1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:20,000 Suspense! 2 00:00:20,000 --> 00:00:24,840 Auto Light and its 96,000 dealers present radio's famous couple, Ozzie and Harriet 3 00:00:24,840 --> 00:00:34,680 Nelson in Mr. Diogenes, a suspense play produced and edited by William Spear. 4 00:00:34,680 --> 00:00:40,480 Well, here's a letter from Hap still on vacation. Let me read this. Dear Harlow, 5 00:00:40,480 --> 00:00:45,680 Dear Harlow, this is the light. He must mean double life for those thrifty wide-gap 6 00:00:45,680 --> 00:00:49,360 auto light resistor spark plugs that give you double the life as compared to 7 00:00:49,360 --> 00:00:53,240 ordinary spark plugs under equal service conditions. I've been saving up my voice 8 00:00:53,240 --> 00:00:58,040 to tell you. Saving? He knows that only wide-gap auto light resistor spark plugs 9 00:00:58,040 --> 00:01:02,360 can give him greater gas savings. That I feel like singing. And with auto light 10 00:01:02,360 --> 00:01:07,760 resistor spark plugs his car engine idles as easily as a song. Home, home on the ring. 11 00:01:07,760 --> 00:01:12,560 Ohm is right and that exclusive built-in 10,000 ohm auto light resistor found 12 00:01:12,560 --> 00:01:17,040 only in auto light resistor spark plugs permits a wide spark gap that makes 13 00:01:17,040 --> 00:01:21,520 smoother performance, double life and greater gas savings possible. So next 14 00:01:21,520 --> 00:01:24,760 time you visit your service station ask your dealer to install a set of the new 15 00:01:24,760 --> 00:01:29,640 auto light resistor spark plugs in your car. Remember you're always right with 16 00:01:29,640 --> 00:01:34,800 auto light. And now with Mr. Diogenes and the performance of Ozzie and Harriet 17 00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:41,320 Nelson, auto light hopes once again to keep you in suspense. 18 00:01:44,680 --> 00:01:49,760 It was last summer. David and Ricky were at camp and Harriet and I were spending a 19 00:01:49,760 --> 00:01:55,280 few weeks at our old apartment in New York. The excitement began with six cents. 20 00:01:55,280 --> 00:02:01,840 A nickel and a penny. I didn't find out about the nickel until later. That was all 21 00:02:01,840 --> 00:02:04,520 over but that's the way things go sometimes. 22 00:02:04,520 --> 00:02:10,080 Caesar didn't know about Brutus, Custer didn't know about Sitting Bull and I 23 00:02:10,080 --> 00:02:15,440 didn't know about the nickel. The conversation must have gone something 24 00:02:15,440 --> 00:02:24,280 like this. Hello. This is Hector. You crazy fool I told you not to call me. But no one could be 25 00:02:24,280 --> 00:02:28,520 listening in on your switchboard my dear. As you realize we are on the very brink 26 00:02:28,520 --> 00:02:31,880 before proceeding further. I must have your assurance there have been no 27 00:02:31,880 --> 00:02:37,000 changes. I told you that. Nelson is still the one. Right. But gee I'm getting worried. 28 00:02:37,000 --> 00:02:41,580 Oh come yourself my dear. So he talks afterwards so they start asking him questions. You have my 29 00:02:41,580 --> 00:02:48,360 assurance he won't talk. Yeah but just. No one ever got a straight story out of a dead man. What? Dead? 30 00:02:48,360 --> 00:02:54,200 Dear me I thought you understood that. No no I didn't. Listen Hector I don't want any part of this. 31 00:02:54,200 --> 00:02:58,740 Unfortunately my dear you already have a part of it. Nelson is down the street in a 32 00:02:58,740 --> 00:03:02,360 tobacco shop at this very moment. We'll be good friends inside of ten minutes. 