it’s your idea.|Ferenginar: Satisfaction is Not Guaranteed (DS9 novella) +#27|There's nothing more dangerous than an honest businessman.|Legends of the Ferengi (DS9 novel) +#29|What's in it for me?|Highest Score (DS9 novel) +#30|Confidentiality equals profit.|The Badlands, Part IV (DS9 novel) +#31|Never make fun of a Ferengi's mother - insult something he cares about instead.|The Siege (DS9 episode), Elite Force II (video game), The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#33|It never hurts to suck up to the boss.|Rules of Acquisition (DS9 episode) +#34|War is good for business.|Destiny (DS9 episode), The 34th Rule (DS9 novel) +#35|Peace is good for business.|Destiny (DS9 episode), The 34th Rule (DS9 novel) +#37|The early investor reaps the most interest.|Reservoir Ferengi (DS9 novella) +#39|Don't tell customers more than they need to know.|Ascendance (DS9 novel) +#40|She can touch your lobes, but never your latinum.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#41|Profit is its own reward.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#43|Feed your greed, but not enough to choke it.|The Buried Age (TNG novel) +#44|Never confuse wisdom with luck.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#45|Expand or die.|Acquisition (ENT episode) +#47|Don't trust a man wearing a better suit than your own.|Rivals (DS9 episode) +#48|The bigger the smile, the sharper the knife.|Rules of Acquisition (DS9 episode) +#52|Never ask when you can take.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#53|Never trust anybody taller than you.|Mission Gamma: Twilight (DS9 novel) +#54|Rate divided by time equals profit (also known as "The Velocity of Wealth").|Typhon Pact: Raise the Dawn (DS9/TNG novel) +#55|Take joy from profit, and profit from joy.|Worlds of Deep Space Nine: Bajor: Fragments and Omens (DS9 novel) +#57|Good customers are as rare as latinum - treasure them.|Armageddon Game (DS9 episode) +#58|There is no substitute for success.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#59|Free advice is seldom cheap.|Rules of Acquisition (DS9 episode) +#60|Keep your lies consistent.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#62|The riskier the road, the greater the profit.|Rules of Acquisition (DS9 episode), Little Green Men (DS9 episode), Business As Usual (DS9 episode) +#63|Work is the best therapy - at least for your employees.|Over a Torrent Sea (TTN novel) +#65|Win or lose, there's always Hupyrian beetle snuff.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#66|Someone's always got bigger ears.|The Last Generation #3: What Happens Now (TNG comic) +#68|Risk doesn't always equal reward.|Star Trek Online (video game) +#69|Ferengi are not responsible for the stupidity of other races.|Balance of Power (TNG novel) +#74|Knowledge equals profit.|Inside Man (VOY episode) +#75|Home is where the heart is - but the stars are made of latinum.|Civil Defense (DS9 episode) +#76|Every once in a while, declare peace. It confuses the hell out of your enemies.|The Homecoming (DS9 episode) +#77|If you break it, I'll charge you for it.|Star Trek Online (video game) +#79|Beware of the Vulcan greed for knowledge.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#82|The flimsier the product, the higher the price.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#85|Never let the competition know what you're thinking.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#87|Learn the customer's weaknesses, so that you can better take advantage of him.|Highest Score (DS9 novel) +#88|It ain't over till it’s over.|Ferenginar: Satisfaction is Not Guaranteed (DS9 novella) +#88|Vengeance will cost you everything.|The Poisoned Chalice (DS9 novel) +#89|Ask not what your profits can do for you, but what you can do for your profits.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#89|[It is] better to lose some profit and live than lose all profit and die.|Strange New Worlds VI: Best Tools Available (DS9 short story) +#92|There are many paths to profit.|Highest Score (DS9 novel) +#94|Females and finances don't mix.|Ferengi Love Songs (DS9 episode), Profit and Lace (DS9 episode), The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#95|Expand or die.|False Profits (VOY episode) +#97|Enough is never enough.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#98|Every man has his price.|In the Pale Moonlight (DS9 episode) +#98|If you can't take it with you, don't go.|I, Q (DS9 novel) +#99|Trust is the biggest liability of all.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#100|When it's good for business, tell the truth.|Ascendance (DS9 novel) +#101|Profit trumps emotion.|The Long Mirage (DS9 novel) +#102|Nature decays, but latinum lasts forever.|The Jem'Hadar (DS9 episode) +#103|Sleep can interfere with opportunity.|Rules of Acquisition (DS9 episode) +#104|Faith moves mountains - of inventory.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#106|There is no honor in poverty.|Sacraments of Fire (DS9 novel) +#108|Hope doesn't keep the lights on.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#109|Dignity and an empty sack is worth the sack.|Rivals (DS9 episode) +#111|Treat people in your debt like family - exploit them.|Past Tense, Part I (DS9 episode) +#112|Never have sex with the boss' sister.|Playing God (DS9 episode) +#113|Always have sex with the boss.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#117|You can't free a fish from water.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#121|Everything is for sale, even friendship.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#122|Never sleep with the bosses sister.|Playing God (DS9 episode) +#123|Even a blind man can recognize the glow of latinum.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#125|You can't make a deal if you're dead.|The Siege of AR-558 (DS9 episode) +#135|Listen to secrets, but never repeat them.|Ascendance (DS9 novel) +#139|Wives serve, brothers inherit.|Necessary Evil (DS9 episode) +#141|Only fools pay retail.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#144|There's nothing wrong with charity - as long as it winds up in your pocket.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#147|People love the bartender.|Fearful Symmetry (DS9 novel) +#151|Even when you're a customer, sell yourself.|The Long Mirage (DS9 novel) +#153|Sell the sizzle, not the steak.|Deep Space Mine (DS9 comic) +#162|Even in the worst of times, someone turns a profit.