--- /dev/null
+What is is. Perceive It. Integrate it. Act on it. Idealize it.
+
+ -- Leonard Peikoff
+%
+I/O, I/O,
+It's off to disk I go,
+a bit or byte to read or write,
+I/O, I/O, I/O, I/O
+
+ -- Dave Peacock
+ -- His signature
+%
+Will: "Roses are red,
+Violets are Blue.
+Jazz and I are black,
+But, Carlton, what are you?"
+
+Excerpt from "The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air"
+
+ -- Andy Borowitz (Creator)
+ -- "The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air" ( )
+%
+And the top story for today: wives live longer than husbands because they are
+not married to women.
+
+ -- Colin Mochrie
+ -- "Who's Line is it, Anyway?" ( )
+%
+Let others praise ancient times; I am glad I was born in these.
+
+ -- Ovid (43 BC - 18 AD)
+%
+I'm sexy, I'm cute, I'm popular to boot.
+I'm bitchin', great hair, the boys all love to stare!
+I'm wanted, I'm hot, I'm everything you're not.
+I'm pretty, I'm cool, I dominate this school.
+Who am I? Just guess. Guys wanna touch my chest.
+I'm rockin', I smile and many think I'm vile.
+I'm flying, I jump you can look but don't you hump. Whoo!
+I major, I roar. I swear I'm not a whore.
+We cheer and we lead - we act like we're on speed.
+You hate us cause we're beautiful but we don't like you either.
+We're cheerleaders. We are cheerleaders!
+
+Excerpt from "Bring it On"
+
+ -- Bring it On (The Original) ( )
+%
+An algebra teacher is discussing a problem with a student. The teacher says:
+"Now, suppose x is the speed at which the train is travelling…". And the
+student says "But teacher, what if x is not the speed at which the train is
+travelling?"
+
+ -- Unknown
+ -- Re: "A Parody on Aristotle's Organum" ( )
+%
+Keep all the grades of the students who passed the test as is, and convert the
+grades of all the students who failed to 54%.
+
+ -- Shlomi Fish
+ -- Based on a Technion Legend
+%
+“God is Dead”
+
+— Nietzsche
+
+“Nietzsche is Dead”
+
+— God
+
+( writing on a toilet's wall )
+
+ -- Anonymous toilet's wall writers
+ -- Writing on a toilet's wall.
+%
+A serious and good philosophical work could be written that would consist
+entirely of jokes.
+
+-- Ludwig Wittgenstein
+
+ -- Ludwig Wittgenstein
+%
+The difference between a bad student and a good student is that a bad student
+forgets all the material five minutes before the exam, while a good student
+five minutes after it.
+
+ -- One of Shlomi Fish's Lecturers
+ -- Technion Class
+%
+[Isaac Newton falls off the tree]
+
+Cho-Cho: Did the fall hurt you?
+
+Newton: It wasn't the fall; it was the sudden stop at the end.
+
+ -- Tom Ruegger
+ -- Histeria! ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Histeria! )
+%
+Beware of bugs in the above code; I have only proved it correct, not tried it.
+
+ -- Donald Knuth
+ -- Memo to Peter van Emde Boas ( )
+%
+<<<
+
+<<<
+
+It's not because they have suddenly converted to Stallmanism.
+
+>>>
+
+Anyone else misread that as "Stalinism"?
+
+>>>
+
+The word "Stalinism" is deprecated, the correct term is "GNU/Communism".
+
+-- Spotted on Slashdot
+
+ -- k98sven
+ -- Slashdot Comment: “Re: Misread” ( )
+%
+Personally, I'd have a far better time writing scripts if I had some more
+creative shells to script in…
+
+ASMsh: The Assembly shell. Commands include MOV, SHL, SHR, JNE, etc.
+
+shellTM: Turing machine shell. Only four commands. Read, write, move left,
+move right. Capable of producing any programming language imaginable, given
+enough time and nerves of steel.
+
+GeneSH: Four commands. G, A, T, C. Need I say more?
+
+Qsh: Only uses one environment variable, which contains all possible values
+simultaneously. Method of scripting: isolate the universe in which the desired
+result is already accomplished, and intersect with it.
+
+Of course, I never said they'd be easy to use. But then, if these shells
+existed, and I knew a sysadmin who used any of them, you can believe Sysadmin
+Day would be a far more celebrated holiday.
+
+The Night Watchman on a Slashdot Comment
+
+ -- The Night Watchman
+ -- Slashdot comment.
+%
+We're on a mission from God.
+
+-- The Blues Brothers
+
+ -- Dan Aykroyd and John Landis
+ -- "The Blues Brothers" ( http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Blues_brothers )
+%
+It may look like I'm just sitting here doing nothing, but I'm really actively
+waiting for all my problems to go away.
+
+ -- Unknown
+ -- Unknown
+%
+I'm going to do a routine now, the ones of you that have heard it before may
+enjoy hearing it again. The ones of you that have not heard it before - may
+enjoy hearing it again next time.
+
+ -- Victor Borge
+ -- Phonetic Punctuation ( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lF4qii8S3gw )
+%
+I guess I really am an optimist. A paranoid optimist, true, but an optimist
+nonetheless.
+
+Larry Wall, "The 3rd State of the Onion"
+
+ -- Larry Wall
+ -- 3rd State of the Onion ( )
+%
+In fact, I think Linus's [= Linus Torvalds'] cleverest and most consequential
+hack was not the construction of the Linux kernel itself, but rather his
+invention of the Linux development model. When I expressed this opinion in his
+presence once, he smiled and quietly repeated something he has often said:
+"I'm basically a very lazy person who likes to get credit for things other
+people actually do." Lazy like a fox. Or, as Robert Heinlein famously wrote of
+one of his characters, too lazy to fail.
+
+Eric Raymond, the "Cathedral and the Bazaar"
+
+ -- Eric Raymond
+ -- The Cathedral and the Bazaar ( )
+%
+Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty
+is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote.
+
+Misattributed to Benjamin Franklin
+
+ -- Not clear
+ -- Quotes about Democracy ( http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Democracy )
+%
+Shlomi Fish: And to think that home desktops can simulate these systems [=
+PDP-10's and PDP-11's] much faster than those ancient mainframes.
+
+William Lee Irwin III: Shlomi, and to think the net usefulness of the home
+desktops is less than what users got out of those mainframes.
+
+#offtopic on the oftc.net IRC network.
+
+ -- William Lee Irwin III
+%
+I feel much better, now that I've given up hope.
+
+Ashleigh Brilliant
+
+ -- Ashleigh Brilliant
+ -- "I Feel Much Better, Now That I've Given Up Hope ( )
+%
+I may not be totally perfect, but parts of me are excellent.
+
+Ashleigh Brilliant
+
+ -- Ashleigh Brilliant
+ -- I May Not Be Totally Perfect, but Parts of Me Are Excellent ( )
+%
+The question of whether a computer can think is no more interesting than the
+question of whether a submarine can swim.
+
+Edsger W. Dijkstra
+
+ -- Edsger W. Dijkstra
+ -- EWD898 - The threats to computing science ( )
+%
+Sometimes I think the surest sign, that intelligent life exists else where in
+our universe is, is that none of it has tried to contact us.
+
+Calvin
+
+ -- Bill Watterson
+ -- Calvin & Hobbes quotes ( )
+%
+The more I think about it, the more I think I should think about it some more.
+
+Clarissa in "Clarissa Explains it All"
+
+ -- Clarissa Explains it All ( )
+%
+Rusty Russell's signature:
+
+Anyone who quotes me in their sig is an idiot.
+-- Rusty Russell
+
+ -- Rusty Russell
+ -- Rusty Russell's Signature ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rusty_Russell )
+%
+The First Law of Thermodynamics: A system with a constant energy, volume and
+pressure behaves in any way it wants.
+
+ -- Unknown
+%
+I wrote them (and looking at the original ones, I'm a bit ashamed: the
+"toupper()" and "tolower()" macros are so horribly ugly that I wouldn't admit
+to writing them if it wasn't because somebody else claimed to have done so.)
+
+Linus Torvalds on the Linux Kernel Mailing List in response to SCO's Linux
+Kernel ownership claims.
+
+ -- Linus Torvalds
+ -- Post to the Linux Kernel Mailing List ( )
+%
+Baby making is owned by SCO. Linus's mother never paid royalties.
+
+Also, having a name is a SCO trade secret. By giving Linus a name, they again
+ask for being fined.
+
+Best regards,
+
+Iztok
+
+(p.s.: Iztok is owned by SCO, and phrase "Best Regards" as well. LWN is owned
+by SCO.)
+
+An LWN comment in regards to the SCO ownership claims of Linux Kernel code.
+
+ -- Iztok
+ -- Linus is "owned by SCO" ( http://lwn.net/Articles/64272/ )
+%
+The source of my intention
+really isn't crime prevention
+My intention is prevention of the lie.
+
+Scatman John
+"Scatman's World"
+
+ -- Scatman John
+ -- Scatman's World ( )
+%
+To follow the path:
+look to the master,
+follow the master,
+walk with the master,
+see through the master,
+become the master.
+
+Eric S. Raymond in "How To Become a Hacker"
+
+ -- Eric Raymond
+ -- How to Become a Hacker ( )
+%
+ <strestout1> Can GIMP save to svg?
+ <rindolf> strestout1: SVG is a vector graphics format.
+ <rindolf> strestout1: GIMP manipulates bitmaps.
+ <strestout1> Yes rindolf, I know.
+ <strestout1> I just thought it would be nice to have one app for
+ everything instead of having to use inkscape for svg and
+ gimp for everything else.
+ <UnNamed> It could do 3d too.
+ <schumaml> And Audio processing…
+ <UnNamed> And Audio mixing…
+ <UnNamed> And word processing…
+ <schumaml> And it gotta have a kitchen sink!
+ <schumaml> So, the real question might be: is there an image editing
+ mode for Emacs? ;)
+
+ -- "GIMP Should Manipulate SVGs"
+ -- #gimp, GimpNet
+%
+My God, My God,
+May it never, never end.
+The sand and the sea,
+the jitter of the water,
+the shine of the sky,
+the prayer of Man.
+
+"A Walk to Caesarea" / Hanah Senesh
+( Translated from Hebrew by Shlomi Fish )
+
+ -- Hanah Senesh
+ -- Walk to Caesarea
+%
+'You must know that I am not without artifice where magic is concerned,' said
+Weasel. 'Only last year did I - assisted by my friend there - part the
+notoriously powerful Archmage of Ymitury from his staff, his belt of moon
+jewels, and his life, in that approximate order.'
+
+ -- Terry Pratchett
+ -- The Colour of Magic ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Colour_of_Magic )
+%
+If we want to have any kind of confidence that the hash is really unbreakable,
+we should make it not just longer than 160 bits, we should make sure that it's
+two or more hashes, and that they are based on totally different principles.
+
+And we should all digitally sign every single object too, and we should use
+4096-bit PGP keys and unguessable passphrases that are at least 20 words in
+length. And we should then build a bunker 5 miles underground, encased in
+lead, so that somebody cannot flip a few bits with a ray-gun, and make us
+believe that the sha1's match when they don't. Oh, and we need to all wear
+aluminum propeller beanies to make sure that they don't use that ray-gun to
+make us do the modification _ourselves_.
+
+ -- Linus Torvalds
+ -- Message to the git mailing list ( http://lwn.net/Articles/132513/ )
+%
+The dictionary definition of capitalism is: An economic system characterized
+by private ownership of capital goods and by investments that are determined
+by private decision rather than by state control. Prices, production and
+distribution of goods are determined by a free market.
+
+…
+
+But most writers and commentators put dishonest altruistic-platonistic
+connotations on the meaning of capitalism: A system of exploitation of the
+weak by the strong -- devoid of love and good will. A system in which unwanted
+goods and services are pushed onto consumers through clever, deceptive
+advertising for the sole purpose of profits and greed. Capitalism dominates
+most Western governments. Capitalism, big business, and fascism are
+synonymous.
+
+Neo-Tech IV / The Neo-Tech Discovery.
+
+ -- Frank R. Wallace
+ -- Neo Tech IV ( http://xrl.us/bmszm )
+%
+Which mindset is right? Mine, of course. People who disagree with me are by
+definition crazy. (Until I change my mind, when they can suddenly become
+upstanding citizens. I'm flexible, and not black-and-white.)
+
+ -- Linus Torvalds
+ -- Linus compares Linux and BSDs ( http://www.linux.com/articles/45571 )
+%
+One bug, two bugs, tar bugs, su bugs,
+grep bugs, mew bugs, old bugs, new bugs.
+This bug has a little hack,
+This bug has a broken stack.
+Say! What a lot of bugs to track.
+Yes, some are in tar, and some in su.
+Some are old. And some are new.
+Some in sed, and some in jed.
+And some are even in parted.
+Why are they in parted, jed and sed?
+I do not know. Bugs should be dead!
+Some in jpeg, and some in TIFF
+This TIFF one has an attached diff.
+From there to here, from here to there
+Test release bugs are everywhere.
+
+ -- Red Hat Inc. Fedora Workers
+ -- Fedora Core 2 Test 2 available for x86 and x86-64 ( )
+%
+"I took the sweet life
+but I never knew
+I'd be bitter from the sweet"
+
+ -- Charlene
+ -- I've Never Been to Me ( )
+%
+Yet, acting on fully integrated honesty (Neo-Tech), not reason itself, is the
+basic moral act. When Genghis Khan, for example, chose to use reasoning for a
+specific military move, then in an out-of-context sense, he chose to act
+morally by protecting himself and his troops (thus filling human biological
+needs). But in the larger sense of fully integrated honesty, Khan's total
+actions were grossly immoral in choosing to use aggressive force in becoming a
+mass murderer (thus negating human biological needs). The highly destructive,
+irrational immorality of Genghis Khan's overall dictatorial military actions
+far outweighed any narrow, out-of-context "moral" actions. …Genghis Khan was
+enormously evil as were Stalin, Hitler, Mao, Castro, Pol Pot.
+
+[Neo-Tech Orientation and Definitions](http://www.neo-tech.com/orientation/)
+
+ -- Frank R. Wallace
+ -- Neo Tech Orientation and Definitions ( )
+%
+Why are there so many unmaintainable applications written in PHP and Perl?
+Because PHP and Perl let undisciplined, inexperienced programmers write useful
+code. So does Ruby -- but give it the popularity and longevity of PHP and Perl
+(at least in English-speaking circles) and I bet you'll see plenty of bad code
+written in Ruby too.
+
+This seems like a variant of the Hackers and Painters fallacy. (Paul Graham is
+rich. Paul Graham writes Lisp. Therefore everyone who writes Lisp will get
+rich.) "All of the good, smart programmers I know are using Ruby. They write
+good code. Therefore you can't write bad code in Ruby!"
+
+It feels like there's another fallacy in there somewhere. I want to call it
+the Pre-Post-Java Blindspot, where Java was the beginning of Serious
+Programming Languages and only its successor will unseat it. (Like any good
+fallacy, you have to ignore history, such as the fact that Ruby's between 10
+and 12 years old.)
+
+(I mean, if you really just can't read regular expressions, why not admit it?
+You could start a twelve-step program or something.)
+
+ -- chromatic
+ -- Blog Post for 17-Novemeber-2005 ( )
+%
+I have upgraded the plot device's hard-drive, soft-drive and squishy drive,and
+it is now being the world's most powerful super-computer!
+
+The Angry Scientist in "Sheep in the Big City"
+
+ -- Mo Willems
+ -- Sheep in the Big City ( )
+%
+Do not meddle in the affairs of Dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good
+with ketchup.
+
+Source unknown.
+
+ -- Unknown Author
+ -- Internet Meme
+%
+Much of the relative simplicity of Java is - like for most new languages -
+partly an illusion and partly a function of its incompleteness. As time
+passes, Java will grow significantly in size and complexity. It will double or
+triple in size and grow implementation-dependent extensions or libraries. That
+is the way every commercially successful language has developed. Just look at
+any language you consider successful on a large scale. I know of no
+exceptions, and there are good reasons for this phenomenon. [I wrote this
+before 2000; now see a preview of Java 1.5 -
+[
+]
+
+ -- Bjarne Stroustrup
+ -- F.A.Q. Entry about Java ( )
+%
+"I simply hate, detest, loathe, despise, and abhor redundancy."
+
+An Oscar Wilde quote, that quotes Oscar Wilde on his views on Redundancy in a
+quote.
+
+ -- Uncyclopedia
+ -- Uncyclopedia entry about Redundancy ( )
+%
+In yesterday's post (Bitten by the Enterprise Bug), we learned how vital
+enterprise application are for proactive organizations leveraging collective
+synergy to think outside the box and formulate their key objectives into a
+win-win game plan with a quality-driven approach that focuses on empowering
+key players to drive-up their core competencies and increase expectations with
+an all-around initiative to drive up the bottom-line.