33 00:03:02,360 --> 00:03:11,960 Goodbye. 34 00:03:11,960 --> 00:03:21,160 Ah you lose the bet Eddie you haven't gained a pound. Take a look at the card. 35 00:03:21,160 --> 00:03:27,320 Ahs are you sure you had both feet on the scale? You mean you're questioning my word the word of 36 00:03:27,320 --> 00:03:33,400 an Eagle Scout emeritus? Eagle Scout. Troop 3 Ridgefield Park New Jersey. Scouts on her see. 37 00:03:33,400 --> 00:03:40,000 Both feet on the scale. Now as I recall the bet was two bits against a can of pipe tobacco. 38 00:03:40,000 --> 00:03:45,560 I'll take gold nugget. No dice. All out of gold nugget ever since they started that crazy radio 39 00:03:45,560 --> 00:03:55,440 program of theirs. Let's see how about some of this. What's the matter? See that's a funny one. 40 00:03:55,440 --> 00:04:03,760 Look I'll refund your penny. No no no no no the card here. Look at my fortune. Today will be the 41 00:04:03,760 --> 00:04:09,600 most memorable day of your life. So what so as memorable. Today's our anniversary you know. Yeah. 42 00:04:09,600 --> 00:04:19,440 Oh it's just a coincidence. Sure. Did you ever see a card like this before Eddie? Ahs every time a 43 00:04:19,440 --> 00:04:24,440 guy gets weighed I don't run right quick and peek over his shoulder. No but the wording is so peculiar. 44 00:04:24,440 --> 00:04:30,920 The most memorable day of your life. That's a pretty broad statement for a scale company to make. 45 00:04:30,920 --> 00:04:36,760 Tell you what if it turns out a bust come back tomorrow and we'll dope out a nasty letter to the 46 00:04:36,760 --> 00:04:41,640 scale people. Okay Eddie thanks for the tobacco. Forget it so long. So long. 47 00:04:41,640 --> 00:04:59,560 Most memorable day of your life. Kind of strange at that. Most memorable day. Oh I'm sorry. My fault 48 00:04:59,560 --> 00:05:03,880 entirely in a hurry didn't require going. Forgive me please. My fault entirely. Should have looked 49 00:05:03,880 --> 00:05:12,440 like I was going. Sorry. Hey hey wait a minute. You dropped your wallet. Hey mister. Hey just a 50 00:05:12,440 --> 00:05:18,600 minute will you. Oh. Here you dropped your wallet. Wallet. Oh yes I know. Lucky I caught up with you. 51 00:05:18,600 --> 00:05:24,600 I'm quite aware I dropped my wallet young man. Thank you so much. You mean you make a hobby of 52 00:05:24,600 --> 00:05:30,760 dropping wallets. You hit the nail on the head sir. This is a red letter day on my calendar. The most 53 00:05:30,760 --> 00:05:37,240 memorable day of my life. Oh well it was. What did you say. The most memorable day of my life mister. 54 00:05:38,440 --> 00:05:44,360 Nelson. Ozzie Nelson. Mister Nelson. Allow me to introduce myself sir. My name is Diogenes. 55 00:05:44,360 --> 00:05:52,040 Diogenes. Hector Diogenes. I seek the honest man. Oh well that's very interesting mister Diogenes. 56 00:05:52,040 --> 00:05:56,840 The wallet you see is full of stage money. I have dropped it at the feet of a hundred oh nay a 57 00:05:56,840 --> 00:06:02,280 thousand candidates just as I did a moment ago. Allow me to congratulate you mister Nelson. You 58 00:06:02,280 --> 00:06:08,200 are the first to pick it up and return it to me unhesitatingly. Oh tell me do you plan to be home 59 00:06:08,200 --> 00:06:13,320 tonight. Well as a matter of fact no it's our anniversary and mrs. Nelson and I plan to celebrate. 