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book), Harbinger (DS9 video game) +#168|Whisper your way to success.|Treachery, Faith, and the Great River (DS9 episode) +#177|Know your enemies, but do business with them always.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#181|Not even dishonesty can tarnish the shine of profit.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#183|When life hands you ungaberries, make detergent.|Hollow Men (DS9 novel) +#184|A Ferengi waits to bid until his opponents have exhausted themselves.|Balance of Power (TNG novel) +#188|Not even dishonesty can tarnish the shine of profit.|Star Trek Online (video game) +#189|Let others keep their reputation. You keep their money.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#190|Hear all, trust nothing.|Call to Arms (DS9 episode) +#192|Never cheat a Klingon - unless you're sure you can get away with it.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#193|Trouble comes in threes.|Star Trek Online (video game) +#193|It's never too late to fire the staff.|Cathedral (DS9 novel) +#194|It's always good business to know about new customers before they walk in your door.|Whispers (DS9 episode) +#199|Location, location, location.|The Soul Key (DS9 novel) +#200|A Ferengi chooses no side but his own.|Ferenginar: Satisfaction is Not Guaranteed (DS9 novella) +#202|The justification for profit is profit.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#203|New customers are like razor-toothed gree worms. They can be succulent, but sometimes they bite back.|Little Green Men (DS9 episode) +#208|Sometimes the only thing more dangerous than a question is an answer.|Ferengi Love Songs (DS9 episode) +#211|Employees are the rungs on the ladder of success. Don't hesitate to step on them.|Bar Association (DS9 episode) +#212|A good lie is easier to believe than the truth.|Shattered (VOY episode), Star Trek Online (video game) +#214|Never begin a business negotiation on an empty stomach.|The Maquis, Part I (DS9 episode) +#216|Never gamble with a telepath.|The Laertian Gamble (DS9 novel) +#217|You can't free a fish from water.|Past Tense, Part I (DS9 episode) +#218|Always know what you're buying.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#218|Sometimes what you get free costs entirely too much.|Baby on Board (DS9 comic) +#219|Possession is eleven-tenths of the law.|Balance of Power (TNG novel) +#223|Beware the man who doesn't take time for oo-mox.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#227|If that's what's written, then that's what's written.|Favor the Bold (DS9 episode), Star Trek Online (video game) +#229|Latinum lasts longer than lust.|Ferengi Love Songs (DS9 episode) +#235|Duck - death is tall.|Mission Gamma: Twilight (DS9 novel) +#236|You can't buy fate.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#239|Never be afraid to mislabel a product.|Body Parts (DS9 episode) +#240|Time, like latinum, is a highly limited commodity.|Bar Association (DS9 episode), Star Trek Online (video game) +#242|More is good, all is better.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#243|Always leave yourself an out.|Sacraments of Fire (DS9 novel) +#248|The definition of insanity is trying the same failed scheme and expecting different results.|Department of Temporal Investigations: Shield of the Gods (DS9 novella) +#255|A wife is luxury, a smart accountant a necessity.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#261|A wealthy man can afford anything except a conscience.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#263|Never allow doubt to tarnish your lust for latinum.|Bar Association (DS9 episode) +#266|When in doubt, lie.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#267|If you believe it, they believe it.|Taking Wing (DS9 novel) +#272|Always inspect the merchandise before making a deal.|The Abandoned (DS9 episode), Star Trek Online (video game) +#280|If it ain't broke, don't fix it.|Ferenginar: Satisfaction is Not Guaranteed (DS9 novella) +#284|Deep down, everyone's a Ferengi.|The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition (DS9 reference book) +#285|No good deed ever goes unpunished.|The Collaborator (DS9 episode), The Sound of Her Voice (DS9 episode) +#286 (inofficial)|When Morn leaves, it's all over.|The House of Quark (DS9 Episode) +#287|Always get somebody else to do the lifting.|N-Vector (DS9 comic) +#288|Never get into anything that you can't get out of.|N-Vector (DS9 comic) +#289|A man is only worth the sum of his possessions.|Acquisition (ENT episode) +#290|An angry man is an enemy, and a satisfied man is an ally.|Antimatter (DS9 novel) +#291|The less employees know about the cash flow, the smaller the share they can demand.|Betrayal (DS9 novel) +#292|Only a fool passes up a business opportunity.|Elite Force II (video game) +#293|The more time they take deciding, the more money they will spend.|Stowaways (DS9 novel) +#294|A bargain usually isn't.|The Pet (DS9 novel) +#299|Whenever you exploit someone, it never hurts to thank them. That way, it's easier to exploit them the next time.|False Profits (VOY episode) +#431|When the shooting starts, let the mercenaries handle it.|Star Trek Online (video game) +(inofficial)|Exploitation begins at home.|False Profits (VOY episode) +(inofficial, aka "The Unwritten Rule")|When no appropriate rule applies, make one up.|False Profits (VOY episode) +(inofficial)|When the messenger comes to appropriate your profits, kill the messenger.|False Profits (VOY episode) +(inofficial)|Money is money, but females are better.|Life Support (DS9 episode) +(inofficial)|Why ask, when you can take?|Babel (DS9 episode) +(inofficial)|Good things come in small packages.|Move Along Home (DS9) +(inofficial)|A distracted policeman is an opportunity.