+
+[
+
+ -- The Daily WTF
+ -- The Daily WTF - Enterprise SQL ( )
+%
+He says "One and one and one is three".
+Got to be good-looking 'cause he's so hard to see.
+
+Excerpt from "Come Together" by the Beatles.
+
+ -- The Beatles
+ -- Come Together ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Come_Together )
+%
+Isolde: Any museum has a certain Americana factor. But the Smithsonian… This
+is the one place you can find the very essence of America, distilled.
+
+Millie: Ooh.. do they let you drink it, and then take on mutant American
+superpowers, and then go around unilaterally dispensing frontier-style justice
+in the name of "Freedom"?
+
+Isolde: No, not usually.
+
+Millie: Museums would be a lot more fun if they'd actually *read* what I put
+in their suggestion boxes.
+
+ -- D.C. Simpson
+ -- Ozy and Millie - "The Essence of America" ( )
+%
+Version 7? [of Vim]
+
+GNU Emacs is at version 21.4. Can we really trust such an immature editor?
+
+"yet another coward" in a Slashdot comment for the announcement of the release
+of Vim version 7. [Slashdot
+comment](http://it.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=185216&cid=15286781)
+
+ -- yet another coward
+ -- Comment on the release of Vim version 7 ( )
+%
+ <deadchip> Computer: Remove characters 'nenolod' and 'sxpert'.
+ <deadchip> *beeepbeepbeebeeep*
+ <deadchip> Computer: Resume program.
+ <sxpert> "Program cannot run without characters 'nenolod' and
+ 'sxpert'. restoring instances.
+ <deadchip> Computer: Command override, command code Lt. Cmdr. Milosz
+ Derezynski omega-3-3-9-alpha zero. Remove instances 'nenolod'
+ and 'sxpert'.
+ <deadchip> "Unable to comply."
+ <deadchip> "Computer: Is it possible to at least, _alter_ the
+ subprograms nenolod and sxpert?"
+ <deadchip> "Specify parameters."
+ <deadchip> hmm i take that as a "yes"
+ <sxpert> lol
+ <deadchip> "Computer: Please remove 'nonsense' component from 'sxpert'
+ character."
+ <deadchip> "Affirmative."
+ <sxpert> "unable to comply. "
+ <deadchip> bah
+ <deadchip> yeah
+ <nenolod> grr
+ <deadchip> you're truly un-nonsensifiable
+ <deadchip> hahaha
+ <sxpert> "the intellectual subroutines are not alterable"
+ <deadchip> "Computer: Is it possible to alter the _look_ of the
+ character 'sxpert'?"
+ <deadchip> "Affirmative."
+ <deadchip> "Computer: Please dress character 'sxpert' in a clown's
+ costume."
+ <deadchip> "Specify parameters."
+ <deadchip> "Mid-20th-century Earth, Balkan area."
+ <deadchip> "Processing. Character alteration complete."
+ <deadchip> sxpert: bah
+ <deadchip> yeah i knew you would delete the whole databank first
+ <sxpert> lol
+ <geekoe> "Computer, can we …. finally… simply remover the characters
+ 'sxpert'?"
+ <sxpert> "computer, here's arlequin costume. apply to character
+ deadchip"
+ <sxpert> "character parameters changed"
+ <sxpert> "woop"
+ <geekoe> :D
+ <deadchip> o_O
+
+ -- Star Trek-Like Plot
+ -- #bmp, Freenode
+%
+I'd love to change the world, but they won't give me the source code.
+
+— Unknown
+
+ -- Unknown Author
+ -- Unknown
+%
+Pumbaa: Timon, ever wonder what those sparkly dots are up there?
+
+Timon: Pumbaa, I don't wonder; I know.
+
+Pumbaa: Oh. What are they?
+
+Timon: They're fireflies. Fireflies that, uh… got stuck up on that big
+bluish-black thing.
+
+Pumbaa: Oh, gee. I always thought they were gigantic balls of gas burning
+billions of miles away.
+
+Timon: Pumbaa, with you, everything's gas.
+
+ -- Walt Disney Corp
+ -- "The Lion King" ( http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0110357/ )
+%
+>That's the nice thing about UNIX, it gives you so many >ways to shoot
+yourself in the foot. :)
+
+At least it does allow you to shoot yourself in the foot.
+
+It doesn't say "shooting feet isn't supported"
+
+Or you can shoot yourself in the foot by writing a management console plugin
+that will pass the data to Word using VBA and then call Excel via com to split
+it into columns and then write an activeX control to get the columns back as
+
+ -- Martin
+ -- Comment in the JoS Forum ( )
+%
+"(God) is my favourite fictional character." - Homer Simpson
+
+ -- Matt Groening
+ -- The Simpsons ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Simpsons )
+%
+You should learn several new words everyday--eventually you will forget how to
+speak so others can understand you.
+
+Yaakov on Freenode's #perl
+
+ -- Yaakov
+ -- Freenode's #perl Conversation.
+%
+For thousands of years, we have been plagued by mathematicians insisting that
+two plus two equals four. Who elected them? I, Stevie-O, am promoting an
+entirely new system, where two plus two equals FIVE. Eventually, it will be
+extended to provide other stuff these power-hungry madmen kept hidden away for
+themselves, such as division by zero, cold fusion, the ability to solve the
+halting problem, and the secret to attracting hot chicks.
+
+Stevie-O on the Acme::NewMath POD document.
+[Acme-NewMath](http://search.cpan.org/dist/Acme-NewMath/)
+
+ -- Stevie-O
+ -- Acme::NewMath POD document ( http://search.cpan.org/dist/Acme-NewMath/ )
+%
+> Should Perl do the same? [= Drop SCO Support]
+
+Absolutely not. Perl supports defunct operating systems, buggy operating
+systems, commercial operating systems, and poorly marketed operating systems.
+It would be inappropriate to drop SCO just because it happens to be all of the
+above.
+
+ -- Kurt Starsinic
+ -- advocacy@perl.org Email ( )
+%
+ <jkauffman> Lynx_: you do seem to do a lot of climbing
+ <jkauffman> Lynx_: you'll have the last laugh when the apocalypse comes
+ <jkauffman> you'll be physically fit
+ <jkauffman> climbing over the mountains of sulfurous ash
+ <jkauffman> bounding over rivers of lava
+ <Lynx_> sounds great
+ <Lynx_> but what will i eat?
+ <jkauffman> those who didn't bother to practice climbing
+ <Lynx_> eww
+ <Lynx_> those will be all fatty
+ <Lynx_> but maybe sulfurous ash is not so bad with some salt
+ <jkauffman> perhaps
+
+ -- Climbing for the Apocalypse
+ -- #perlcafe, Freenode
+%
+In Soviet Russia, every time you kill a kitten, god masturbates
+
+GyroTech on [a Slashdot
+comment](http://linux.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=195378&cid=16009070)
+
+ -- GyroTech
+ -- Slashdot Comment ( )
+%
+ <jagerman> dooky: A coworker used to like to say things like "I wrote
+ this much code" while holding his hands a couple feet apart
+ <mofino> hahaha
+ <jagerman> Once I asked him "At what font size?"
+ <mofino> +30
+ <q[ender]> hahah
+ <jagerman> He never said it any more
+
+ -- "I Wrote This Much Code"
+ -- #perlcafe, Freenode
+%
+Recently, Richard Stallman gave a speech in which he illustrated an academic
+point about programming history by quoting a guy who described vi as 'an
+editor spread at sword-point and which is really hard to use'.
+
+I think I speak for all moderate vi(m) users when I say -- DEATH and DAMNATION
+(in that order) to this Cardinal of the CTRL key! Needless to say my own local
+vim user group has dispatched assassins to kill Mr. Stallman, but this is
+hardly the end of the story. The fact is that a man has referred to another
+man who in turn expressed some often-voiced reservations about OUR EDITOR! On
+behalf of all editors of text everywhere, I implore EMACS users to return to
+the true path, lest you be burned at the stake and then go to hell, the Buffer
+From Which There Is No Unloading. We'll see how productive you are then, with
+your ctrl-meta-alt and your ELISP and your 'ring buffer', whatever THAT is.
+
+Peace and love to all.
+^C
+^X
+quit
+q
+QUIT
+exit :exit
+zz
+ZZ
+
+kahei on
+[Slashdot](http://linux.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=196931&cid=16136657)
+
+ -- kahei
+ -- Slashdot Comment ( )
+%
+The thing is, I don't actually enjoy debugging my own machines. I _much_
+prefer having other people debug _their_ machines, and fixing my machine in
+the process. So I didn't want just something that worked on the Mac Mini, I
+wanted something that works _universally_, so that hopefully people who are
+even crazier than me will waste _their_ time trying to get these machines
+working.
+
+Linus Torvalds in [an Email message](http://lwn.net/Articles/188123/)
+
+ -- Linus Torvalds
+ -- Email Message ( http://lwn.net/Articles/188123/ )
+%
+Re:Silly Iranians… ALWAYS!
+
+First, they came for the newspapers, and I did nothing because the Farsi Side
+comic was just re-prints now.
+
+Next, they came for the books, and I looked the other way because the Death to
+America Book of the Month Club was only recommending books to burn anyway.
+
+Then, they came for the Satellite Dishes, and I said nothing because I still
+had a year left on my Infidelphia Cable contract.
+
+Finally, they came for my Internet Service, and no one was left to hear my
+ululation!
+
+patrixmyth on
+[Slashdot](http://yro.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=201413&cid=16490111)
+
+ -- patrixmyth
+ -- Slashdot Comment ( )
+%
+I don't guarantee that I always change my mind, but I _can_ guarantee that if
+most of the people I trust tell me I'm a dick-head, I'll at least give it a
+passing thought.
+
+[ Chorus: "You're a dick-head, Linus" ]
+
+Linus Torvalds in [an E-mail message](http://lwn.net/Articles/201440/).
+
+ -- Linus Torvalds
+ -- Email Message ( http://lwn.net/Articles/201440/ )
+%
+Review of the Oxford English Dictionary on Amazon.com:
+
+[One Star]
+
+"an epic work that has trouble holding the interest"
+
+By: a customer
+
+I'm at the ABs, and I still can't get a grip on the plot. Characters enter,
+are introduced in exhausting detail -- and then disappear again! Very
+frustrating. The only time an old character shows up again is in another's
+history! A lot like _A Dance to the Music of Time_, I suppose.
+
+Perhaps things will become clearer when we meet Oxford, English or Dictionary
+-- clearly three key figures. Some kind of menage a trois?
+
+ -- Amazon.com: Oxford English Dictionary ( )
+%
+Although the contents of her book, The Virtue of Selfishness, are precisely
+accurate and widely integrated, Ayn Rand committed an error by distorting the
+word "selfishness" in fashioning a dramatic statement. The word "selfishness"
+does have valuable, precise denotations of "an irrational, harmful disregard
+for others". Rand could have strengthened her work by selecting accurate
+wording such as rational self-growth. Instead, she unnecessarily bent and
+undermined the precise, valuable meaning of selfishness. …As with
+selflessness, selfishness is a form of immature, destructive, irrational
+behavior -- a form of stupid behavior.
+
+[Neo-Tech Advantage No. 14 - "Self-Growth vs. Selfless
+View"](http://www.neo-tech.com/neotech/advantages/advantage14.html)
+
+ -- Frank R. Wallace
+ -- Neo-Tech Advantage No. 14 - "Self-Growth vs. Selfless View" ( )
+%
+I invented the term Object-Oriented, and I can tell you I did not have C++ in
+mind.
+
+Alan Kay (Attributed)
+
+ -- Alan Kay
+%
+Extra Peculiar
+
+Did you watch Uri Geller's show last night? He said that if anything
+extraordinary happened at home during the show, people should phone in, or
+report it at his website. During the entire show I was installing Hebrew
+Windows XP for my mother-in-law, and something extraordinary did happen. The
+operating system got installed, came up, ran without a glitch. Should I report
+this to Uri?
+
+khatul's comment:
+
+Without a glitch, huh? Apparently you (and Uri) managed to install Linux from
+a Windows XP installation CD. This is much more than telekinesis. It smells
+like pure alien intervention. Report immediately!
+
+ -- wildernesscat
+ -- wildernesscat : Extra Peculiar (Blog Entry) ( )
+%
+It's one of those rare "perfect" kernels. So if it doesn't happen to compile
+with your config (or it does compile, but then does unspeakable acts of
+perversion with your pet dachshund), you can rest easy knowing that it's all
+your own d*mn fault, and you should just fix your evil ways.
+
+You could send me and the kernel mailing list a note about it anyway, of
+course. (And perhaps pictures, if your dachshund is involved. Not that we'd be
+interested, of course. No. Just so that we'd know to avoid it next time).
+
+Linus Torvalds announcing the 2.6.19 Linux kernel.
+[Email message](http://lwn.net/Articles/211904/)
+
+ -- Linus Torvalds
+ -- Email Message ( http://lwn.net/Articles/211904/ )
+%
+ <castoff> merlyn: is it true that array iteration is better performance
+ wise than hash iteration?
+ * avar would guess that array iter is faster than hash iter
+ <merlyn> what is "hash iter"?
+ <merlyn> with "each()"?
+ <castoff> foreach key…
+ <avar> yeah, or keys
+ <merlyn> I don't see those as comparable
+ <merlyn> when you have a hash, and you need to iterate, you do.
+ <merlyn> when you have an array, and you need to iterate, you do
+ <merlyn> what is there to choose between?
+ <castoff> the hash has no real value stored other than the key so i
+ converted to arrays
+ <avar> merlyn: you can compare the speed of the two operations
+ <avar> well duh
+ <merlyn> Why would you compare the speed of unrelated events?
+ <merlyn> "let's time baking this bread compared to driving to seattle"
+ <merlyn> it's pointless
+ <ides> merlyn: heh, yes, but I think it would make a funny
+ performance comparison article! :)
+ <merlyn> "always optimize for baking bread!"
+ * avar eats merlyn
+ <ides> merlyn: I was thinking more along the lines of "Performance
+ comparison on Perl vs RoR vs Ice Fishing"
+ <merlyn> "I repeated baking bread 5000 times to get the average"
+ <merlyn> "It took me six years"
+ <ides> merlyn: too bad there isn't a Benchmark module for my oven…
+ <merlyn> Ovenmark
+
+ -- Not comparable
+ -- #perl, Freenode
+%
+ <Teratogen> Two atoms are walking down the street when one of them says
+ "I think I've lost an electron." The second one says "are
+ you sure?", to which the first one replies "Yes, I'm
+ positive".
+ <mpeg4codec> So officer Schroedinger pulls over this quantum particle
+ and he says ``Do you know how fast you were going?''
+ <mpeg4codec> the particle says, ``No, but I know exactly where I am.''
+ <Teratogen> everybody has heard of Schroedinger's cat experiment
+ <Teratogen> but very few people know that Schroedinger hated cats
+ <Teratogen> with a passion
+ <Teratogen> and actually experimented on them
+ <Teratogen> he even owned a set of cat-fur gloves
+ <Teratogen> cats mysteriously disappeared around Schroedinger's
+ laboratory
+ <Teratogen> and there was no Chinese restaurant close by to explain the
+ disappearances
+ <mpeg4codec> Schroedinger's cat: wanted dead AND alive
+
+ -- Jokes about Particle Physics
+ -- #perl, Freenode
+%
+Tel Aviv - a functional definition:
+
+Free parking space free space.
+
+Shachar Shemesh
+[Blog Post](http://blog.shemesh.biz/?p=435)
+
+ -- Shachar Shemesh
+ -- "Tel Aviv - a Functional Definition" (Blog Post) ( )
+%
+ <Botje> tecloSolaris: that's an irssi script. you can't run it
+ outside irssi.
+ <tecloSolaris> but it fails in irssi
+ <Botje> why does it fail?
+ <merlyn> it fails because of its parents!
+ <merlyn> I blame its parents
+ <merlyn> It fails because of society.
+ <merlyn> it fails as a fundamental shortcoming of Perl
+ <merlyn> it fails at succeeding
+ <Teratogen> I blame society!
+ <merlyn> I blame Teratogen's society.
+ <merlyn> I'll blame the blamer
+
+ -- Always find someone to blame
+ -- #perl, Freenode
+%
+In a widely anticipated move, Linux "headcase" Torvalds today announced the
+immediate availability of the most advanced Linux kernel to date, version
+2.6.20.
+
+Before downloading the actual new kernel, most avid kernel hackers have been
+involved in a 2-hour pre-kernel-compilation count-down, with some even
+spending the preceding week doing typing exercises and reciting PI to a
+thousand decimal places.
+
+The half-time entertainment is provided by randomly inserted trivial syntax
+errors that nerds are expected to fix at home before completing the compile,
+but most people actually seem to mostly enjoy watching the compile warnings,
+sponsored by Anheuser-Busch, scroll past.