60 00:06:13,320 --> 00:06:19,640 Oh dear. Too bad too bad. You'll simply have to change your plans. There's no other way. I beg your 61 00:06:19,640 --> 00:06:25,800 pardon. I admit sir my methods may seem a bit eccentric but this I permit myself with five 62 00:06:25,800 --> 00:06:31,320 millions of dollars a man may allow himself the luxury of eccentricity. My goal my target has 63 00:06:31,320 --> 00:06:37,000 never changed from the first to discover the honest man then to indoctrinate him with the wisdom of my 64 00:06:37,000 --> 00:06:43,640 ancient namesake Diogenes the cynic. That hurdle passed my fortune my resources everything are at 65 00:06:43,640 --> 00:06:48,440 his disposal. But now wait a minute just a minute let me get the thing straight. Very simple. Here 66 00:06:48,440 --> 00:06:53,160 in this leather covered book are the discourses of Diogenes the wisdom of the greatest thinker 67 00:06:53,160 --> 00:06:58,120 the world has ever known in 20 short pages. Now you will take this with you mr Nelson and commit 68 00:06:58,120 --> 00:07:02,920 it to memory tonight. Tomorrow morning at nine o'clock here at this very place we shall meet 69 00:07:02,920 --> 00:07:08,280 and I will hear you recite. Now time is of the essence sir. Spend it well spend it gloriously 70 00:07:08,280 --> 00:07:13,560 tonight at the feet of Diogenes the cynic. Your fortune your future nay the world itself 71 00:07:13,560 --> 00:07:24,040 are within your grasp. And now good day sir. Well wait now no just a minute. And godspeed. 72 00:07:33,320 --> 00:07:42,840 Harriet. Harriet. In here dear. Oh hi. Home a little early aren't you? Yeah I guess so. How's the new 73 00:07:42,840 --> 00:07:49,640 hairdryer work? Oh wonderfully see. All dry. Well for once I gave you something useful for Christmas. 74 00:07:49,640 --> 00:07:55,080 You certainly did. Oh gosh I'm so excited about tonight. Oh that's nice. Dinner a show maybe 75 00:07:55,080 --> 00:08:02,840 dancing afterwards. Shouldn't I be excited? Uh Harriet that brings up a very touchy problem. 76 00:08:02,840 --> 00:08:08,360 Oh. A strange thing happened to me today. Sort of weird you might say in fact I don't know what to 77 00:08:08,360 --> 00:08:14,120 make of it. Well you've heard about that already. About what? The tickets. Tickets? Oh I thought 78 00:08:14,120 --> 00:08:18,520 that's what you meant. Everybody in the building here got a free pair of tickets to South Pacific 79 00:08:18,520 --> 00:08:23,480 tonight. You're kidding. No sir. They were stuck under all the front doors. No note or explanation 80 00:08:23,480 --> 00:08:28,520 just a pair of tickets in a plain white envelope. South Pacific? Holy they're worth a small fortune 81 00:08:28,520 --> 00:08:34,200 you know. How come? Nobody knows. Well I know but a thing like that just doesn't happen there must be 82 00:08:34,200 --> 00:08:40,920 a reason. You say everybody got them? Well not quite. 12 apartments, 11 envelopes, three guesses 83 00:08:40,920 --> 00:08:46,760 who missed out. Us? Uh-huh. But I took it gracefully. I told everybody we were still going to celebrate 84 00:08:46,760 --> 00:08:53,880 our anniversary even if we had to buy tickets to something. Gosh Harriet does something about today 85 00:08:53,880 --> 00:08:59,000 strike you as kind of different? Well sure it's our anniversary. That makes it different. No no I mean 86 00:08:59,000 --> 00:09:07,240 something strange. You might even say memorable. Memorable? What I mean is if somebody happened to 87 00:09:07,240 --> 00:09:12,440 predict that today would be a very memorable day all this would sort of bear them out wouldn't it? 88 00:09:12,440 --> 00:09:17,880 Ozzy has Madame Zazab been reading your palm again? Well not Madame Zazab but a scale. 