|The Sound of Her Voice (DS9 episode) diff --git a/fortune-mod/datfiles/rules-of-acquisition b/fortune-mod/datfiles/rules-of-acquisition deleted file mode 100644 index 870ed40..0000000 --- a/fortune-mod/datfiles/rules-of-acquisition +++ /dev/null @@ -1,926 +0,0 @@ -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -1. Once you have their money, never give it back -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -2. You can't cheat an honest customer, but it never hurts to try -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -3. Never spend more for an acquisition than you have to -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -4. Sex and profit are the two things that never last long enough -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -5. If you can't break a contract, bend it -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -6. Never let family stand in the way of opportunity -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -7. Always keep you ears open -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -8. Keep count of your change -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -9. Instinct plus opportunity equals profit -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -10. A dead customer can't buy as much as a live one -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -11. Latinum isn't the only thing that shines -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -12. Anything worth selling is worth selling twice -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -13. Anything worth doing is worth doing for money -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -14. Anything stolen is pure profit -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -15. Acting stupid is often smart -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -16. A deal is a deal ... until a better one comes along -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -17. A bargain usually isn't -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -18. A Ferengi without profit is no Ferengi at all -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -19. Don't lie too soon after a promotion -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -20. When the customer is sweating, turn up the heat -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -21. Never place friend ship before profit -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -22. wise men can hear profit in the wind -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -23. Never take the last coin, but be sure to get the rest -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -24. Never ask when you can take -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -25. Fear makes a good business partner -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -26. The vast majority of the rich in this galaxy did not inherit their wealth; -they stole it -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -27. The most beautiful thing about a tree is what you do with it after you cut -it down -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -28. Morality is always defined by those in power -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -29. When someone says "It's not the money," they're lying -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -30. Talk is cheap; synthehol costs money -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -31. Never make fun of a Ferengi's mother -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -32. Be careful what you sell. It may do exactly what the customer expects -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -33. It never hurts to suck up to the boss -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -34. War is good for business -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -35. Peace is good for business -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -36. Too many Ferengi can't laugh at themselves anymore -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -37. You can always buy back a lost reputation -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -38. Free advertising is cheap -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -39. Praise is cheap. Heap it generously on all customers -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -40. If you see profit on a journey, take it -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -41. Money talks, but having a lots of it gets more attention -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -42. Only negotiate when you are certain to profit -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -43. Caressing an ear is often more forceful than pointing a weapon -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -44. Never argue with a loaded phaser -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -45. profit has limits. Loss has none -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -46. Labor camps are full of people who trusted the wrong person -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -47. Never trust a man wearing a better suit than you own -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -48. The bigger the smile, the sharper the knife -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -49. Old age and greed will always overcome youth and talent -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -50. Never bluff a Klingon -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -51. Never admit a mistake if there's someone else to blame -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -52. Only Bugsy could have built Las Vegas -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -53. Sell first; ask questions later -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -54. Never buy anything you can't sell -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -55. Always sell at the highest possible profit -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -56. Pursue profit; women come later -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -57. Good customers are almost as rare as Latinum - treasure them -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -58. Friendship is seldom cheap -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -59. Fee advice is never cheap -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -60. Never use Latinum where your words will do -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -61. Never buy what can be stolen -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -62. The riskier the road, the greater the profit -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -63. power without profit is like a ship without an engine -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -64. Don't talk shop; talk shopping -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -65. Don't talk ship; talk shipping -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -66. Anyone serving in a fleet who is crazy can be relieved, if they ask for it -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -67. Enough