+
+As ICD head analyst Walter Dickweed put it: "Releasing a new kernel on
+Superbowl Sunday means that the important 'pasty white nerd' constituency
+finally has something to do while the rest of the country sits comatose in
+front of their 65" plasma screens".
+
+Walter was immediately attacked for his racist and insensitive remarks by
+Geeks without Borders representative Marilyn vos Savant, who pointed out that
+not all of their members are either pasty nor white. "Some of them even
+shower!" she added, claiming that the constant stereotyping hurts nerds'
+standing in society.
+
+Geeks outside the US were just confused about the whole issue, and were heard
+wondering what the big hoopla was all about. Some of the more culturally aware
+of them were heard snickering about balls that weren't even round.
+
+-- Linus Torvalds announcing kernel 2.6.20 ( http://lwn.net/Articles/220544/ )
+
+ -- Linus Torvalds
+ -- Announcement of Kernel 2.6.20 ( http://lwn.net/Articles/220544/ )
+%
+Sesquipedallianism:
+
+Making excessive use of long words.
+
+http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=sesquipedallian
+
+ -- Definition for Sesquipedallian ( )
+%
+ <TimToady> TimToady's Lament: The pain in reign falls mainly in the
+ 'splain. --
+
+ -- TimToady's Lament
+ -- #perl6, Freenode
+%
+You fool. Why did you tell him the Spanish Inquisition is coming. Now he's
+going to expect it.
+
+niconorsk on a [Slashdot
+Comment](http://politics.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=224312&cid=18164404)
+
+ -- niconorsk
+ -- Slashdot Comment ( )
+%
+From the Beowulf Cluster FAQ:
+
+11. Should I build a cluster of these 100 386s? [1999-05-13]
+
+If it's OK with you that it'll be slower than a single Celeron-333 machine,
+sure. Great way to learn.
+
+ -- Beowulf mailing list FAQ ( )
+%
+ * f00li5h installs q-mail
+ * dazjorz installs f00li5h
+ * Zaba installs dazjorz
+ <jeeger> qmail installs f00li5h
+ <jeeger> In soviet russia …
+ <jeeger> Software installs YOU!
+ * dazjorz rm -rf zaba
+ * f00li5h is in Soviet Australia
+
+ -- Are you being installed?
+ -- #perl, Freenode
+%
+That's me in the corner.
+That's me in the spotlight.
+Losing my abstraction.
+
+Trying to keep my point of view…
+And I don't know if I can do it.
+Oh no, I code too much.
+Haven't debugged enough.
+
+Is that why I heard you laughing?
+I thought that I heard you ping.
+I think I thought I saw you reply.
+
+ -- Andy Armstrong and Randal L. Schwartz
+ -- Perl module-authors post ( )
+%
+Slashdot Comment on Reasons to or not to use MySQL:
+
+A nice flame war. I'm just going to sit back, crack a beer and enjoy it. It is
+almost memorial day weekend, you know. Hopefully it get hot enough in here to
+roast a hot dog.
+
+Oh goody! I'll help get things going:
+
+* * MySQL users will have to wait until you are done with the fire before they
+can roast their hot dogs, since MySQL is not a real database and does not
+support concurrent roasting;
+
+* * I've read the PostgreSQL manual eight times and still can't figure out
+something as bloody simple as roasting a hot dog, though I did figure out I
+have to call VACUUM before I can apply ketchup;
+
+* * Serious enterprises who care about their hot dogs use Oracle, since you
+can roast over 10,000 dogs at once and optionally impart the taste of filet
+mignon;
+
+* * If you try to roast a footlong hotdog using MySQL it will silently
+truncate it to regular size, causing your child to cry;
+
+* * Oracle will sue you if you complain about the difficulty of starting your
+fire or the blackened taste of the dogs;
+
+* * With SQLite your hot dogs are pre-roasted;
+
+* * Last year on Memorial Day, mysqld leapt out of my MacBook Pro and pushed
+my cousin into the fire, resulting in third degree burns. And also it causes
+cancer. And terrorism. Blindness. Violent puppy death. BOO! MYSQL IS SCARY
+DON'T USE MYSQL!!
+
+http://developers.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=236249&cid=19275875
+
+ -- Slashdot Comment ( )
+%
+Max Rabkin's description for his entry is better than anything I could come up
+with:
+
+"Calculator 2.0 is an enterprise-level client-side numerical productivity
+suite. It leverages proven technologies to provide a clear and user-friendly
+interface to a rich set of efficient and powerful components. It is powered by
+an XML database."
+
+[OMGWTF Highlights #2: Misc. (The Daily
+WTF)](http://thedailywtf.com/Articles/OMGWTF-Highlights-2-Misc.aspx)
+
+ -- OMGWTF Highlights #2: Misc. (The Daily WTF) ( )
+%
+I think this is the idea behind dual core: 1 core belongs to microsoft, 1 core
+for you.
+
+-- sucati on [a Slashdot
+comment](http://yro.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=244291&cid=19718695)
+
+No. All your core are belong to us.
+
+-- geobeck [in
+response](http://yro.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=244291&cid=19722737).
+
+ -- Slashdot Comments ( )
+%
+Eye have a spelling chequer
+It came with my pea sea
+It plainly marques four my revue
+Miss steaks eye kin knot sea.
+Eye strike a key and type a word
+And weight four it two say
+Weather eye am wrong oar write.
+It shows me strait a weigh.
+As soon as a mist ache is maid
+It nose bee fore two long
+and eye can put the error rite.
+Its rare lea ever wrong.
+Eye have run this poem threw it
+I am shore your pleased two no
+Its letter perfect awl the weigh
+My chequer tolled me sew.
+
+ -- Spell Chequer ( )
+%
+Oh no, here we go again..
+
+"Linus just made the kernel; it's irritating when he gets credit for Linux"
+
+"Yeah, but at least he made the Kernel -- Gates just made the Basic compiler"
+
+"That's news to me - have you ever heard of this guy called Paul Allen?"
+
+"Doesn't matter - personally I think the Linux kernel isn't all that - I use
+BSD"
+
+"Screw Linus -- he was wrong about BitKeeper and Tivo so he's wrong about MS &
+Novell"
+
+"Yeah, well at least he's not a convicted monopolist"
+
+"Yeah, until M$ stops treating me like a criminal I refuse to buy their
+software"
+
+Also insert random quotes and mis-quotes such as: "When Microsoft writes an
+application for Linux, I've Won." - Linus Torvalds "640kb ought to be enough
+for everybody" - Bill Gates
+
+That about cover it? Can we have a non-childish discussion now? If there's any
+other slime to be thrown, just reply to this post -- let's keep the forum
+clean for an actual discussion.
+
+[Slashdot
+comment](http://linux.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=267393&cid=20200075)
+
+ -- dhavleak
+ -- Slashdot Comment ( )
+%
+ <masak> this definitely gives a more solid feel for kp6
+ <masak> kudos to whomever set exp_evalbot up!
+ <moritz_> masak: that was me ;)
+ <masak> moritz_: kudos
+ <masak> moritz_++
+ <spinclad> moritz_++
+ <fglock> moritz++ :)
+ <masak> moritz_++ # the best thing about karma is that it's free
+ <masak> moritz++ # oh right
+ <moritz_> thanks
+ <moritz_> "karma is like software - it's better when it's free" ;-)
+
+ -- Free Karma
+ -- #perl6, Freenode
+%
+ <talexb> Wow, I've won 4M pounds sterling, and all I have to do is
+ contact someone in Zambia for more information. What could
+ possibly go wrong?
+ <rindolf> talexb: heh.
+ <jagerman> Wait, I thought *I* won that.
+ <talexb> rindolf, Can't believe people still fall for that line ..
+ <fwiles> damn, wish I would win something… I just seem to be
+ pre-approved for about $13 billion worth of home loans
+ <talexb> Oops, sorry jagerman .. I'm already faxing this lady my Power
+ of Attorney!!!
+ <talexb> fwiles, Oh, that'll buy you a nice semi in Toronto.
+ <jagerman> talexb: Oh, I'm way ahead of you then. I'm flying there to
+ meet with "government officials."
+ <jagerman> I'm paying for it myself, of course, since I'll be rich once
+ they transfer the money to me.
+ <talexb> jagerman, Rats! Hey, I know a couple of lawyers if you need
+ 'em .. very trustworthy, share some office space with some
+ barbers.
+
+ -- Getting Rich Easily
+ -- #perl, Freenode
+%
+Poetical sing-song or hypnotically rhythmic meter are often found in the
+rhetoric of dictators, evangelists, sibyls, politicians, theologians,
+mountebanks, social "intellectuals", media men, medicine men, hallucinating
+psychotics, chanting shiites, and screaming terrorists. Consider how millions
+of normally rational Germans thrilled and responded to the poetical cadence
+and charisma of the consummate altruist neocheater, Adolph Hitler. The
+results: a reign of destruction with tens of millions of human beings
+slaughtered so one impotent man could indulge his mysticism to feel unearned
+power. All that slaughter was for nothing more than to let one neocheater feel
+a pseudo self-esteem. …Twenty million dead so one pip-squeak could feel big
+and important.
+
+"So what!" cry the mystics as the lifetime efforts of a thousand productive,
+innocent individuals are blown to bits every day without a backward glance. So
+what if the troops roll across the country with military cadence and guns
+ablaze. So what if they level town after town, reducing to rubble and corpses
+all the values, beauty, and life that took generations of productive effort to
+build.
+
+And that is all the chanting religious automatons or splendid Panzer divisions
+know how to do -- to destroy in a moment, without a thought, all the values
+that producers labored for lifetimes to build. Chanting mobs or marching
+troops never glance back, never think for a moment of the death and
+destruction they leave behind. So what! the mystics and neocheaters cry. So
+what if genocide happens in Russia, Nazi Germany, Cuba, Cambodia, Red China,
+or in our land. "I don't want to hear it! To hell with the lifetime efforts of
+productive individuals! …Save the snail darter!"
+
+Neo-Tech Advantage No. 104
+
+ -- Frank R. Wallace
+ -- Neo-Tech Advantage No. 104 ( )
+%
+> > > Ah, understood. I was stuck with Outlook at my last job, and it was
+> > > impossible to get it to quote a message in a way that you could
+> > > actually reply to things point by point. It seemed optimized for
+> > > sending a message to every person in the company and making all of
+> > > your text blue. What a fucking joke.
+> >
+> > If it's a joke you should use Comic Sans so everyone /knows/ it's
+> > funny.
+>
+> No no, Comic Sans is for presentations to the shareholders!
+
+Somebody who is presenting to shareholders knows how to change the
+default font?
+
+Weird…
+
+ -- Jonathan Rockway, Andy Armstrong, Jonathan Rockway, and Adrian Howard
+ -- Perl Module Authors Post ( )
+%
+Geez…get any 10 lawyers together, one will be a real decent person, the other
+nine will be total asshats.
+
+[Slashdot
+Comment](http://yro.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=332831&cid=21033847)
+
+It just appears that way because it's logarithmic. 100 lawyers will net you 2
+good ones, 1000 lawyers 3 good ones and so forth.
+
+[Slashdot
+comment](http://yro.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=332831&cid=21035649)
+
+ -- Slashdot Comment ( )
+%
+What *would* Jesus do?
+
+Oh my god.
+
+[
+
+"They felt Jesus would not have approved of copyright breaches."
+
+Jesus, you da man! Stick it to those kids!
+
+You might be interested to note that the students had studied "Exodus 20:15 -
+you shall not steal" which comes a little way before Jesus anyway. Wasn't the
+whole point of Jesus coming to make the "new commandment" that people "love
+one another as I have loved you" and to annul the previous commandments that
+were given to Moses? I was raised Christian and was Christian for a long time
+but now am not, but I can't quite remember the specifics of this point.
+
+Anyway, the point is that Jesus probably would have told them to stick Exodus
+to the man and just get on with the lovin'. Or something.
+
+liedra in [a blog post](http://liedra.livejournal.com/21176.html).
+
+ -- liedra
+ -- Blog Post ( http://liedra.livejournal.com/21176.html )
+%
+ <LeoNerd> defc0n-: Make sure to use a nice tight knot, so your joined
+ thread doesn't fall apart
+ <Somni> thread jokes, how droll
+ * LeoNerd grins "I have a whole stack of them waiting here.."
+ <defc0n-> C jokes are worse, a la if (malloc(sizeof(yourmom_t)) ==
+ NULL) printf("error: mom too fat\n");
+ <idiotben> joke? hell that’s good logic! =P Your
+ <idiotben> Your momma so fat, the bitch needs PAE to fit in memory w/o
+ using up swap
+ <idiotben> yo momma so fat, your dad has to run RHEL4's "hugemem" kernel
+ <idiotben> your mom is sooooo fat! everyone she comes in contact with
+ has a buffer overflow!
+ <LeoNerd> … she needs 64k cluster size?
+ <LeoNerd> (going for a combined fat/FAT joke there)
+
+ -- Geeky "Your Momma's So Fat" Jokes
+ -- #perl, Freenode
+%
+Michael Frame:
+
+<<<
+
+Managed C++… there’s a pile of hate. Let’s take all the complexity and bad
+design in C++, and throw away the speed and efficiency by compiling it to .NET
+interpreted pseudocode instead. Microsoft has such great ideas when it comes
+to languages.
+
+>>>
+
+To which in reply, Yossi Kreinin:
+
+<<<
+
+What’s there not to like with C++/CLI? You can have macros expanding to
+templates from which generics are generated, and then have classes generated
+from the generics. And these classes can have a close function and two
+destructors, and hold references to unmanaged pointers to managed pointers!
+With C++, you only have duplicate features, but with C++/CLI, you can finally
+have triplicate ones! You see, this is a language for an expert. Experts love
+having 3 different ways to do things, each broken in its own way.
+
+>>>
+
+ -- use.perl.org Blog Post ( http://use.perl.org/~Aristotle/journal/34740 )
+%
+I think you'll find that the [Windows] Desktop Search is completely
+inseparable from the desktop and that the latter would be rendered completely
+useless if it is uninstalled. Just like IE is.
+
+speaker of the truth in
+
+
+ -- speaker of the truth
+ -- Slashdot Comment ( )
+%
+A mouse is a device used to point at the xterm you want to type in.
+
+ -- Unknown
+ -- alt.sysadmin.recovery ( )
+%
+Apart from the fact that I congratulate you for writing bugless software
+without peer review, I also congratulate you for being able to write a fully
+RFC compliant MLM that won't blow up when you receive input you didn't account
+for.
+
+Quite frankly, even a crappy sysadmin can get a reasonable mailman setup
+working (including nice archiving), quicker than the best coder can rewrite a
+full MLM from scratch. And you still have time left over to modify/fix/improve
+mailman to do the few things it didn't do quite right for you.
+
+But if your attitude to coding is "I'd rather rewrite all this than soiling my
+eyes and hands looking at someone else's code", that's not a very good way to
+get hired anywhere as a coder, and even if you are super brilliant, you end up
+being a DJB that people snicker at with "that guy thinks he's so bright that
+he had to write his own libc" (instead of fixing/wrapping the few problematic
+pieces of them, and in the case of reasonable maintainers, contributing the
+code back).
+
+ -- Marc Merlin
+ -- linux-elitists blog post ( )
+%
+We're not just doing it for money…We're doing it for a shitload of money!
+
+Excerpt from Spaceballs
+
+ -- Mel Brooks
+ -- Spaceballs ( http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0094012/ )
+%
+ <asarch> Is there any web application framework for Perl? Something
+ ala Ruby on Rails
+ <integral> asarch: Jifty and Catalyst and lots more!
+ <archon-> asarch: catalyst
+ <integral> for example CGI::Application.
+ <Yaakov> asarch: Perl on Pontoons.
+ <integral> Jifty is closer to Rails than Catalyst is
+ <integral> Catalyst is like Lego, Jifty is like that not-Lego stuff that
+ sucks :-)
+ <asarch> Thanks Yaakov
+ <asarch> Let me see…
+ <Yaakov> I WAS LYING
+ <Yaakov> THERE ARE NO PONTOONS
+ <integral> Why can't you just use Rails? Too slow? Too crap?
+ <asarch> lol :-D
+ <Yaakov> Ruby on Rails will always seem like Ruby on Crack to me,
+ thanks to that promotional video…
+ <integral> Haskell on Highways
+ <Yaakov> Logo on Logs
+ <Yaakov> PHP on PCP
+ <integral> BCPL on Boats
+ <integral> They should bring back BCPL
+ <Yaakov> JCL on Jets
+ <anno-> cobol on cobbles
+ <Yaakov> Algol on Airplanes
+ <Yaakov> Snobol on Snowmobiles
+ <Yaakov> Ada on Armored Transports
+
+ -- %s on %s
+ -- #perl, Freenode
+%
+Slashdot Response to "BBC Creates 'Perl on Rails'":
+
+This is proof that there is a conspiracy to make up absurd programming
+shenanigans to sell overpriced door stoppers! Coming soon…
+
+* "Perl on Rails for Dummies"
+
+* "Perl on Rails for Idiots"
+
+* "Perl on Rails Bible"
+
+* "Perl on Rails in 24 Hours"
+
+* "Perl on Rails in a Nutshell"
+
+* "Perl on Rails: The Missing Manual"
+
+…at a bookstore near you to burn a hole in your wallet!