89 00:09:19,000 --> 00:09:23,080 On my way to work this morning I got on the scale at Eddie's. Oh I'll get it there. 90 00:09:23,080 --> 00:09:27,400 Oh hello Mrs. Pearson. Mrs. Nelson I hope you don't mind the intrusion. Hello Mr. Nelson. Hello Mrs. 91 00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:32,120 I guess you heard Lemmy Woods. Oh my husband Captain Pearson. Ship got in last night and his usual 92 00:09:32,120 --> 00:09:37,080 limbs completely done in but completely. I couldn't get Captain out tonight with a team of wild horses 93 00:09:37,080 --> 00:09:42,200 so I want you to have these. Oh what's this? The tickets. To South Pacific? Yes I heard you folks 94 00:09:42,200 --> 00:09:46,120 missed out and it seems such a shame being your anniversary and all. Oh that's very sweet of you 95 00:09:46,120 --> 00:09:49,880 Mrs. Pearson but I should think your husband would love to come. Not the Captain. No sir home he is 96 00:09:49,880 --> 00:09:54,440 and home he stays so take him and have a good time. No skin off our noses. We're going to stay home 97 00:09:54,440 --> 00:09:58,840 tonight and watch the television. The fights are on and Lem's never seen our new set you know. Oh and 98 00:09:58,840 --> 00:10:03,240 speaking of television there was something I did want to mention Mrs. Nelson. I hope you won't take 99 00:10:03,240 --> 00:10:08,520 offense. Why of course not. What is it? It's that thing over there on the table. The hair dryer? Uh 100 00:10:08,520 --> 00:10:13,560 huh. It's strange but every time you turn it on we get buzzing on our television. I was hoping 101 00:10:13,560 --> 00:10:17,720 while Captain's home you could use it day times instead of night times. Why of course not. I 102 00:10:17,720 --> 00:10:22,120 wish you'd told me before. Oh I don't mind for myself but now with Lem home. Oh I'll remember Mrs. 103 00:10:22,120 --> 00:10:26,680 Pearson and thanks for the tickets. Oh sure it's nothing at all. That's what neighbors are for you 104 00:10:26,680 --> 00:10:31,720 know. Have a good time now and happy anniversary. Oh thank you and good night Mrs. Pearson. Good night. 105 00:10:33,720 --> 00:10:39,080 Oh boy that was a seven day blow. I know but she is sweet. Isn't it wonderful dear now we can go 106 00:10:39,080 --> 00:10:47,160 after all. Uh Harriet before we go any further I'm gonna have to add one more thing. I'm gonna 107 00:10:47,160 --> 00:10:53,720 have to ask your full cooperation. That sounds like a speech. It is a short one. To state it as 108 00:10:53,720 --> 00:10:59,000 boldly as possible I don't know whether we ought to go out and celebrate or stay home and study Greek. 109 00:11:01,560 --> 00:11:08,760 Harriet I say it again slower. I said we have one of two alternatives to go out to South Pacific 110 00:11:08,760 --> 00:11:15,000 or stay home and study Greek. Now that I hear I realize it calls for a short explanation. 111 00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:17,000 See while I was at the school. 112 00:11:26,280 --> 00:11:28,600 Do you mind the radio dear? No 113 00:11:31,000 --> 00:11:39,000 but what is Caesar to a cynic but Zeus who hath deputed him and whom he serves. I'm glad you asked 114 00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:46,280 that. Oh please. It's seven thirty dear I just thought you might like to know. Uh-huh get this 115 00:11:46,280 --> 00:11:53,800 right on the subject. I'm listening. A woman came upon Diogenes sitting before his hut during the 116 00:11:53,800 --> 00:12:02,280 revels of Bacchus. Foolish man she said. Why do you turn your back on this