is never enough -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -68. Compassion is no substitute for a profit -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -69. You could afford your ship without your government - if it weren't for -your government -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -70. Get the money first, then let the buyers worry about collecting the -merchandise -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -71. Gamble and trade have two things in common: risk and Latinum -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -72. Never let the competition know, what you're thinking -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -73. Never trust advice from a dying Ferengi; listen but don't trust -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -74. A Ferengi without profit is no Ferengi at all -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -75. Home is where the heart is, but the stars are made of Latinum -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -76. Every once in a while, declare peace. It confuses the hell out of your -enemies -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -77. Go where no Ferengi has gone before; where there is no reputation there is -profit -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -78. There is a customer born every minute -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -79. Beware of the Vulcan greed for knowledge -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -80. If it works, sell it. If it works well, sell it for more. If it doesn't -work, quadruple the price and sell it as an antique -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -81. There's nothing more dangerous than an honest businessman -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -82. A smart customer is not a good customer -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -83. Revenge is profitless -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -84. She can touch your ears but never your Latinum -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -85. Death takes no bribes -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -86. A wife is a luxury, a smart accountant a necessity -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -87. Trust is the biggest liability of all -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -88. When the boss comes to dinner, it never hurts to have the wife wear -something -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -89. Latinum lasts longer than lust -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -90. Mine is better than ours -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -91. He who drinks fast pays slow -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -92. Never confuse wisdom with luck -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -93. He's a fool who makes his doctor his heir -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -94. Beware of small expenses: a small leak will kill a ship -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -95. Important, more impotant, Latinum -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -96. Faith moves mountains - of inventory -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -97. If you would keep a secret from an enemy, don't tell it to a friend -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -98. Profit is the better part of valor -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -99. Never trust a wise man -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -100. Everything that has no owner, needs one -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -101. Never do something you can make someone do for you -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -102. Nature decays, but Latinum lasts forever -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -103. Sleep can interfere with opportunity -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -104. Money is never made. It is merely won or lost -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -105. Wise men don't lie, they just bend the truth -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -106. There is no honor in poverty -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -107. Win or lose, there's always Huyperian Beetle Snuff -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -108. A woman wearing clothes is like a man without profit -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -109. Dignity and an empty sack is worth the sack -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -110. Only a fool passes up a business opportunity -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -111. Treat people in your debt like family ... exploit them -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -112. Never sleep with the boss's wife unless you pay him first -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -113. Never sleep with the boss's sister -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -114. Small print lead to large risk -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -115. Greed is eternal -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -116. There's always a way out -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -117. If the profit seems too good to be true, it usually is -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -118. Never cheat a honest man offering a decent price -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -119. Buy, sell, or get out of the way -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -120. Even a blind man can recognize the glow of Latinum -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -121. Everything is for sale, even friendship -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -122. As the customers go, so goes the wise profiteer -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -123. A friend is only a friend until you sell him something. Then he is a -customer -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -124. Friendship is temporary, profit is forever -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -125. A lie isn't a lie until someone else knows the truth -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -126. A lie isn't a lie, it's just the truth seen from a different point of -view -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -127. Gratitude