+
+ -- creimer
+ -- Slashdot Comment ( )
+%
+Among the generalists, the conventional wisdom is that the worse-is-better
+approach is more adaptive. Personally, I get a little tired of the argument:
+My worse-is-better is better than your worse-is-better because I'm better at
+being worser! Is it really true that the worse-is-better approach always wins?
+With Perl 6 we're trying to sneak one better-is-better cycle in there and hope
+to come out ahead before reverting to the tried and true worse-is-better
+approach. Whether that works, only time will tell.
+
+Larry Wall in "State of the Onion 11"
+http://www.perl.com/pub/a/2007/12/06/soto-11.html?page=3
+
+ -- Larry Wall
+ -- State of the Onion 11 ( )
+%
+ <ew73> I have discovered another benefit to the unemployed status!
+ <ew73> I can cook whenever I want.
+ <sili> ew73: cooking with… imagination?
+ <ew73> sili: I'm actually quite good at teh cookingz.
+ <sili> ew73: ARE YOU GOOD PROGRAMMAR 2/
+ <ew73> no :(
+ <sili> I guess that explains why you're unemployed :p
+ <ew73> That was mean!
+ <sili> it's not like I stole your bike
+ <ew73> That also would be mean.
+ <phroggy> good cooking impresses the ladies a lot more than good
+ programming.
+ <utopia_> depends on the lady
+ <phroggy> (any present female company excepted, of course)
+ <jdv79> phroggy: except when you don't have any money
+ <ew73> phroggy: But imagine, a good cook AND a good programmer.
+ <sili> I can cook some stuff.
+ <phroggy> jdv79: yeah, that nixes the deal. I have that problem too.
+ <jdv79> its a start
+ <ew73> "Here's my recipe for mushroom stir-fry. And HERE's the source
+ for my nutritional database system."
+ <phroggy> haha
+ <jim> ew73: so when you load the data model, do you get the recipe
+ free?
+ <ew73> jim: Geek.
+ * jim looks around…
+ <jim> like yer any different :)
+
+ -- Too many Freenode #perl cooks.
+ -- #perl, Freenode
+%
+ --> FilipeMendes has joined #perl
+ <FilipeMendes> any way to avoid having users running perl? I need
+ specify who can or who can not
+ <dondelelcaro> FilipeMendes: uh… why?
+ <FilipeMendes> security purposes
+ <mauke> haha
+ <mauke> chmod 0 /usr/bin/perl
+ <dondelelcaro> question repeated, with more emphasis and incredulity
+ <FilipeMendes> i want specify some users
+ <Caelum> FilipeMendes: why would you not want users running perl?
+ <FilipeMendes> chmod wouldnt be useful
+ <dkr> FilipeMendes: chmod 750 /usr/bin/perl; chgrp leet
+ /usr/bin/perl; and put the leet people in that group ?
+ <FilipeMendes> hmmm
+ <dondelelcaro> you realize that any user who wants can just stick their
+ own perl executable there?
+ <go|dfish> FilipeMendes: ACL , maybe.
+ <dkr> also your system scripts might rely on it
+ <dondelelcaro> (and probably all of the users actually end up using
+ perl?)
+ <dkr> modify the perl code to have it exit based on checking a
+ uid whitelist. :)
+ <dkr> change the name to something obscure only the cool people
+ know
+ <mauke> _perl
+ <dkr> realize that removing tools does not remove abilities and
+ give up
+ <mauke> the _ means it's private!
+ <dkr> mauke: :D
+
+ -- Security by perl-deprivation
+ -- #perl, Freenode
+%
+It was 20 years ago today
+Larry Wall taught some text to play
+It's been going in & out of style
+But it's stuck around for quite a while()
+So may I introduce to you
+The tool you've loved for all these years
+Larry's Practical Extract & Report Laaaanguage
+
+It's Larry's Practical Extract Report Lang
+5.10 still has some bugs to fix
+Larry's Practical Extract Report Lang
+Don't ask for a date for version 6…
+
+http://perlbuzz.com/2007/12/it-was-twenty-years-ago-today.html
+on Perl's 20th Birthday
+
+ -- Andy Lester
+ -- Perl's 20th Birthday ( )
+%
+The regression list keeps shrinking, so we're still on track for a full 2.6.24
+release in early January. Assuming we don't all overeat during the holidays
+and nobody gets any work done. But we all know that the holidays are really
+the time when we get away from the boring "real work", and can spend 24/7 on
+kernel hacking instead, right?
+
+Here's to a merry christmas, doing the whole druidic festival around the tree
+thing.
+
+Linus Torvalds announcing Linux Kernel prepatch 2.6.24-rc6
+http://lwn.net/Articles/262978/
+
+ -- Linus Torvalds
+ -- Announcing Linux Kernel prepatch 2.6.24-rc6 ( )
+%
+<<<
+
+Some people, when confronted with a problem, think "I know, I'll use regular
+expressions." Now they have two problems.
+
+--Jamie Zawinski, in comp.lang.emacs
+
+>>>
+
+— OMouse in http://programming.reddit.com/info/1awnv/comments/c1axk7
+
+<<<
+
+Some people, when confronted with regular expressions, always think "I know,
+I'll paste that Jamie Zawinski quote, and people will think I'm clever!"
+
+These people have a problem.
+
+>>>
+
+— dmd in http://programming.reddit.com/info/1awnv/comments/c1axqc
+
+ -- dmd
+ -- Reddit Comment ( )
+%
+ <BinGOs> mst: doh.
+ <BinGOs> mst++ # thinking outside the box.
+ <dwu> mst++ # utterly destroying the box.
+ <Daveman> SELL THE BOX!
+ <dwu> CAPITALIST PIG!
+ <Daveman> :D
+
+ -- Boxing
+ -- #perl, Freenode
+%
+I have discovered that there are two types of command interfaces in the world
+of computing: good interfaces and user interfaces.
+
+Daniel J. Bernstein (DJB) in http://cr.yp.to/qmail/guarantee.html
+
+ -- Daniel J. Bernstein (DJB)
+ -- "The qmail security guarantee" ( http://cr.yp.to/qmail/guarantee.html )
+%
+Xeno's paradox is easily disproved in three steps:
+
+1. Get crossbow and bolt.
+
+2. Aim crossbow at Xeno.
+
+3. Fire.
+
+If the bolt moves to Xeno, then it is proved that movement is possible. Also,
+Xeno will be dead. Win win situation.
+
+ -- HUADPE
+ -- Slashdot Comment ( )
+%
+I bow down before you.
+
+I thought I had done some rather horrible things with gcc built-ins and
+macros, but I hereby hand over my crown to you.
+
+As my daughter would say: that patch fell out of the ugly tree, and hit every
+branch on the way down. Very impressive.
+
+ -- Linus Torvalds
+ -- Email ( http://lwn.net/Articles/266314/ )
+%
+Are you saying that this linux can run on a computer without windows
+underneath it, at all ? As in, without a boot disk, without any drivers, and
+without any services ?
+
+That sounds preposterous to me.
+
+If it were true (and I doubt it), then companies would be selling computers
+without a windows. This clearly is not happening, so there must be some error
+in your calculations. I hope you realise that windows is more than just Office
+? Its a whole system that runs the computer from start to finish, and that is
+a very difficult thing to acheive. A lot of people dont realise this.
+
+Microsoft just spent $9 billion and many years to create Vista, so it does not
+sound reasonable that some new alternative could just snap into existence
+overnight like that. It would take billions of dollars and a massive effort to
+achieve. IBM tried, and spent a huge amount of money developing OS/2 but could
+never keep up with Windows. Apple tried to create their own system for years,
+but finally gave up recently and moved to Intel and Microsoft.
+
+Its just not possible that a freeware like the Linux could be extended to the
+point where it runs the entire computer fron start to finish, without using
+some of the more critical parts of windows. Not possible.
+
+I think you need to re-examine your assumptions.
+
+ -- jerryleecooper
+ -- Talkback on ZDNet ( )
+%
+I mean really, after the first 6143569056076952107294386875907695350 times
+maybe it was worthy of a chuckle, but to keep on modding up this joke suggests
+some form of psychosis.
+
+Wait, I'll put this in a way that you mods can understand:
+
+1. go to slashdot
+
+2. find a story
+
+3. find a comment on that story
+
+4. post a tired, old, lame-ass joke for the 9 billionth time
+
+5. ???????
+
+6. GET MODDED UP!
+
+Ok, I followed the silly meme, where's my +5 Funny?
+
+ -- Anonymous Coward
+ -- Slashdot Comment ( )
+%
+Linux Genuine Advantage™ is an exciting and mandatory new way for you to place
+your computer under the remote control of an untrusted third party!
+
+According to an independent study conducted by some scientists, many users of
+Linux are running non-Genuine versions of their operating system. This puts
+them at the disadvantage of having their computers work normally, without
+periodically phoning home unannounced to see if it's OK for their computer to
+continue functioning. These users are also missing out on the Advantage of
+paying ongoing licensing fees to ensure their computer keeps operating
+properly.
+
+To remedy this, we have created a new program available as a required free
+download: Linux Genuine Advantage™!
+
+Finally! Linux users can experience a feature that until now remained the
+exclusive domain of proprietary software.
+
+Once you've installed Linux Genuine Advantage™, you'll want to register and
+send in your licensing fees to receive these important benefits:
+
+* Your computer, which worked just fine before, will continue functioning
+normally!
+
+* Our software which you just installed will not disable logins on your
+computer (as long as our license server keeps working properly)!
+
+* It's totally awesome! We might not raise the yearly licensing fees in the
+future!
+
+Plus, if you act now, we promise not to launch unfounded lawsuits against you,
+slander you or our competitors in the press and the courts (possibly by using
+other smaller companies as pawns), or require you to pay us for software you
+won't use on every new computer you buy!
+
+ -- Linux Genuine Advantage ( http://www.linuxgenuineadvantage.org/ )
+%
+Get the Linux Genuine Advantage!
+
+Did you wake up this morning and say "I wish someone would figure out a way to
+let me do less with my computer"? You've come to the right place!
+
+ -- Linux Genuine Advantage ( http://www.linuxgenuineadvantage.org/ )
+%
+08/25/2007 - The Windows Genuine Advantage servers went down worldwide,
+marking any Windows machines as pirated during Microsoft's server outage.
+Meanwhile, the Linux Genuine Advantage™ activation server was up the whole
+time. Truly another victory for Open Source software! Microsoft, contact us if
+you'd like to license Linux Genuine Advantage™, we'd love to enter into a
+lucrative licensing agreement. With the money you save, you could put the WGA
+programmers onto other tasks, like improving Vista!
+
+02/03/2007 - The Linux Genuine Advantage™ crack is spreading! Someone uploaded
+it to The Pirate Bay! Looks like it's time to get more involved in Swedish
+politics from across the globe!
+
+02/02/2007 - Linux Genuine Advantage™ has been cracked by computer hackers!
+Rather than improving our software, we'll be sending our team of intimidating
+lawyers to pay them a visit.
+
+ -- Linux Genuine Advantage ( http://www.linuxgenuineadvantage.org/ )
+%
+So I'd like to start off with my own irrationalities.
+
+I don't think syntax should dangle in the wind. I'm with Aristotle. I think
+things should have a beginning, a middle, and an end. Which means I like K&R
+bracketing. I do not like the way that Python hangs stuff out there, with no
+end.
+
+I think that ordinary people dislike abstraction. That's because I dislike
+abstraction and I think I'm ordinary. (laughter) I might be wrong about that,
+but I don't know.
+
+I simultaneously believe that languages are wonderful and awful. You have to
+hold both of those. Ugly things can be beautiful. And beautiful can get ugly
+very fast. You know, take Lisp. You know, it's the most beautiful language in
+the world. At least up until Haskell came along. (laughter) But, you know,
+every program in Lisp is just ugly. I don't figure how that works.
+
+I think visual metaphors are very important. How it looks. Different things
+should look different. Similar things should look similar. A language designer
+simultaneously has to care what other people think, and has to not care what
+other people think. Otherwise you go crazy. Well, crazier. (laughter)
+
+And finally, I think God has free will. And therefore he created programmers
+with free will and that they ought to be given choices.
+
+ -- Larry Wall
+ -- Present Continuous, Future Perfect ( )
+%
+Now, I'm not the only language designer with irrationalities. You can think of
+some languages to go with some of these things.
+
+* "We've got to start over from scratch" - Well, that's almost any academic
+language you find.
+
+* "English phrases" - Well that's Cobol. You know, cargo cult English.
+(laughter)
+
+* "Text processing doesn't matter much" - Fortran.
+
+* "Simple languages produce simple solutions" - C.
+
+* "If I wanted it fast, I'd write it in C" - That's almost a direct quote from
+the original awk page.
+
+* "I thought of a way to do it so it must be right" - That's obviously PHP.
+(laughter and applause)
+
+* "You can build anything with NAND gates" - Any language designed by an
+electrical engineer. (laughter)
+
+* "This is a very high level language, who cares about bits?" - The entire
+scope of fourth generation languages fell into this… problem.
+
+* "Users care about elegance" - A lot of languages from Europe tend to fall
+into this. You know, Eiffel.
+
+* "The specification is good enough" - Ada.
+
+* "Abstraction equals usability" - Scheme. Things like that.
+
+* "The common kernel should be as small as possible" - Forth.
+
+* "Let's make this easy for the computer" - Lisp. (laughter)
+
+* "Most programs are designed top-down" - Pascal. (laughter)
+
+* "Everything is a vector" - APL.
+
+* "Everything is an object" - Smalltalk and its children. (whispered:) Ruby.
+(laughter)
+
+* "Everything is a hypothesis" - Prolog. (laughter)
+
+* "Everything is a function" - Haskell. (laughter)
+
+* "Programmers should never have been given free will" - Obviously, Python.
+(laughter)
+
+So my psychological conjecture is that normal people, if they perceive that a
+computer language is forcing them to learn theory, they won't like it. In
+other words, hide the fancy stuff. It can be there, just hide it.
+
+ -- Larry Wall
+ -- Present Continuous, Future Perfect ( )
+%
+Back to dimensionality. When you are saying something linguistically, it's
+like taking a trip. You know, when you take a trip from California to Netanya,
+you don't go straight south and then straight west and then straight north.
+It's not orthogonal. There are little bits at the beginning. Then you take
+bigger hops on the planes and then you take littler hops at the end. Language
+works the same way, it's fractal. There is little orthogonality. At least
+apparently; you can have orthogonal views of it, there are orthogonal subsets.
+But there are multiple orthogonal subsets. At first glance it just looks like
+a network, and you have to navigate the geography.
+
+ -- Larry Wall
+ -- Present Continuous, Future Perfect ( )
+%
+Now in terms of the anthropology we try to welcome people into the tribe. We
+allow people to have their own little fiefdoms, where they are the ruler and
+can beat up on their followers.
+
+We try to let people share with each other. We try to capture knowledge. Both
+of those things are why we have the CPAN, Comprehensive Perl Archive Network,
+which is arguably one of the greatest repositories of reusable crappy software
+in the world. (laughter).
+
+And we have a culture of cooperating with other cultures too. We try to make
+Parrot so that other languages can ran on top of that. We've always tried to
+hook up Perl with everything. In kind of a humble sort of way. And finally
+it's culture of fun. At least we try to make it that way. And that's why I
+give weird talks.
+
+ -- Larry Wall
+ -- Present Continuous, Future Perfect ( )
+%
+«had been responsible for the 'production and distribution of more than 90
+percent of the high-quality counterfeit Microsoft software products.»
+
+Why doesn't MSFT sell these "high-quality" products instead of the crap
+they've been selling us for years.
+
+ -- boguslinks
+ -- Slashdot Comment ( )
+%
+ <x86> can someone tell me what this epoch translates to in %Y-%m-%d
+ format? 1202256000
+ <integral> eval: POSIX::strftime("%Y-%m-%d", gmtime(1202256000))
+ <buubot> integral: 2008-02-06
+ <x86> nice!
+ <integral> note that if you're not specifying timezone you're in for a
+ world of hate
+ <integral> err, *pain
+ <iank> s/pain/butter/
+ <iank> I will dump butter on you unless you specify tz.
+ <iank> Also if you do specify tz.
+ <iank> Fuck it, I will dump butter on you, fullstop.