festival? Why rest idly 117 00:12:02,280 --> 00:12:08,680 here while others go to play at the theater? A very good question. What did Diogenes say? And the man 118 00:12:08,680 --> 00:12:16,120 answered simply woman I am Diogenes the cynic. Ah he was cheating he didn't answer the question at 119 00:12:16,120 --> 00:12:23,080 all. Well what do we do? I think it's a practical joke. No not necessarily nothing unusual about a 120 00:12:23,080 --> 00:12:28,520 loony millionaire you know. I read about a woman who left six million dollars to a cat. It's a 121 00:12:28,520 --> 00:12:34,360 gamble. If we go out tonight and he shows up tomorrow we lose a fortune. On the other hand if 122 00:12:34,360 --> 00:12:42,040 I stay home with Diogenes I'll. Uh-huh. I'll lose it anyway I couldn't memorize this thing for ten 123 00:12:42,040 --> 00:12:46,760 million dollars. Where's your coat? I'm in it. Here's your hat. You're always ahead of me. 124 00:12:51,320 --> 00:12:55,320 Here it is the show you've been waiting for the gold nugget gold rush. 125 00:12:58,280 --> 00:13:04,200 Get the radio will you dear. Yes folks here it is the show that just loves to give 126 00:13:04,200 --> 00:13:10,040 money away no refrigerators no mink coats no. We can grab a taxi down by the drug store. 127 00:13:10,920 --> 00:13:15,400 Did you lock the back door? Yep. Say maybe we better go down the stairs it's quicker. All right. 128 00:13:16,920 --> 00:13:21,720 Hey look the elevator's coming up. Well that's funny I thought everybody was out to the show 129 00:13:21,720 --> 00:13:25,640 tonight. Well maybe it's the Pearsons. No they're on the first floor right next to the lobby. 130 00:13:27,160 --> 00:13:32,520 Well look who's here for heaven's sakes. Good evening Mr. Nelson. Uh uh Harriet this is Mr. 131 00:13:32,520 --> 00:13:37,640 Diogenes the man I was telling you about. Oh how do you do. And may I present my assistant Mr. 132 00:13:37,640 --> 00:13:46,120 Mordecai Moran. Oh how do you do. We decided to go out after all Mr. Diogenes. I sort of skimmed 133 00:13:46,120 --> 00:13:50,920 through the book and and well frankly I could never get it down pat by tomorrow morning. Ozzy 134 00:13:50,920 --> 00:13:56,040 always was slow to memorize. Yeah. I have to write things down. That's right. But Mr. Nelson I thought 135 00:13:56,040 --> 00:14:02,360 I made that amply clear. You simply have to change your plans. Well I'm afraid it's too late for 136 00:14:02,360 --> 00:14:07,240 that. See my wife has been very anxious to see the show. You know it's. He's stumped. He's stumped 137 00:14:07,240 --> 00:14:14,440 boss. He don't get it. Does this help any pal. Mordecai for the moment you may put away the gun. 138 00:14:14,440 --> 00:14:20,360 Is this part of the joke Ozzy. Well I hope so. On the contrary Mr. Nelson this is most assuredly not 139 00:14:20,360 --> 00:14:26,120 a joke. I must warn you not to cry out or create a disturbance. If you are so rash as to do so 140 00:14:26,120 --> 00:14:32,520 Mordecai knows he is free to use his gun with impunity. Yeah impunity. Now get in there now. 141 00:14:43,960 --> 00:14:48,200 Auto Light is bringing you Ozzy and Harriet Nelson in Mr. Diogenes. 142 00:14:48,200 --> 00:14:56,920 Tonight's production and radio's outstanding theater of thrills suspense. 143 00:14:59,800 --> 00:15:05,560 Now let's see what else Hap has to say in his letter. Yesterday I visited the Grand Canyon. What 144 00:15:05,560 --> 00:15:12,200 a wide gap. Ah good old Hap. All he can think of is the extra wide gap of auto light resistor spark 145 00:15:12,200 --> 00:15:17,000 plugs that give you smoother engine performance on leaner gas mixtures. Actually save you gas. 146 00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:22,040 Sometimes I think of you back there telling folks about auto light resistor spark plugs. 