can bring on generosity -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -128. Ferengi are not responsible for the stupidity of other races -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -129. Never trust your customers -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -130. Never trust a beneficiary -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -131. If it gets you profit, sell your own mother -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -132. The flimsier the produce, the higher the price -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -133. Never judge a customer by the size of his wallet ... sometimes good -things come in small packages -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -134. There's always a catch -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -135. The only value of a collectible is what you can get somebody else to pay -for it -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -136. The sharp knife cuts quickly. Act without delay! -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -137. Necessity is the mother of invention. Profit is the father -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -138. Law makes everyone equal, but justice goes to the highest bidder -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -139. Wives serve; brother inherit -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -140. The answer to quick and easy profit is: buy for less, sell for more -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -141. Competition and fair play are mutually exclusive. Fait play and financial -loss go hand-in-hand -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -142. A Ferengi waits to bid until his opponents have exhausted themselves -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -143. The family of Fools is ancient -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -144. There's nothing wrong with charity ... as long as it winds up in your -pocket -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -145. Always ask for the costs first -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -146. If possible sell neither the sizzle nor the steak, but the Elphasian -wheat germ -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -147. New customers are like razor toothed gree worms. They can be succulent, -but sometimes they bite back -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -148. Opportunity waits for no one -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -149. Females and finances don't mix -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -150. Make your shop easy to find -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -151. Sometimes, what you get free costs entirely too much -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -152. Ask not what your profits can do for you; ask what you can do for your -profits -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -153. You can't free a fish from water -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -154. The difference between manure and Latinum is commerece -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -155. What's mine is mine, and what's yours is mine too -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -156. Even in the worst of times someone turns a profit -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -157. You are surrounded by opportunities; you just have to know where to look -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -158. Don't pay until you have the goods -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -159. The customer is always right ... until you have their cash -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -160. Respect is good, Latinum is better -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -161. Never kill a customer, unless you make more profit out of his death than -out of his life -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -162. His money is only your's when he can't get it back -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -163. A thirsty customer is good for profit, a drunk one isn't -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -164. Never spend your own money when you can spend someone else's -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -165. Never allow one's culture's law to get in the way of a universal goal: -profit -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -166. Never give away for free what can be sold -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -167. If a deal is fairly and lawfully made, then seeking revenge especially -unprofitable revenge, is illegal -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -168. Beware of relatives bearing gifts -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -169. If you're going to have to endure, make yourself comfortable -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -170. Never gamble with an empath -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -171. Time is Latinum. The early Ferengi get the Latinum -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -172. If you can sell it, don't hsitate to steal it -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -173. A piece of Latinum in the hand is worth two in a customer's pocket -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -174. Share and perish -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -175. When everything fails - run -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -176. Ferengi's don't give promotional gifts! -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -177. Know your enemies ... but do business with them always -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -178. The world is a stage - don't forget to demand admission -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -179. Whenever you think that things can't get worse, the FCA will be knocking -on you door -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -180. Never offer a confession when a bribe will do -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -181. Even dishonesty can't tarnish the glow of Latinum -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -182. Whenever you're being asked if you are god, the right answer is YES -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -183. Genius without opportunity is like Latinum in the mine -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -184. There are three things you must not talk to aliens: sex, religion and -taxes -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -185. If you want to ruin yourself there are three known ways: Gambling is the -fastest, women are the sweetest, and banks are the most reliable way -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -186. There are two things that will catch up with you for sure: death and -taxes -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -187. If your dancing partner wants to lead at all costs, let her have her own -way and ask another one to dance -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -188. Never bet on a race you haven't fixed -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -189. Borrow on a handshake; lend in writing -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -190. Drive your business or it will drive you -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -191. Let other keep their reputation. You keep their money -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -192. If the flushing isn't strong enough, use your brain and try the brush -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -193. Klingon women don't dance tango -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -194. It's always good business to know about new customers before they walk in -your door -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -195. Wounds heal, but debt is forever -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -196. Only give money to people you know you can steal from -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -197. Never trust your customers, especially if they are your relatives -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -198. Employees are the rungs on your ladder to success - don't hesitate to -step on them -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -199. The secret of one person is another person's opportunity -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -200. A madman with Latinum means profit without return -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -201. The justification for profit is profit -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -202. a) A friend in need is a customer in the making - b) A friend in need means three times the profit -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -203. A Ferengi in need, will never do anything for free -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -204. When the Grand Nagus arrives to offer you a business opportunity, it's -time to leave town until he's gone -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -205. When the customer dies, the money stops a-comin' -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -206. Fighting with Klingons is like gambling with Cardassians - it's good to -have a friend around when you lose -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -207. Never trust a hardworking employee -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -208. Give someone a fish, you feed him for one day. Teach him how to fish, -and you lose a steady customer -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -209. Tell them what they want to hear -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -210. A wife, who is able to clean, saves the cleaning lady -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -211. In business deals, a disruptor can be almost as important as a calculator -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -212. If they accept your first offer, you either asked too little or offered -too much -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -213. Stay neutral in conflicts so that you can sell supplies to both sides -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -214. Never begin a business transaction on an empty stomach -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -215. Instinct without opportunity is useless -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -216. Never take hospitality from someone worse off than yourself -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -217. Only pay for it, if you are confronted with loaded phaser -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -218. Always know what you're buying -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -219. A friend is not a friend if he asks for a discount -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -220. Profit is like a bed of roses - a few thorns are inevitable -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -221. Beware of any man who thinks with his lobes -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -222. Knowledge is Latinum -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -223. Rich men don't come to buy; they come to take -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -224. Never throw anything away: It may be worht a lot of Latinum some Stardate -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -225. Pride comes before a loss -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -226. Don't take your family for granted, only their Latinum -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -227. Loyalty can be bought ... and sold -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -228. All things come to those who wait, even Latinum -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -229. Beware the man who doesn't make time for oo-mox -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -230. Manipulation may be a Ferengi's greatest tool, and liability -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -231. If you steal it, make sure it has a warranty -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -232. Life's no fair (How else would you turn a profit?) -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -233. Every dark cloud has a Latinum lining -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -234. Never deal with beggars; it's bad for profits -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -235. Don't trust anyone who trusts you -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -236. You can't buy fate -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -237. There's a sucker born every minute. Be sure you're the first to find -each one -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -238. The truth will cost -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -239. Ambition knows no family -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -240. The higher you bid, the more customers you drive away -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -241. Never underestimate the inportance of the fist impression -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -242. More is good, all is better -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -243. If you got something nice to say, then SHOUT -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -244. If you can't sell it, sit on it, but never give it away -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -245. A warranty is valid only if they can find you -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -246. He that speaks ill of the wares will buy them -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -247. Never question luck -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -248. Celebrate when you are paid, not, when you are promised -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -249. Respect other culture's beliefs; they'll be more likely to give you money -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -250. A dead vendor doesn't demand money -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -251. Satisfaction is not guaranteed -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -252. Let the buyer beware -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -253. A contract without fine print is a fool's document -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -254. Anyone who can't tell a fake doesn't deserve the real thing -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -255. A warranty without loop-holes is a liability -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -256. Synthehol is the lubricant of choice for a customer's stuck purse -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -257. Only fools negotiate with their own money -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -258. A Ferengi is only as important as the amount of Latinum he carries in his -pockets -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -259. A lie is a way to tell the truth to someone who doesn't know -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -260. Gambling is like the way to power: The only way to win is to cheat, but -don't get caught in the process -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -261. A wealthy man can afford everything except a conscience -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -262. No lobes, no profit -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -263. Never let a female in clothes cloud your sense of profit -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -264. It's not the size of your planet, but it's income, that matters -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -265. The fear of loss may be your greatest enemy or your best friend - choose -wisely -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -266. A pair of good ears will ring dry a hundred tongues -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -267. Wish not so much to live Long, as to live well -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -268. a) When in doubt, lie - b) When in doubt, buy - c) When in doubt, demand more money - d) When in doubt, shoot them, take their money, run and blame someone - else -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -269. Never purchase anything that has been promised to be valuable or go up in -value -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -270. It's better to have gambled and lost than to never have gambled at all -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -271. There's many witty men whose brains can't line their pockets -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -272. The way to a Ferengi's heart is through his wallet -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -273. Always count their Latinum before selling anything -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -274. There is no profit in love; however, a strong heart is worth a few bars -of Latinum on the open market. Keep it on ice -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -275. Latinum can't buy happiness, but you can sure have a blast renting it -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -276. If at first you don't succeed, try to acquire again -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -277. Diamonds may be girl's best friend, but you can only buy the girl with -Latinum -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -278. It's better to swallow your pride than to lose your profit -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -279. Never close a deal too soon after a female strokes your lobes -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -280. An empty bag can not stand upright -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -281. Blood is thicker than water, but harder to sell -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -282. Business is like war; it's important to recognize the winner -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -283. Rules are always subject to change -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -284. Rules are always subject to interpretation -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -285. No good deed ever goes unpunished -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -286. When Morn leaves it is all over -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -287. Whenever you exploit someone, it never hurts to thank them. That way, -it's easier to exploit them the next time. (Neelix made this rule up) -% -Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition: -The Unwritten Rule: When no appropriate Rule applies, make one up! -% -Zek's Revised Ferengi Rules of Acquisition: -Rule 001 » If they want their money back, give it to them. -% -Zek's Revised Ferengi Rules of Acquisition: -Rule 010 » Greed is dead. -% -Zek's Revised Ferengi Rules of Acquisition: -Rule 021 » Never place profit before friendship. -% -Zek's Revised Ferengi Rules of Acquisition: -Rule 022 » Latinum tarnishes, but family is forever. -% -Zek's Revised Ferengi Rules of Acquisition: -Rule 023 » Money can never replace dignity. -% -Zek's Revised Ferengi Rules of Acquisition: -Rule 285 » A good deed is its own reward. -%