+ <integral> don't waste good butter on them, try margarine
+
+ -- Timezone'd
+ -- #perl, Freenode
+%
+ <x86> gah
+ <x86> DateTime::Format::Strptime is not one of the core
+ modules
+ <iank> boo hoo cpan it
+ <apeiron> "i (can't|don't want to) use external modules"
+ <iank> (If only we had some sort of comprehensive archive
+ network.. for perl stuff.. complete with a convenient
+ tool you could use to easily fetch, build, and install
+ modules!)
+ <iank> apeiron: "oh, but you're a dumbass"
+ <iank> "carry on then"
+ <simcop2387-lab> iank! I know I'll call it Ruby on Rails!
+ <integral> well, it'd be different if CPAN and CPANPLUS really
+ were convenient.
+ <x86> POSIX::strptime is not a core module either
+ <x86> this sucks
+ <apeiron> Send patches or shut up. :)
+ <iank> CPAN IS VERY FUCKING CONVENIENT DO YOU WANT ME TO PUNCH
+ YOU IN THE SPLEEN
+ <integral> apt-get : cpan :: brilliant : annoying
+ <iank> this : pretentious and awkward :: 1 : 1
+ <x86> iank: not so conveinent when you're writing software to
+ be deployed on 100 servers and you dont want to have to
+ install the same module 100 times
+ <integral> bundle it with your app.
+ <iank> x86: stop failing at sysadmining
+ <iank> Or that.
+ <integral> They're also pure-perl so this is very, very trivial.
+ <integral> We have PARs which are jsut like Java's JARs for even
+ more deployability win
+ <iank> woohoo
+ <mst> and people have this retarded obsession with only using
+ core
+ <mst> I mean, anybody who does perl for a living grows out of
+ it pretty fucking fast
+ <mst> but there's always colossal whining the first time you
+ tell someone to get something from CPAN
+ <integral> But due to my last point, PAR isn't as well known as it
+ should be
+ <mst> x86: thanks for being today's example :)
+
+ -- CPAN is your Friend (or Enemy)
+ -- #perl, Freenode
+%
+ <mrmccrac-> GumbyBRAIN: who is man bear pig?
+ <GumbyBRAIN> Man i need to get a modification of a fried pig and eating
+ without my hands wouldn't be "too much bacon" for me; i
+ don't know what @inc is?
+ <iank> mrmccrac-: he is half man, and half bearpig.
+ * shaldannon is half man, half asleep
+ <iank> Half ass leap?
+ <iank> What's a leap?
+ * shaldannon stabs iank
+ <iank> oof
+ * iank punches shaldannon
+ * shaldannon kicks iank in the groin
+ * iank passes out from the pain
+
+ -- As long as you don't resort to violence
+ -- #perl, Freenode
+%
+If choice of syntax were the main factor of the maintainability of existing
+code, wouldn't the comment mantra be "Comment what you're doing, not why"?
+
+You can look up syntax in the language's documentation.
+
+ -- chromatic
+ -- Choice of Syntax ( http://use.perl.org/~chromatic/journal/35625 )
+%
+I don't have many examples where the author really blew it, because I try not
+to answer those questions. I figure that even if I don't, someone else will
+come along and say ``Because you can't just make shit up and expect the
+computer to magically know what you mean, Retardo!''. And even if nobody does
+come along and say this, that's not a bad thing.
+
+ -- Mark Jason Dominus
+ -- "More about How to Ask a Good Question" ( )
+%
+Q: How many hardware engineers does it take to replace a lightbulb?
+
+A: None! We'll fix it in software.
+
+ -- Unknown Author
+ -- Lightbulb Jokes - Computers ( )
+%
+When the first caveman programmer chiseled the first program on the walls of
+the first cave computer, it was a program to paint the string `Hello, world'
+in Antelope pictures. Roman programming textbooks began with the `Salut,
+Mundi' program. I don't know what happens to people who break with this
+tradition, but I think it's safer not to find out. We'll start with a series
+of hello world programs that demonstrate the different aspects of the basics
+of writing a kernel module.
+
+ -- Ori Pomerantz
+ -- Linux Kernel Module's Programmer Guide ( )
+%
+The difference between a program and a script isn't as subtle as most people
+think. A script is interpreted, and a program is compiled.
+
+Of course, there's no reason you can't write a compiler that immediately
+executes the compiled form of a program without writing compilation artifacts
+to disk, but that's an implementation detail, and precision in technical
+matters is important.
+
+Though Perl 5, for example, doesn't write out the artifacts of compilation to
+disk and Java and .Net do, Perl 5 is clearly an interpreter even though it
+evaluates the compiled form of code in the same way that the JVM and the CLR
+do. Why? Because it's a scripting language.
+
+Okay, that's a facetious explanation.
+
+The difference between a program and a script is if there's native compilation
+available in at least one widely-used implementation. Thus Java before the
+prevalence of even the HotSpot JVM and its JIT was a scripting language and
+now it's a programming language, except that you can write a C interpreter
+that doesn't have a JIT and C programs become scripts.
+
+ -- chromatic
+ -- "Program vs. Script" ( http://use.perl.org/~chromatic/journal/35804 )
+%
+Of course, if someone were to write an extra optimizer step for Perl 5 to
+evaluate certain parts of the optree and generate native code in memory on
+certain platforms without writing it out to disk (uh oh…) and then execute
+that code under certain conditions, all Perl 5 scripts would automatically
+turn into programs. You know, like .pmc files, or Python's .pyc files. Uh.
+
+As well, if more people use Punie (Perl 1 on Parrot) this year than native
+Perl 1 -- a possibility -- then Perl 1 scripts automatically become Perl 1
+programs because Punie can use Parrot's JIT. I don't know if this powerful
+upgrade from script to program is retroactive, but I see no reason why not.
+
+Perl 5 scripts were briefly programs while Ponie was viable, but the removal
+of the code from the Parrot tree has now downgraded them back to scripts. We
+apologize for the inconvenience.
+
+ -- chromatic
+ -- "Program vs. Script" ( http://use.perl.org/~chromatic/journal/35804 )
+%
+To summarize, if you have a separate compilation step visible to developers,
+you have programs. If not, you have scripts. An exception is that if you have
+a separate, partial compilation step at runtime and not visible to users, then
+you may have programs. The presence of one implementation that performs
+additional compilationy thingies at runtime instantly upgrades all scripts to
+programs, while the presence of an interpreter for a language in which people
+normally write programs, not scripts, does not downgrade programs to scripts.
+Program-ness is sticky.
+
+I hope this is now clear.
+
+Ironically some JavaScript implementations have JITs, so the colloquial name
+of the language should change from JavaScript to JavaProgram.
+
+Script bad, four-legs good.
+
+ -- chromatic
+ -- "Program vs. Script" ( http://use.perl.org/~chromatic/journal/35804 )
+%
+I have always wished that my computer would be as easy to use as my telephone.
+My wish has come true - I no longer know how to use my telephone.
+
+ -- Bjarne Stroustrup
+ -- My Other New Computer (Replacement Model) ( )
+%
+Moving pianos is dangerous.
+Moving pianos are dangerous.
+
+ -- Language Log
+ -- "Nearly All Strings of Words are Ungrammatical" ( )
+%
+> Someone here said "Real Men use LaTeX". So I'll add:
+> * "Real men don't install Wine"
+> * "Real men don't watch T.V."
+
+Real men don't listen to sentences that start with "Real men don't".
+
+ -- Whatsup.org.il Comment ( http://whatsup.org.il/article/6023 )
+%
+I have to say I cringed a little when I read it, because it helps reinforce
+the idea that there's a sort of Perl Hierarchy, or that there are Perl gods,
+or that "you must be this tall to ride".
+
+Randal and I are just normal ol' Perl hackers. We just spend a lot of time on
+Perl, and writing about it, and talking about it. The only reason we are Perl
+luminaries is that we are Perl luminaries. I'm not necessarily a better
+programmer, or have better ideas, or I'm a better debugger than anyone else. I
+just do it and make noise about it.
+
+Even though Joey's response was out of line, I admire his spirit of "I'm just
+going to go do it." TMTOWTDI is one of the cardinal rules of Perl. Similarly,
+over on the module-authors list, the perennial argument of "Maybe CPAN should
+have minimum requirements for posting modules" has raised its ugly head.
+Instead, I said what I always say during these arguments: "CPAN thrives
+BECAUSE of the unfettered uploading of shit, not in spite of it."
+
+So to it will be with Joey's website. Maybe it will be a dismal failure. Maybe
+it will become the Next Great Perl resource. However, I know that there is
+zero chance of Next Great Perl resource if he doesn't try. The only way you
+get home runs is by stepping up to the plate, and if you strike out, you're
+doing pretty good. Batting 3/10 is a great batting average, but in real life
+we find those odds terrifying.
+
+Personally, as much as I like the community around Perlmonks, I think it's a
+terrible site for new people, and is practically unsearchable. I'd love to see
+something leapfrog Perlmonks and become the Next Great Thing. That's why I
+stopped writing to use.perl.org, because I think it's a terrible news source.
+Instead, I started perlbuzz.com, and went with that. Yes, it's different, but
+that's OK.
+
+Let a thousand flowers bloom!
+
+ -- Andy Lester
+ -- "Let a thousand flowers bloom" ( )
+%
+ <jrockway> "omg i have web 2.0 photoship skillz AND LOVE TEH GIT LETS
+ MAKE A STARTUP!!!11!!"
+ <awwaiid> it drops my cool-concept impressedness of github like 100
+ points
+ <jrockway> that's the rails mentality
+ <jrockway> "I have an idea, so I'm going to make a company"
+ <jrockway> compared to the perl version, "i have an idea, so I'm going
+ to write a module"
+ <awwaiid> is that why we're all poor?
+ <jrockway> awwaiid: no, starting companies is not how you get rich :)
+
+ -- What do you do with an idea?
+ -- #moose, irc.perl.org
+%
+ <Khisanth> <insert obligatory disclaimer about parsing HTML with
+ regex>
+ <Botje> Khisanth =~ s/disclaimer/death threat/
+ <Khisanth> I can live with that
+ <Botje> ooh, i got write access on Khisanth
+ <Botje> Khisanth =~ s/must sleep/must give Botje all my money/
+ <Botje> and now we play the waiting game … >:)
+ <afallenhope> Botje, write&
+ <Botje> yeah
+ * Khisanth gives all of Botje's money to himself
+ <Botje> Khisanth: that's not supposed to happen!
+ * Botje resets the universe
+ <Khisanth> buggy code
+ <snegtul> no such thing Khisanth! =)
+ <snegtul> the bugs are a lie!
+
+ -- Manipulating People with Perl
+ -- #perl, Freenode
+%
+Win95 - Wow!
+Win98 - Oh
+WinMe - Ow!
+Win2k - Oooh
+WinXp - Meh
+Vista - Doh!
+
+This mono-syllabic review brought to you by the letter 'W' and the number '7'
+
+ -- fretinator
+ -- I can't imagine saying "oh, wow!" about ( )
+%
+ <pkrumins> Prim's algorithm, om nom nom
+ <f00li5h> cats don't like being trapped in trees, is handy to know how
+ to traverse one quickly!
+ <pkrumins> true
+ <pkrumins> the more tree traversal algorithms a kit knows, the sneakier
+ the kit is
+ * f00li5h visits every node, travelling on the minimum weighted
+ edges
+ <pkrumins> sneaky kit
+
+ -- Cats and Computer Trees
+ -- #perl, Freenode
+%
+Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter.
+
+Try again. Fail again. Fail better.
+
+ -- Samuel Beckett
+ -- Worstward Ho ( )
+%
+Suppose you went back to Ada Lovelace and asked her the difference between a
+script and a program. She'd probably look at you funny, then say something
+like: Well, a script is what you give the actors, but a program is what you
+give the audience. That Ada was one sharp lady…
+
+ -- Larry Wall
+ -- "Programming is Hard, Let's Go Scripting" ( )
+%
+Now, however it was initially intended, I think BASIC turned out to be one of
+the first major scripting languages, especially the extended version that DEC
+put onto its minicomputers called BASIC/PLUS, which happily included recursive
+functions with arguments. I started out as a BASIC programmer. Some people
+would say that I'm permanently damaged. Some people are undoubtedly right.
+
+But I'm not going to apologize for that. All language designers have their
+occasional idiosyncrasies. I'm just better at it than most. :-)
+
+Anyway, when I was a RSTS programmer on a PDP-11, I certainly treated BASIC as
+a scripting language, at least in terms of rapid prototyping and process
+control. I'm sure it warped my brain forever. Perl's statement modifiers are
+straight out of BASIC/PLUS. It even had some cute sigils on the ends of its
+variables to distinguish string and integer from floating point.
+
+But you could do extreme programming. In fact, I had a college buddy I did
+pair programming with. We took a compiler writing class together and studied
+all that fancy stuff from the dragon book. Then of course the professor
+announced we would be implementing our own language, called PL/0. After
+thinking about it a while, we announced that we were going to do our project
+in BASIC. The professor looked at us like were insane. Nobody else in the
+class was using BASIC. And you know what? Nobody else in the class finished
+their compiler either. We not only finished but added I/O extensions, and
+called it PL 0.5. That's rapid prototyping.
+
+ -- Larry Wall
+ -- "Programming is Hard, Let's Go Scripting" ( )
+%
+My first scripting language was written in BASIC. For my job in the computer
+center I wrote a language that I called JAM, short for Jury-rigged All-purpose
+Meta-language. Story of my life…
+
+JAM was an inside-out text-processing language much like PHP, except that HTML
+hadn't been invented yet. We mostly used it as a fancy macro processor for
+BASIC. Unlike PHP, it did not have 3,000 functions in one namespace. We
+wouldn't have had the memory, for one thing.
+
+ -- Larry Wall
+ -- "Programming is Hard, Let's Go Scripting" ( )
+%
+For good or ill, when I went off to grad school, I studied linguistics, so the
+only computer language I used there was LISP. It was my own personal McCarthy
+era.
+
+Is LISP a candidate for a scripting language? While you can certainly write
+things rapidly in it, I cannot in good conscience call LISP a scripting
+language. By policy, LISP has never really catered to mere mortals.
+
+And, of course, mere mortals have never really forgiven LISP for not catering
+to them.
+
+ -- Larry Wall
+ -- "Programming is Hard, Let's Go Scripting" ( )
+%
+I think, to most people, scripting is a lot like obscenity. I can't define it,
+but I'll know it when I see it. Here are some common memes floating around:
+
+<<<
+
+Simple language
+"Everything is a string"
+Rapid prototyping
+Glue language
+Process control
+Compact/concise
+Worse-is-better
+Domain specific
+"Batteries included"
+
+>>>
+
+…I don't see any real center here, at least in terms of technology. If I had
+to pick one metaphor, it'd be easy onramps. And a slow lane. Maybe even with
+some optional fast lanes.
+
+ -- Larry Wall
+ -- "Programming is Hard, Let's Go Scripting" ( )
+%
+That's not helpful. When a project doesn't release a new version, some people
+say "Oh, don't use it! They don't release new versions!" When a project does
+release a new version, some people say "Oh, don't use it! It's not perfect
+yet!"
+
+Meanwhile, the so-called reliable state of the art is a jumble of Perl which
+writes cross platform shell scripts to install Perl code, and you customize
+that by writing a superclass from which platform-specific modules inherit
+pseudo-methods which use regular expressions to search and replace
+cross-platform cross-shell code, with all of the cross-platform and
+cross-shell quoting issues that entails. I wish I were making any of this up.
+(I wrote tests for part of it.)
+
+This is why we can't have nice things.
+
+ -- chromatic
+ -- "Re: Module::Build 0.30 is released" ( )
+%
+<<<
+
+Ask not what your country can do for you - ask what you can do for your
+country
+
+>>>
+
+-- John F. Kennedy (from his Inaugural Address).
+
+<<<
+
+The common good before the private good.
+
+>>>
+
+-- One of the slogans of Nazism in Nazi Germany.
+
+ -- Based on a page on an Objectivism Site
+ -- Glossary of Nazi Germany in the Wikipedia ( )
+%
+ <sQuEE> eval: [qr/^(\d)(?{ "x{$1}" })$/]
+ <buubot> sQuEE: [qr/(?-xism:^(\d)(?{ "x{$1}" })$)/]
+ * mauke looks at sQuEE
+ <sQuEE> :$
+ <fizztpok_> Man, I always feel like I'm getting the hang of Perl until I
+ see nonsense like that.
+ <mauke> what are you trying to do?
+ <sQuEE> im trying to eval qr/$regex/ which contains ^(\d)(??{
+ "x{$1}" })$ , but $@ returns null
+ <mauke> no, what are you actually trying to do?
+ <ik> sQuEE: what is the point of doing the thing that you are
+ doing?
+ <sQuEE> no, that’s just a testing example
+ <sQuEE> im trying to assign $regex what i captured from a previous
+ match using qr// , eval { $regex = qr/$2/ };
+ <sQuEE> im not sure what im doing wrong
+ <mauke> I'm not interested in what you're doing; what are you trying
+ to achieve?