147 00:15:22,040 --> 00:15:27,000 He's on the beam all right because only auto light resistor spark plugs can give you greater gas 148 00:15:27,000 --> 00:15:32,040 savings, smoother performance and double spark plug life. And don't forget those auto light bull's 149 00:15:32,040 --> 00:15:37,320 eye sealed beam headlights. Don't worry I won't because auto light bull's eye sealed beam headlights 150 00:15:37,320 --> 00:15:42,040 are the new safe headlights guaranteed to give light even when the lens is cracked or broken. 151 00:15:42,040 --> 00:15:47,480 Harlow you remember everything. So friends see your auto light dealer tomorrow and get a set of 152 00:15:47,480 --> 00:15:53,320 wide gap auto light resistor spark plugs for your car. Then wherever you travel whatever you drive 153 00:15:53,320 --> 00:16:00,040 you're always right with auto light. And now auto light brings back to our Hollywood sound stage 154 00:16:00,040 --> 00:16:06,600 our stars Ozzy and Harriet Nelson with Joseph Kearns in Mr. Diogenes. A tale well calculated 155 00:16:06,600 --> 00:16:18,200 to keep you in suspense. It took a little while to get rid of the notion that Mr. Diogenes was 156 00:16:18,200 --> 00:16:24,520 pulling a practical joke. He just walked out of a comic strip somewhere but he wasn't kidding. 157 00:16:25,160 --> 00:16:32,680 His little pig eyes had greed in them now. There's something cruel about his floppy fat jowls and his 158 00:16:32,680 --> 00:16:38,840 thick lips. He's like one of those blown up animals in Macy's Christmas parade. In Mordecai 159 00:16:39,720 --> 00:16:43,320 he looked like he'd crawled out from under the reptile house at the Bronx Zoo. 160 00:16:44,280 --> 00:16:49,640 The minute the door closed both of them headed for the radio. It's a nice radio you have here. 161 00:16:49,640 --> 00:16:54,760 Very nice. Where would the switch be Mr. Nelson? Oh yes here. Now listen to me before you settle 162 00:16:54,760 --> 00:16:59,880 down for the evening whatever you want we don't have. Can you understand that? It's some other 163 00:16:59,880 --> 00:17:04,680 Nelson. New York is crawling with Nelsons. There are more Nelsons in New York than there are in 164 00:17:04,680 --> 00:17:14,200 Sweden. Furthermore we aren't rich. Mordecai. That's enough Mordecai. Everything in its place 165 00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:27,080 Mr. Nelson and in its proper time. Now here it is everybody the gold nugget gold rush. 166 00:17:27,080 --> 00:17:33,080 Are you all right Ozzy? Yeah quiet please. 167 00:17:33,080 --> 00:17:37,800 This now stands as the biggest prize ever offered on any giveaway program anywhere. 168 00:17:37,800 --> 00:17:44,120 Tonight after 16 weeks nobody has yet identified poor Mr. Hakaway the man who smokes the wrong 169 00:17:44,120 --> 00:17:50,840 kind of pipe tobacco and our gold nugget gold rush bonanza jackpot stands at the all-time high of 170 00:17:50,840 --> 00:17:59,400 $58,000 in cash. 171 00:18:00,840 --> 00:18:06,120 Ozzy what is this? I don't know but I think I'm catching on. Tonight as usual our phone call will 172 00:18:06,120 --> 00:18:10,680 go out to one of the thousands of discriminating men who long ago discovered the rich bite-free 173 00:18:10,680 --> 00:18:16,600 meloness of gold nugget pipe tobacco and tonight as usual