+ <ik> You're capturing a regex with a regex and attempting to use
+ said regex?
+ <ik> I hope the data you're matching isn't input :(
+ <PerlJam> mauke: I'm trying to achieve world peace and this regex is
+ the last thing standing in my way! ;)
+ <Khisanth> there will be no world peace!
+ * Khisanth stabs PerlJam
+ <DrForr> Can I at least have whirled peas?
+ * PerlJam fires up the whirly gig for DrForr and inserts some
+ peas
+ * Khisanth dumps a bowl of whirled peas on DrForr's head
+ <DrForr> Mmm, whirled peas.
+
+ -- "What are you trying to achieve?"
+ -- #perl, Freenode
+%
+<<<
+
+What's the difference between JavaScript and Java?
+
+>>>
+
+One is essentially a toy, designed for writing small pieces of code, and
+traditionally used and abused by inexperienced programmers.
+
+The other is a scripting language for web browsers.
+
+ -- Shog9
+ -- Stackoverflow.com Question ( )
+%
+<<<
+
+R is similar to other programming languages, like C, Java and Perl, in that it
+helps people perform a wide variety of computing tasks by giving them access
+to various commands.
+
+>>>
+
+New York Times article about R, quoted in jest's use.perl.org journal -
+http://use.perl.org/~jest/journal/38229
+
+ -- jest
+ -- "Worst sentence ever written about programming in the MSM" ( )
+%
+<<<
+
+tk: A discussion is not a war, to be won or lost. It is a communal quest for
+truth. And you are inhibiting it by responding at only the most superficial
+level. Look beyond the presence of a word to its context. Respond to the
+thoughts expressed there. Or simply leave.
+
+>>>
+
+ -- slamb
+ -- "What does 'lose' mean?" (Comment on an Advogato Article) ( )
+%
+ <mst> but jrockway will bitch about them all anyway
+ <stevan> rhesa: 100% of those with the last name "Rockway" will do
+ that
+ <rhesa> hehehe
+ <rjbs> Subject: catalyst framework not compatible with PERL
+ <jrockway> stevan: i am going to name my kid "Someone is WRONG"
+ <stevan> jrockway: I think that will be implied, no need to actually
+ name him that
+ <perigrin> Someone is WRONG rockway
+ <perigrin> has a nice ring to it
+ <Penfold> aka 'little Bobby wrong'?
+ <rhesa> would make a great children's book series: SiW in the zoo etc
+ <stevan> :D
+ <stevan> the first one in the series should be Someone is Wrong on the
+ internet
+ <jrockway> rhesa: that is a great idea!
+ <jrockway> rhesa: i have a friend who is writing a children's book
+ <jrockway> i will tell her to change the title and content immediately!
+ <jrockway> someone is wrong in the children's book industry!
+ <rjbs> "No, zookeeper. That animal doesn't have a tail; it's *not* a
+ monkey!"
+
+ -- "Someone is Wrong"
+ -- #moose, irc.perl.org
+%
+ <jrockway> btw, feel free to LOL:
+
+ <jrockway> wow, such concise code
+ <jrockway> and i can FEEL THE SPEED from using arrays
+ <rjbs> bowl full of mush
+ <rindolf> jrockway: there was a discussion about using arrays as
+ objects in module-authors.
+ <jrockway> i read it and laughed
+ <jrockway> (yeah, someone is wrong on the internet, but i don't
+ really care)
+ <rjbs> I use JSON strings as my objects, and define my classes
+ in terms of regexps that pull out the right attributes.
+ <rjbs> It makes the code portable to JavaScript, except the
+ methods.
+ <jrockway> great plan!
+ <jrockway> regexps are fast in perl, because perl is designed for
+ parsing text
+ <rjbs> tx, can I add "endorsed by jon rockway" to my precis?
+ <jrockway> oh yeah
+ <jrockway> i recommend you reverse the JSON first, though, to
+ provide better encapsulation
+ <jrockway> otherwise people could read the objects… and that breaks
+ encapsulation, dontchaknow
+ <rjbs> I use UTF-16 and rot4096.
+ <jrockway> UTF-16 IS TOO SLOW!
+ <rindolf> Heh.
+ <jrockway> i can't believe we are even having this conversation…
+ utf-16…
+ <jrockway> i am never speaking to you again!
+ * rindolf wonders how one can combine JSON with inside-out
+ objects.
+ <rjbs> jrockway: no, no, WITHOUT the bom
+ <rjbs> BOM is what makes it slow.
+ <rjbs> rindolf: sub id { my $self = shift; $json_parser_for{
+ $self }->decode($json_for{ $self })->{id} }
+ <rindolf> rjbs: LOL.
+ <rindolf> rjbs++
+ <Dylan> unicode: somebody set us up the BOM
+ <ilmari> BOM-de-ada
+ <rindolf> Where's the BOM? There was supposed to be an
+ earth-shattering Ka-BOM!
+ <rjbs> I think Iran has it.
+ <perigrin> if it doesn't … Sen. McCain will introduce a bill to
+ provide them with one
+ <rjbs> give the bom bom bom, bom to Iran
+ <rjbs> funnier if you pronounce Iran properly
+ <perigrin> iran … iran so far away …
+ <rindolf> iRack - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rw2nkoGLhrE
+ <autarch> someone set us up the BOM
+ <jnapiorkowski> I thought all our base waz ownzed or something like that
+ * confound is the king of BOM
+ <rjbs> who's the BOM king?
+ <confound> I'm the BOM king!
+ <ubu> "once i was the King of BOM"
+ <rjbs> hear me now
+
+ -- Lightning Fast Objects
+ -- #moose, irc.perl.org
+%
+I did all I could to stop it, but it just wasn't possible. pgTAP 0.20 has
+somehow made its way from my Subversion server and infiltrated the PostgreSQL
+community. Can nothing be done to stop this menace? Its use leads to cleaner,
+more stable, and more-safely refactored code. This insanity must be stopped!
+Please review the following list of its added vileness since 0.19 to determine
+how you can stop the terrible, terrible influence on your PostgreSQL
+unit-testing practices that is pgTAP: …
+
+Don't make the same mistake I did, where I wrote a lot of pgTAP tests for a
+client, and now testing database upgrades from 8.2 to 8.3 is just too
+reliable! And by all means, DO NOT read the documentation or download and
+install this monstrosity, since it could easily lead to cleaner, more stable
+code, and therefore losing your job!
+
+http://pgtap.projects.postgresql.org/
+http://pgfoundry.org/frs/?group_id=1000389
+
+YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
+
+Good luck with your mission.
+
+ -- David E. Wheeler
+ -- pgTAP 0.20 Infiltrates Community ( )
+%
+I'm a Lesbian born in a man's body.
+
+ -- Unclear (origin needed)
+ -- Unknown
+%
+<<<
+
+If you have the same ideas as everybody else, but have them one week earlier
+than everyone else - then you will be hailed as a visionary. But if you have
+them five years earlier, you will be named a lunatic.
+
+>>>
+
+— Barry Jones
+
+ -- Barry Jones
+ -- Barry Jones Quotes ( http://www.answers.com/topic/jones-barry-1 )
+%
+<<<
+
+Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, small minds discuss
+people.
+
+>>>
+
+Unknown, quoted by [Admiral Hyman G.
+Rickover](http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Hyman_G._Rickover)
+
+ -- Hyman G. Rickover
+ -- Hyman G. Rickover Quotes ( )
+%
+<<<
+
+Better be a tail for the lions, rather than the head of the jackals.
+
+>>>
+
+Rabbi Mathiah Ben Charash in [Pirkei Avot 4,
+15](http://lib.cet.ac.il/Pages/item.asp?item=11025)
+
+ -- Rabbi Mathiah Ben Charash
+ -- Pirkei Avot 4, 15 ( http://lib.cet.ac.il/Pages/item.asp?item=11025 )
+%
+I must dispute your view in the strongest terms possible. Internet Explorer is
+perfectly safe for everyday use. However, as there is no such thing as perfect
+security, you must take additional precautions to keep evil hackers away from
+your data. Apply these rules according to the sensitivity of your data, from
+least important to most:
+
+* Disconnect your computer from your local network. Download files on another
+computer, scan them for viruses, print them out, scan them into your Windows
+PC using OCR software, and then view the pages in IE.
+
+* Do the above, but have a priest onsite to bless each page individually
+before scanning it. This is an excellent deterrent against viruses with the
+word "demon" in the name.
+
+* Do the above, but encase your PC in acrylic and immerse it in a 10,000
+gallon tank of holy water. Interact with it while wearing scuba gear.
+
+* Do the above, but put a lid on the tank and immerse it in the ocean.
+Interact with your PC via a submersible robot in the tank from from outside
+while wearing scuba gear.
+
+If you fail to follow these simple security guidelines, you can't blame
+Microsoft for the results.
+
+ -- palegray.net
+ -- "Re: Breaking News" Slashdot Comment ( )
+%
+Yesterday I asked one of my students if she knew what an encyclopedia is, and
+she said: "Is it something like Wikipedia?".
+
+ -- alisonclement
+ -- Twitter Twit ( http://twitter.com/alisonclement/status/8421314259 )
+%
+<<<
+
+The move from a structuralist account in which capital is understood to
+structure social relations in relatively homologous ways to a view of hegemony
+in which power relations are subject to repetition, convergence, and
+rearticulation brought the question of temporality into the thinking of
+structure, and marked a shift from a form of Althusserian theory that takes
+structural totalities as theoretical objects to one in which the insights into
+the contingent possibility of structure inaugurate a renewed conception of
+hegemony as bound up with the contingent sites and strategies of the
+rearticulation of power.
+
+>>>
+
+By the eight brazen balls of Azuza the Bibulous Bandicoot, I'd rather be cast
+naked and chained into a lake of bubbling white hot fondue cheese than be one
+of her students.
+
+That is, if she actually teaches anything at Berkeley [which can be, really, a
+lovely place full of very smart science people, theologians and historians,
+though you'd never know it by this whale's spout of academic doublespeak].
+
+I suspect she sits on a lot of committees and inserts the word 'hegemony' into
+conversations as often as possible and is avoided at all costs during the
+holidays lest one become becalmed in the horse latitudes of her spleen
+regarding Christmas trees, "The Ref" and the hegemony of Zionist post-piety in
+a restructured universe of gender in-articulation.
+
+For a full PhD at UCB in a language art, she cannot, and will not, though,
+write a simple, clear, understandable sentence. Think about that for a minute.
+
+And to think my Cal state taxes pay for her office desk chair. Man.
+
+Hegemoniously yours, etc.
+
+J
+
+ -- J. Hall
+ -- Post to writers@mit.edu . ( )
+%
+And truth be told I miss you.
+
+And truth be told I'm lying.
+
+ -- The All American Rejects
+ -- "Gives You Hell" Lyrics ( )
+%
+*One tool for one job?*
+
+<<<
+
+Given the nature of current operating systems and applications, do you think
+the idea of "one tool doing one job well" has been abandoned? If so, do you
+think a return to this model would help bring some innovation back to software
+development?
+
+(It's easier to toss a small, single-purpose app and start over than it is to
+toss a large, feature-laden app and start over.)
+
+>>>
+
+*Rob Pike:* Those days are dead and gone and the eulogy was delivered by Perl.
+
+ -- Rob Pike
+ -- Slashdot Interview ( )
+%
+Or think about shell programming, and reductionism. How many times have we
+heard the mantra that a program should do one thing and do it well?
+
+Well…Perl does one thing, and does it well. What it does well is to integrate
+all its features into one language. More importantly, it does this without
+making them all look like each other. Ducts shouldn't look like girders, and
+girders shouldn't look like ducts. Neither of those should look like water
+pipes, and it's really important that water pipes not look like sewer pipes.
+Or smell like sewer pipes. Modernism says that we should make all these things
+look the same (and preferably invisible). Postmodernism says it's okay for
+them to stick out, and to look different, because a duct ought to look like a
+duct, and a sewer pipe ought to look like a sewer pipe, and hammer ought to
+look like a hammer, and a telephone ought to look like either a telephone, or
+a Star Trek communicator. Things that are different should look different.
+
+ -- Larry Wall
+ -- "Perl, the first postmodern computer language" ( )
+%
+Which is why I didn't belabor it, or introduce it out of context. I was
+pointing out that Firefox's scheme is only as secure as the master password
+you choose. The particular bad password I chose for the Spaceballs reference
+on the hope that it might get a chuckle or trigger a brief moment of pleasant
+nostalgia, forgetting that on /., every joke must be beaten to death and
+explained, rehashed, insulted, re-explained by someone who thinks the insult
+came due to unfamiliarity, etc., until all traces of humor vanish. Oh well…
+
+Hmm… This is an old story, so this probably won't receive any mods, but I have
+no idea what I'd mod it if I were moderating.
+Flamebait/Insightful/Funny/Interesting/Off-topic maybe? Mods, if you can
+coordinate to apply each of those once, it would be awesome (and I'd end up
+with overall neutral Karma!). :-)
+
+ -- ShadowRangerRIT
+ -- "Re: Prettier Tool, Old Exploit" ( )
+%
+I keep hearing and reading this nice proverb *if it ain't broke, don't fix
+it*. The latest appearance was in response to [Shlomi
+Fish](http://community.livejournal.com/shlomif_tech/37969.html) suggesting
+that some Ancient Perl code should be replaced by Modern Perl code.
+
+I am not saying that every piece of code should be rewritten every 6 months,
+but in my understanding that sentence actually translates to *let's wait till
+it breaks and then panic*.
+
+I think people who say that sentence are afraid that the new version will
+break something. Sure, there is always a chance that a change introduces an
+error, but, if we are afraid to touch the code, what will happen when later on
+we encounter a case where it does not work? For example, if we need to use it
+in a new environment. Will we have the courage to change the code then? How
+much will it cost in money, time, and lost sleep?
+
+I think we have been trying to teach ourselves that we should have really good
+test coverage of our code and then we can easily refactor it and get rid of
+technical debt. So why do we keep hearing that sentence?
+
+ -- Gabor Szabo
+ -- What does "If it ain't broke, don't fix it." really mean? ( )
+%
+Often, when I ask the people I train if they know Perl, they tell me “I don't
+know Perl. I can only read it”. I wonder whether it indicates that Perl is not
+a write-only language as some people like to claim.
+
+ -- Gabor Szabo
+ -- Gabor Szabo (Perl programmer and trainer) ( http://szabgab.com/ )
+%
+(Discussing patents on storylines.)
+
+Hopefully someone will patent reality TV shows. I am rather sick of those.
+
+Wait no, this wont work. You need to have a story to be able to patent it.
+Soon all that will be on the air is reality TV. Noooo!
+
+ -- nitehawk214
+ -- USPTO Issues Provisional Storyline Patent ( )
+%
+<<<
+
+Real programmers use a nice editor and a nice programming language and get it
+done in less than O(N!).
+
+>>>
+
+-- vanguard on Freenode's ##programming
+
+ -- vanguard
+ -- Freenode's ##programming
+%
+An eye for an eye will make the whole world blind.
+
+ -- Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi (Attributed)
+ -- Mohandas Gandhi's Quotes ( http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Mohandas_Gandhi )
+%
+Princess Vespa: I am Princess Vespa, daughter of Roland, King of the Druids.
+
+Lone Starr: Oh great. That's all we needed. A Druish princess.
+
+Barf: Funny, she doesn't look Druish.
+
+ -- Mel Brooks
+ -- Spaceballs ( http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0094012/ )
+%
+[Greg the tech support guy is sitting in a Veterans club along with a veteran.]
+
+Veteran: Tech support? What the hell kind of wussy veteran experience is
+*that*?!
+
+Greg: Look, pal, *you* try to deal rationally with a horde of puerile,
+clueless, I-make-more-money-than-you-so-fix-this-now dorks on a daily basis
+and then tell me who should get a medal.
+
+[Pause.]
+
+Veteran: I…I'm sorry. I didn't know...
+
+Greg: Buddy, you have just *no idea* what *real* pain is about.
+
+ -- Illiad
+ -- UserFriendly Comic Strip for 10 October, 2001 ( )
+%
+ <Lubaf> “yo dawg, we heard you like recursion, so we put a yo dawg, we
+ heard you like recursion, so we put a yo dawg, we heard you
+ like recursion…”
+ <rindolf> Lubaf: :-)
+ <Lubaf> Further variation: “yo dawg, we heard you don’t like
+ fractals.”
+
+ -- Yo Dawg
+ -- #wikipedia, Freenode
+%
+There was one Napoleon, one George Washington, and one me!
+
+ -- Jim Cash and Joe Epps Jr.
+ -- Dick Tracy (1990 film) ( )
+%
+If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
+
+ -- Unknown
+ -- Unknown
+%
+A UDP packet walks into a bar, no one acknowledges him.
+
+A TCP packet walks into a bar twice because no one acknowledged him the first
+time.
+
+An ICMP packet walks into a bar, says “Hello!” to the bartender, who then in
+turn runs out to tell the ICMP packet’s wife.
+
+A BGP peer walks into a bar, exchanges contact details with every one, then
+leaves and… yeah I’ve probably gone over my quota for terrible jokes today.
+
+ -- Omega-00
+ -- You Down with UDP? ( http://gregsowell.com/?p=2742 )
+%
+The best thing about a UDP joke is that I don’t care if you get it or not.
+
+ -- Brandon
+ -- You Down with UDP? ( http://gregsowell.com/?p=2742 )
+%
+Golden rule #12: When the comments do not match the code, they probably are
+both wrong ;)
+
+ -- Steven Rostedt
+ -- Post to the Linux kernel mailing list ( http://lwn.net/Articles/433900/ )
+%
+Popular pet names Rover, Cheryl and Kate could be a thing of the past. Banks
+are now advising parents to think carefully before naming their child’s first
+pet. For security reasons, the chosen name should have at least eight
+characters, a capital letter and a digit. It should not be the same as the
+name of any previous pet, and must never be written down, especially on a
+collar as that is the first place anyone would look. Ideally, children should
+consider changing the name of their pet every 12 weeks.
+
+Expectant mothers have also been advised to choose carefully where they give
+birth. Anywhere that has a place name is best avoided. These are listed on
+maps, which are freely available on the Internet.
+
+It’s a good idea too, security experts have warned, for children not to get
+friendly with certain teachers. For instance, Miss Smith may be enriching your
+son’s education but he should try and see if he can’t make a favourite of
+Father O’Grinnighan-Scythe II, even though it may mean a lot of staying late.
+
+We tried to call Barclays’ security expert R0b Ste!nway for a comment, but he
+was not available for 24 hours, having answered his phone incorrectly three
+times in succession.
+
+ -- Boutros
+ -- NewsBiscuit Post ( )
+%
+There are a ton of reasons why Debian may have an older version of an upstream
+release. For example, and I hasten to point out that the following list is by
+no means exhaustive, and not all of the possibilities are common:
+
+* The Debian package maintainer is dead, but nobody noticed it yet, and nobody
+has wanted an update badly enough to do an NMU or to adopt the package.
+
+* The upstream release is actually a fake. It's a trojan, which was put there
+by the NSA in order to infiltrate the CIA mainframe. The Debian package
+maintainer noticed this and uploaded that version of the package to non-free
+instead of main, since the trojan code does not come with proper source.
+
+* Upstream has moved the RSS feed for new releases without notifying the old
+feed of the move, so the Debian package maintainer missed that, and doesn't
+actually know about the new release. Due to a complicated series of
+happenstance involving rainbows, midget unicorns, and the ongoing rewrite of
+the Netsurf web browser, the Debian package maintainer is not able to find the
+new feed because it would require doing a web search and their browser doesn't
+have working form support now. No other browser is available on the Amiga
+they're using as their only computer, either.
+
+* The new release is requested by insistent Hurd porters, and the Debian
+package maintainer absolutely loathes the Hurd, and will refuse to upload any
+packages that work on the Hurd.
+
+* The Debian package maintainer suffers from mental problems cause by reading
+debian-devel too much, and now has a nervous breakdown every time they
+recognize a name as someone whom they've seen on the list.
+
+* The Debian development process is being sabotaged by Microsoft sending
+people to the developers' houses pretending to be TV license checkers or
+Jehova's witnesses every time they detect, using the hardware wireless
+keylogger embedded in every PC, that the developer is trying to run any Debian
+packaging command.
+
+* Apple is also sabotaging Debian by paying me to write snarky e-mails on
+Debian mailing lists to distract everyone from working on the actual release,
+so that we can get past the freeze and start uploading things again without
+having to worry that it breaks things in ways that makes the freeze longer.
+
+ -- Lars Wirzenius
+ -- Post to debian-devel ( http://lwn.net/Articles/509254/ )
+%
+Some European users bugged me into adding an option to limit the number of
+messages retrieved per session (so they can control costs from their expensive
+phone networks). I resisted this for a long time, and I'm still not entirely
+happy about it. But if you're writing for the world, you have to listen to
+your customers—this doesn't change just because they're not paying you in
+money.
+
+ -- Eric Raymond
+ -- The Cathedral and the Bazaar ( )
+%
+Thank God I found the good in goodbye!
+
+ -- Beyoncé
+ -- “Best Thing I Never Had”
+%
+Do one thing every day that scares you.
+
+ -- Eleanor Roosevelt
+ -- Quote ( http://www.quotationspage.com/quote/35592.html )
+%
+I have a book on my bookshelf that I’ve never read, but that has a great
+title. It says, “All Truth is God’s Truth.” And I believe that. The most
+viable belief systems are those that can reach out and incorporate new ideas,
+new memes, new metaphors, new interfaces, new extensions, new ways of doing
+things. My goal this year is to try to get Perl to reach out and cooperate
+with Java. I know it may be difficult for some of you to swallow, but Java is
+not the enemy. Nor is Lisp, or Python, or Tcl. That is not to say that these
+languages don't have good and bad points. I am not a cultural relativist. Nor
+am I a linguistic relativist. In case you hadn't noticed. :-)
+
+ -- Larry Wall
+ -- Larry Wall’s “Perl Culture” Keynote ( )
+%
+A contest is being held to see which intelligence agency can find a rabbit in
+a forest as quickly as possible.
+
+First, it's the CIA's turn. Using cutting edge satellite technology, deep
+electronic scans, and other high-tech equipment, it is able to locate the
+rabbit in a week.
+
+Then, it's the KGB's turn. They install secret agents, bribe or threaten a few
+animals, and find the rabbit in two weeks.
+
+Then it's the [Shin Bet](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shin_Bet)’s turn (the
+Shin Bet being the Israeli internal security agency). A week passes, and then
+two, and then three.
+
+After two months, the camera zooms into the forest to see a bear tied to a
+tree with a Shin Bet agent slapping him saying “Admit you’re a rabbit! Admit
+you’re a rabbit! Admit it already, goddamnit!”
+
+ -- Israeli Joke
+ -- Google Plus Post ( )
+%
+Once I got into industry, I wrote a compiler in Pascal for a discrete event
+simulator, and slavered over the forthcoming Ada specs. As a linguist, I don't
+think of Ada as a big language. Now, English and Japanese, those are big
+languages. Ada is just a medium-sized language.
+
+ -- Larry Wall
+ -- "Programming is Hard, Let's Go Scripting" ( )
+%
+I’m worser at superlatives.
+And I don’t ever use no double negatives.
+
+ -- James at War
+ -- “Bad Grammar” ( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mj6QqCH7g0Q )
+%
+It was a /good/ storm. There was quite effective projection and passion there,
+and critics agreed that if it would only learn to control its thunder it would
+be, in years to come, a storm to watch.
+
+ -- Terry Pratchett
+ -- Wyrd Sisters ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wyrd_Sisters )
+%
+I figured wrong (with a capital R).
+
+ -- Harvey Danger
+ -- “Wine, Women, and Song” ( )
+%
+I was lucky as Ricardo SIGNES was also awake who explained that actually he
+has stopped using Module::Starter as he is writing
+[Dist::Zilla](http://metacpan.org/release/Dist-Zilla) that provides much
+better project management capabilities. I pointed him at my blog entry and
+after reading it he asked me if I know the expression *yak shaving* [=
+performing a task which is required by a different task which is required by…
+to achieve what one wants in the first place]. I've heard it, actually I even
+read about it in in [The Productive
+Programmer](http://productiveprogrammer.com/) I mentioned earlier in [The
+Quest for the Perfect
+Editor](http://szabgab.com/the-quest-for-the-perfect-editor.html) but I did
+not really understand it.
+
+Actually, I think I understood it back when I read the book but promptly
+forgotten it as I did not have any way to connect the expression to the
+actions or lack of actions.
+
+I was so lucky to find Ricardo there, as he explained:
+
+* I need to fix this bug, but first I better eat something so I don’t get
+tired.
+
+* So I'm going to have some cereal, but I'm out of milk.
+
+* So I'll go get some milk. But I heard that yak milk is the best, so I'll go
+out to Nepal to find a yak.
+
+* But they're all so hairy, I can't get to their udders.
+
+* So, first I'll just shave the yak.
+
+This is just the way you have to teach. Now I can remember it much more
+easily.
+
+ -- Gabor Szabo
+ -- “Yak Shaving” Blog Post ( http://szabgab.com/yak-shaving.html )
+%
+If a tree falls down in the middle of the forest, and there’s no one there to
+hear it… what colour is the tree?
+
+ -- Ron Gilbert
+ -- Monkey Island 2: LeChuck’s Revenge ( )
+%
+Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious.
+
+ -- Peter Ustinov
+ -- Peter Ustinov Quotes ( http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Peter_Ustinov )
+%
+If Botticelli were alive today, he’d be working for Vogue.
+
+ -- Peter Ustinov
+ -- Peter Ustinov Quotes ( http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Peter_Ustinov )
+%
+Beliefs are what divide people. Doubt unites them.
+
+ -- Peter Ustinov
+ -- Peter Ustinov Quotes ( http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Peter_Ustinov )
+%
+Feeling my way through the darkness
+Guided by a beating heart
+I can't tell where the journey will end
+But I know where to start
+
+They tell me I'm too young to understand
+They say I'm caught up in a dream
+Life will pass me by if I don't open up my eyes
+Well that's fine by me
+
+So wake me up when it's all over
+When I'm wiser and I'm older
+All this time I was finding myself
+And I didn't know I was lost
+
+I tried carrying the weight of the world
+But I only have two hands
+I hope I get the chance to travel the world
+But I don't have any plans
+
+Wish that I could stay forever this young
+Not afraid to close my eyes
+Life's a game made for everyone
+And love is the prize
+
+ -- Avicii
+ -- “Wake Me Up” ( )
+%
+Reg: All right, but apart from the sanitation, medicine, education, wine,
+public order, irrigation, roads, the fresh water system, and public health,
+what have the Romans ever done for us?
+
+Attendee: Brought peace?
+
+Reg: Oh, peace - shut up!
+
+ -- Monty Python
+ -- Life of Brian (1979) ( http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0079470/quotes )
+%
+Life is a strange thing. Just when you think you learned how to use it, it’s
+gone.
+
+ -- Shakespears Sister
+ -- “Hello (Turn Your Radio On)” ( )
+%
+ <Shammah> any time I see people talk about "Big O" as if it's some magic
+ voodoo I cringe hard
+ <Shammah> > I have worked +7 years as a programmer and still don't know
+ what Big O is
+ <Shammah> > Big O is very important and is one of the most important
+ things you should learn!
+ <Shammah> bro, you can learn it in 10 minutes
+ <Shammah> it's not a big deal
+ <Shammah> > In particular, "Big O" (and its related data structures and
+ algorithms concepts) is a key concept to making programs go
+ fast.
+ <Shammah> shit like that
+ <Shammah> rustles my jimmies so hard
+ <Shammah> my poor jimmies
+ <k-hos> non stop jimmies vibration
+ <_bryan> the cloud is more annoying
+ <_bryan> aka the internet renamed
+ <Shammah> A series of tubes 3.0
+ <_bryan> my old company launched a cloud marketing campaign on the
+ cloud
+ <_bryan> not a single customer of mine knew or cared
+ <Shammah> In particular, "Big O" (and its related data structures and
+ algorithms concepts) is a key concept to making programs go
+ fast.
+ <Shammah> the fuck did i just read
+ <altered> written by this guy http://i.imgur.com/Tsm63TJ.png
+ <Shammah> D:
+ <k-hos> sanic the hodgepodge!
+ <Jonas__> Shammah, you don't use big o magic?
+ <Jonas__> I use the big-o lib for everything
+ <Shammah> uh
+ <Shammah> I just use std::bigO();
+ <Jonas__> that's not even fast
+ <Shammah> :|
+ <Jonas__> boost::bigO<T>() is like the least you should even consider
+ <Jonas__> it's boosted so it's faster
+ <Shammah> sounds legit
+
+ -- Big O No
+ -- ##reddit-gamedev, Freenode
+%
+A fanatic: one who redoubles his efforts after he has forgotten his aim.
+
+ -- George Santayana
+ -- ESR: “Evaluating the harm from closed source” ( )
+%
+As it turns out, compiling a C program [= Vim] from more than 20 years ago is
+actually a lot easier than getting a Rails app from last year to work.
+
+ -- Pascal Hartig
+ -- “Building Vim from 1993 today” ( )
+%
+* Strength is being able to crush a tomato.
+
+* Dexterity is being able to dodge a tomato.
+
+* Constitution is being able to eat a bad tomato.
+
+* Intelligence is knowing a tomato is a fruit.
+
+* Wisdom is knowing not to put a tomato in a fruit salad.
+
+* Charisma is being able to sell a tomato based fruit salad.
+
+ -- tan620
+ -- D&D Reddit “D&D Stats Explained With Tomatoes” ( )
+%
+Some people were allocating memory before it was cool. These people are called
+heapsters.
+
+ -- Unknown
+ -- via ZadYree
+%
+A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough
+people to make it worth the effort.
+
+ -- Herm Albright
+ -- “Herm Albright’s ‘Positive Attitude’” ( )
+%
+A banker, who always advised his son to think big, came home one day to find
+the boy in the yard with the family dog and a sign, “Dog for Sale, $38,000.”
+The father smiled and went into the house.
+
+The next day, the sign–and the dog–had vanished. The banker asked his son,
+“You didn’t get $38,000 for the dog, did you?”
+
+“No,” the boy replied, “but I traded him for two $19,000 cats.”
+
+ -- Herm Albright
+ -- “Herm Albright’s ‘Positive Attitude’” ( )
+%
+One of my most productive days was throwing away 1,000 lines of code.
+
+ -- Ken Thompson (Attributed)
+ -- Ken Thompson Quote ( )
+%
+Anything less than the best is a felony.
+
+ -- Vanilla Ice
+ -- “Ice Ice Baby” Song ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ice_Ice_Baby )
+%
+Trust me: every problem in computer science may be solved by an indirection,
+but those indirections are *expensive*. Pointer chasing is just about the most
+expensive thing you can do on modern CPUs.
+
+ -- Linus Torvalds
+ -- Post to the Linux Kernel Mailing List ( http://lwn.net/Articles/509417/ )
+%
+*The Wise Janitor:* You gotta go out there, believe in the ball, and throw
+yourself.
+
+ -- Various Writers
+ -- Not Another Teen Movie ( )
+%
+Open source software: each person contributes a brick, but ultimately each
+person receives a house in return.
+
+ -- Brendan Scott (Attributed)
+ -- Unknown
+%
+I didn’t stop pretending when I became an adult, it’s just that when I was a
+kid I was pretending that I fit into the rules and structures of this world.
+And now that I’m an adult, I pretend that those rules and structures exist.
+
+ -- Ze Frank
+ -- Unknown
+%
+Hi! I’m Tony Horne, creator of P90X, and I got a brand new program for
+overweight pop-stars to go from bass to treble in just 90 seconds. It’s called
+Treble 90X.
+
+ -- Bart Baker
+ -- Meghan Trainor - “All About That Bass” PARODY ( )
+%
+It's the kind of movie where you would expect The Rock to slide on skateboard,
+along moving chopper rotors, to pick up a girl that is dodging a lion on a
+flag pole at the 200th floor of a building that is currently collapsing.
+
+ -- xeno
+ -- Chat on Freenode’s ##programming
+%
+There's only two things I hate in this world: people who are intolerant of
+other people's cultures, and the Dutch.
+
+ -- Mike Myers, and Michael McCullers
+ -- Austin Powers in Goldmember ( )
+%
+The greatest threat to authors and creative artists is not piracy — it’s
+obscurity.
+
+ -- Tim O’Reilly
+ -- “Piracy is progressive taxation.” ( )
+%
+Tech needs less wizards, ninjas, and rockstars, and way more sociologists.
+
+ -- Noah Slater
+ -- Tweet ( https://twitter.com/nslater/status/545592700289155072 )
+%
+At this point, I'd like to take a moment to speak to you about the Adobe PSD
+format. PSD is not a good format. PSD is not even a bad format. Calling it
+such would be an insult to other bad formats, such as PCX or JPEG. No, PSD is
+an abysmal format. Having worked on this code for several weeks now, my hate
+for PSD has grown to a raging fire that burns with the fierce passion of a
+million suns.
+
+If there are two different ways of doing something, PSD will do both, in
+different places. It will then make up three more ways no sane human would
+think of, and do those too. PSD makes inconsistency an art form. Why, for
+instance, did it suddenly decide that *these* particular chunks should be
+aligned to four bytes, and that this alignment should *not* be included in the
+size? Other chunks in other places are either unaligned, or aligned with the
+alignment included in the size. Here, though, it is not included. Either one
+of these three behaviours would be fine. A sane format would pick one. PSD, of
+course, uses all three, and more.
+
+Trying to get data out of a PSD file is like trying to find something in the
+attic of your eccentric old uncle who died in a freak freshwater shark attack
+on his 58th birthday. That last detail may not be important for the purposes
+of the simile, but at this point I am spending a lot of time imagining amusing
+fates for the people responsible for this Rube Goldberg of a file format.
+
+Earlier, I tried to get a hold of the latest specs for the PSD file format. To
+do this, I had to apply to them for permission to apply to them to have them
+consider sending me this sacred tome. This would have involved faxing them a
+copy of some document or other, probably signed in blood. I can only imagine
+that they make this process so difficult because they are intensely ashamed of
+having created this abomination. I was naturally not gullible enough to go
+through with this procedure, but if I had done so, I would have printed out
+every single page of the spec, and set them all on fire. Were it within my
+power, I would gather every single copy of those specs, and launch them on a
+spaceship directly into the sun.
+
+PSD is not my favourite file format.
+
+ -- Greg Onufer
+ -- Xee’s source code ( )
+%
+Stop reinventing wheels, start building space rockets.
+
+ -- www.cpan.org
+ -- Motto of CPAN ( http://www.cpan.org/ )
+%
+The key to making programs fast is to make them do practically nothing.
+
+ -- Mike Haetel (the original author of GNU grep)
+ -- “Why GNU grep is fast” ( )
+%
+“You may not work around any technical limitations in the software”
+
+— Windows Vista licence
+
+ -- Microsoft
+ -- Windows Vista EULA ( http://arachnoid.com/boycott/ )
+%
+Don’t use a big word when a singularly unloquacious and diminutive linguistic
+expression will satisfactorily accomplish the contemporary necessity.
+
+ -- Ultimate Giggles
+ -- Facebook Post ( )
+%
+It’s better to have loved and lost than to never have lost at all.
+
+ -- Samuel Butler (Unsourced)
+ -- Unknown
+%
+My latest personal project has a manual page, unit and integration tests,
+Debian packaging, a CI project, and a home page. I can install it and run it.
+It doesn’t yet do anything useful.
+
+ -- Lars Wirzenius
+ -- New project? Start with the scaffolding ( )
+%
+The cool thing about Vim is — you find something interesting with every typo.
+
+ -- Su-Shee
+ -- Freenode’s #perl conversation
+%
+<<<
+
+I've never used Cucumber in anger, but I thought it was for creating testcases
+that could be understood by non-technical clients, so you can concretely
+discuss features. If you're writing a compiler then all your clients will be
+programmers, so there's no need for such a thing.
+
+>>>
+
+Our clients are the parents, guardians, and teachers of children between the
+ages of eight and twelve inclusive.
+
+The intent of Cucumber is to make readable testcases, just as the intent of
+COBOL and AppleScript and visual component programming is to enable
+non-programmers to create software without having to learn how to program.
+
+ -- chromatic
+ -- Comment on “What Testing DSLs Get Wrong” ( )
+%
+I achieved my fast times by multitudes of 1% reductions.
+
+ -- Bill Raymond
+ -- Post to the Freecell Solver mailing list ( )
+%
+I shall explain: *Monologue*: one person talking to himself ; *Dialogue*: like
+Monologue - two people talking to themselves.
+
+ -- Shaike Ophir
+ -- The English Teacher ( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2bpVrKm9QCc )
+%
+"How can you trust an encyclopedia that everyone can edit?" How can you trust
+an encyclopedia that no one can edit!!
+
+ -- David Shay
+ -- Talk on an Israeli FOSS Conference
+%
+<<<
+
+<<<
+
+So what should I do to eliminate it?
+
+>>>
+
+Maybe Just Nothing
+
+The issue is that you can't special case get_current_coords to be truish, as
+far as Devel::Cover is concerned - it might not be.
+
+Any fix that could be thought up is inherently problematic.
+
+Coverage reporting is not done for the pretty colors - a human reads it, and
+says "OK, this is logical, get_current_coords always returns a true value".
+It's not a race for greens and percentages.
+
+>>>
+
+While I agree coverage is not a race, I disagree that a human should have to
+disambiguate between real missing coverage and a false negative. At least not
+more than once.
+
+I'll make the same argument "no broken windows" argument here that I do about
+warnings and tests: eliminate all warnings, even if they are dubious. Ensure
+all tests pass eliminating all false negatives. Do not leave any "expected
+warnings" or "expected failures" because this erodes the confidence in the
+test suite. Warnings and test failures fail to ring alarm bells. One
+"expected" warning leads to two. Then four. Then finally too many to remember
+which are expected and which are not and you ignore them all together.
+
+The Pragmatic Programmer does a good job with this argument.
+http://www.pragmaticprogrammer.com/ppbook/extracts/no_broken_windows.html
+
+So goes the same with coverage. Red should be a BAD color, something you do
+not want to see. You want to eliminate the red. But sometimes its a false
+negative. In that case there should be some way to tell the tool that it is,
+in fact, a false negative. Just like skipping tests, you store the fact that
+there is a false negative to make the red go away. Red remains a bad color and
+seeing it means something is wrong. The team doesn't have to remember which
+bits are expected to be uncovered and which are not.
+
+What's missing is a way to let Devel::Cover know that a bit of coverage is not
+necessary. The first way to do this which pops into my mind is a comment.
+
+my $foo = $bar || default(); # DC ignore X|0
+
+"Hey, Devel::Cover! Ignore the case where the right side of this logic is
+false."
+
+Ignored conditions would be green, but perhaps a slightly different shade of
+green so they can be spotted if you're looking for them.
+
+ -- Michael G Schwern
+ -- Post to the Perl-QA mailing list ( )
+%
+The Wise Janitor: Look, the thing that happened with Marty - it wasn't your
+fault.
+
+The Wise Janitor: OK, it was your fault…
+
+ -- Various Writers
+ -- Not Another Teen Movie ( )
+%
+So, did I immediately launch into a furious whirl of coding up a brand-new
+POP3 client to compete with the existing ones? Not on your life! I looked
+carefully at the POP utilities I had in hand, asking myself ``Which one is
+closest to what I want?'' Because:
+
+2. Good programmers know what to write. Great ones know what to rewrite (and
+reuse).
+
+While I don't claim to be a great programmer, I try to imitate one. An
+important trait of the great ones is constructive laziness. They know that you
+get an A not for effort but for results, and that it's almost always easier to
+start from a good partial solution than from nothing at all.
+
+Linus Torvalds, for example, didn't actually try to write Linux from scratch.
+Instead, he started by reusing code and ideas from Minix, a tiny Unix-like
+operating system for PC clones. Eventually all the Minix code went away or was
+completely rewritten—but while it was there, it provided scaffolding for the
+infant that would eventually become Linux.
+
+ -- Eric Raymond
+ -- The Cathedral and the Bazaar ( )
+%
+I recall a conversation where I told that in the comics HelpDex, the
+protagonist has wondered whether God was a programmer and in what programming
+language he wrote the universe. Then she had a dream where she heard God
+saying "I will tell you in which language I wrote the universe:
+Object-Oriented [COBOL](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/COBOL)!" at which point
+the protagonist wakes up scared.
+
+Then, a different participant who had immigrated from the former Soviet Union
+said that he was reminded of a story he read in a Soviet science magazine,
+where God and his angels were technicians who kept changing the universe based
+on how humans perceived it. Then during the 20th century, they had to
+implement [subatomic
+particles](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Subatomic_particle), [black
+holes](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_hole) and more, and fondly recalled
+how they once took a [giant world
+turtle](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_turtle), put four elephants on
+top, and called it a day
+
+ -- Soviet magazine
+ -- Conversation
+%
+The word's "forgiveness",
+look it up.
+It's what Jesus has in store for you,
+but I don't no matter what.
+
+ -- Ashton Shepherd
+ -- “Look it Up” ( )
+%
+<<<
+
+“They who saved one soul has saved the world Entire”
+
+>>>
+
+[Mishnah]()
+
+*Midrash:*
+
+It's fine to help, convince, inspire, etc. even only one person at a time.
+
+ -- Jewish Mishnah
+ -- "He who sustains one soul" ( )
+%
+"I've heard a Jew and a Muslim argue in a Damascus café with less passion than
+the emacs wars."
+
+-- Ronald Florence in <ueu1c4mbrc.fsf@auda.18james.com>
+
+ -- Ronald Florence
+ -- Debian Bug ( https://bugs.debian.org/cgi-bin/bugreport.cgi?bug=215884 )
+%
+"Those who make a distinction between education and entertainment don't know
+the first thing about either."
+
+- Marshall McLuhan (via "movement-sigs")
+
+ -- Marshall McLuhan
+ -- Debian Bug ( https://bugs.debian.org/cgi-bin/bugreport.cgi?bug=215884 )
+%
+The difference between theory and practice is that in theory, there is no
+difference between theory and practice, while in practice, there is.
+
+ -- Attributed to Yogi Berra and others
+ -- via fortune-mod ( https://github.com/shlomif/fortune-mod )
+%
+There's the story of Mullah Nasruddin, who was asked why he never married and
+answered, "I was looking for the perfect wife. I went to Damascus and met a
+wonderful woman but she had no spiritual side. Then I went to Cairo and met a
+woman who was deeply spiritual, but we didn't communicate well. I went from
+place to place looking for the perfect woman, then finally I found her and she
+was beautiful and spiritual and we communicated well. She was perfect."
+
+Then his friend asked why he didn’t marry her, and Mullah Nasruddin replied,
+"Unfortunately, she was looking for the perfect man!".
+
+ -- via "Nice Inspiration For Everyone"
+ -- Looking For The Perfect Wife ( )
+%
+Of her charitable pursuits, she (= Sarah Michelle Gellar) says:
+
+<<<
+
+I started because my mother taught me a long time ago that even when you have
+nothing, there's ways to give back. And what you get in return for that is
+tenfold. But it was always hard because I couldn't do a lot. I couldn't do
+much more than just donate money when I was on [Buffy] because there wasn't
+time. And now that I have the time, it's amazing.
+
+>>>
+
+ -- Sarah Michelle Gellar
+ -- Sarah Michelle Gellar as quoted on the English Wikipedia ( )
+%
+"eta prapaganda, americanska, imperialistitstisca, capitalististisca"
+
+ -- Lool
+ -- "Lool": "I am a woman" ( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RvebQE31oKw )
+%
+Seems like these four rabbis had a series of theological arguments, and three
+were always in accord against the fourth. One day, the odd rabbi out, with the
+usual "3 to 1, majority rules" statement that signified that he had lost
+again, decided to appeal to a higher authority. "Oh, God!" he cried. "I know
+in my heart that I am right and they are wrong! Please show me a sign, so they
+too will know that I understand Your laws."
+
+It was a beautiful, sunny day. As soon as the rabbi finished his plaint, a
+storm cloud moved across the sky above the four. It rumbled once and
+dissolved. "A sign from God! See, I'm right, I knew it!" But the other three
+disagreed, pointing out that stormclouds form on hot days.
+
+So he asked again: "Oh, God, I need a bigger sign to show that I am right and
+they are wrong. So please, God, a bigger sign."
+
+This time four stormclouds appeared, rushed toward each other to form one big
+cloud, and a bolt of lightning knocked down a tree ten feet away from the
+rabbis. The cloud dispersed at once. "I told you I was right!" insisted the
+loner, but the others insisted that nothing had happened that could not be
+explained by natural causes.
+
+The insisting rabbi is all ready to ask for a *very big* sign when just as he
+says "Oh God..." the sky turns pitch black, the earth shakes, and a deep,
+booming voice intones, "HEEEEEEEE'S RIIIIIIIGHT!"
+
+The sky returns to normal. The one rabbi puts his hands on his hips and
+snarls, "Well?" "Okay, okayyyy," replied another, "so now it's 3 to 2!"
+
+ -- via fortune-mod
+ -- fortune ( )
+%
+I had sex with my third cousin. My sister told me to stop counting.
+
+ -- Trashlord
+ -- #perlcafe conversation.
+%
+There is a Chinese story of a farmer who used an old horse to till his fields.
+One day, the horse escaped into the hills and when the farmer's neighbors
+sympathized with the old man over his bad luck, the farmer replied, "Bad luck?
+Good luck? Who knows?" A week later, the horse returned with a herd of horses
+from the hills and this time the neighbors congratulated the farmer on his
+good luck. His reply was, "Good luck? Bad luck? Who knows?"
+
+Then, when the farmer's son was attempting to tame one of the wild horses, he
+fell off its back and broke his leg. Everyone thought this very bad luck. Not
+the farmer, whose only reaction was, "Bad luck? Good luck? Who knows?"
+
+Some weeks later, the army marched into the village and conscripted every
+able-bodied youth they found there. When they saw the farmer's son with his
+broken leg, they let him off. Now was that good luck or bad luck?
+
+Who knows?
+
+Everything that seems on the surface to be an evil may be a good in disguise.
+And everything that seems good on the surface may really be an evil. So we are
+wise when we leave it to God to decide what is good fortune and what
+misfortune, and thank him that all things turn out for good with those who
+love him.
+
+ -- Unknown
+ -- Web page ( http://www.naute.com/inspiration/luck.phtml )
+%
+"Are we to understand," asked the judge, "that you hold your own interests
+above the interests of the public?"
+
+"I hold that such a question can never arise except in a society of
+cannibals."
+
+ -- Ayn Rand
+ -- Atlas Shrugged ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atlas_Shrugged )
+%
+Basically, there were two sides to the world. There was the entire computer
+games software industry engaged in a tremendous effort to stamp out piracy,
+and there was Wobbler. Currently, Wobbler was in front.
+
+ -- Terry Pratchett
+ -- Only You Can Save Mankind ( )
+%
+Liberals target Christians instead of Muslims for the same reason that PETA
+targets women wearing fur instead of biker gangs wearing leather…
+
+It's all about who it is easier to intimidate.
+
+ -- Unknown
+ -- Captioned Image ( )
+%
+Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build
+bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce
+bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
+
+ -- Rick Cook
+ -- The Wizardry Compiled (1989) ( https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Rick_Cook )
+%
+[Verse 1]
+Before last night I was down on my luck
+There was nothing going my way
+Before last night wasn't feelin' the love
+No reason for a smile on my face
+But I was always told you could turn it around
+Do it for the light of day
+So get yourself together, head out on the town
+The music gets you feeling okay
+Now I'm on a roll and I'm losing control, 'cause
+
+[Chorus]
+I got that sunshine
+It's like the world is mine
+I can't deny I'm feelin' good (Feelin' good)
+Can't stop from smiling, I'm bottled lightning
+Oh, deep inside I'm feelin' good (Feelin' good)
+All my heartbreak, my long and rainy days
+Are gone and now I can't complain
+Everything's alright, I'm feeling so alive
+I can't deny I'm feelin' good, yeah
+
+[Verse 2]
+I was so low on a Friday alone
+No one even calling my phone
+I looked in the mirror and I said to myself
+Why am I still sitting at home?
+Now I'm on a roll and I'm losing control, 'cause
+
+[Chorus]
+I got that sunshine
+It's like the world is mine
+I can't deny I'm feelin' good (Feelin' good)
+Can't stop from smiling, I'm bottled lightning
+Oh, deep inside I'm feelin' good (Feelin' good)
+All my heartbreak, my long and rainy days
+Are gone and now I can't complain
+Everything's alright, I'm feeling so alive
+I can't deny I'm feelin' good, yeah
+
+[Bridge]
+I got that sunshine, world is mine, I'm feelin' good
+I feel it deep inside, can't deny I'm feelin' good
+Everything's alright, so alive
+I'm feelin' good, I'm feelin' good, I'm feelin' good
+Hey, yeah
+
+[Chorus]
+I got that sunshine
+It's like the world is mine
+I can't deny I'm feelin' good (Feelin' good)
+Can't stop from smiling, I'm bottled lightning
+Oh, deep inside I'm feelin' good (Feelin' good)
+Yeah, all my heartbreak, my long and rainy days
+Are gone and now I can't complain (No, no, I can't complain)
+Everything's alright (Alright), I'm feeling so alive
+I can't deny I'm
+
+[Chorus]
+I got that sunshine
+It's like the world is mine (Yeah)
+I can't deny I'm feelin' good (Oh, I can't deny I'm feelin' good)
+Can't stop from smiling (Smiling), I'm bottled lightning
+Oh, deep inside I'm feelin' good, yeah
+All my heartbreak, my long and rainy days
+Are gone and now I can't complain (Yeah-yeah-yeah)
+Everything's alright (Alright), I'm feeling so alive, yeah
+I can't deny I'm feelin' good, yeah
+
+ -- Christina Grimmie
+ -- “Feelin’ Good” ( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kYX8sjIzjGw )
+%
projects / fortune-mod / commitdiff