our pony express rider is waiting at his 174 00:18:16,600 --> 00:18:22,760 post with $58,000 in greenbacks in his saddlebags ready to go if our contestant correctly guesses 175 00:18:22,760 --> 00:18:28,040 the identity of that unenlightened misguided long-suffering fella who smokes the wrong kind 176 00:18:28,040 --> 00:18:33,480 of pipe tobacco poor Mr. Hakaway. Now while we're getting Mr. Hakaway out of his wheelchair and up 177 00:18:33,480 --> 00:18:41,320 to the mic stand by your phone. Turn that down Mordecai. Yeah boss. Yeah. I couldn't help 178 00:18:41,320 --> 00:18:47,800 hearing you say you were catching on Mr. Nelson. Ozzy they're calling you tonight. Ask Mr. Diogenes. 179 00:18:47,800 --> 00:18:53,640 Exactly, exactly. Perhaps you didn't realize Mr. Nelson how lucky you were. Well how did you find 180 00:18:53,640 --> 00:18:58,760 out about it? Oh boy shall I? No, no, no Mordecai. I don't think we need concern ourselves with the 181 00:18:58,760 --> 00:19:03,560 possibility either of these charming people would behave indiscreetly after it's over. 182 00:19:04,200 --> 00:19:08,360 I became acquainted a short time ago with the telephone operator on this program Mr. Nelson 183 00:19:08,360 --> 00:19:14,680 and she informed me in return for a share of the proceeds that you were selected early this week. 184 00:19:14,680 --> 00:19:19,160 It then became a simple problem of insuring against intrusion by the other denizens of the 185 00:19:19,160 --> 00:19:24,120 building here. That's where the tickets came from. Precisely and ensuring also that you would be at 186 00:19:24,120 --> 00:19:28,280 home at the time the call was made. Hence my little gambit with the wallet this morning. 187 00:19:28,280 --> 00:19:33,160 Now attend me carefully. The call will come through in a moment. I shall take it a word 188 00:19:33,160 --> 00:19:39,480 and outcry from either of you and Mordecai shoots. Is that quite clear? Yeah but you know 189 00:19:39,480 --> 00:19:44,120 you'll never get away with it. Enough, enough already. Yes sir. 190 00:19:48,920 --> 00:19:52,920 Here's the big moment now folks. The phone call is going through and while we're waiting for the 191 00:19:52,920 --> 00:20:04,200 connection here once again is poor Mr. Hakaway. He scratches a match, he lights his pipe, he inhales 192 00:20:05,640 --> 00:20:08,600 and of course because it's the wrong kind of pipe tobacco 193 00:20:11,160 --> 00:20:15,960 that's all there is to it. The rest is up to the lucky man who's getting tonight's call. 194 00:20:15,960 --> 00:20:22,760 Who is Mr. Hakaway? All right, steady now. Don't take your eyes off the Mordecai. 195 00:20:25,400 --> 00:20:30,360 Hello. This is the Gold Nugget Gold Rush Radio program sir. For security reasons we are identifying 196 00:20:30,360 --> 00:20:37,400 you only as Mr. O.N. Would you give me your name please? Oswald G. Nelson. Fine, fine. You sir are 197 00:20:37,400 --> 00:20:43,720 our lucky contestant tonight. Is your radio tuned to our program sir? Indeed it is. Good, good. 198 00:20:43,720 --> 00:20:51,240 Then you know about poor Mr. Hakaway. Have you any idea who he is? I think so. Remember you only have 199 00:20:51,240 --> 00:20:56,040 one guess. If correct our Gold Nugget Pony Express Watter will arrive at your home with 200 00:20:56,040 --> 00:21:02,040 fifty eight thousand dollars in cash within the hour. I don't need to point out that's a load of 201 00:21:02,040 --> 00:21:08,280 hey. So don't hurry, think carefully. Think Mr. O.N. Take your time and think. 202 00:21:08,280 --> 00:21:17,080 Now who is poor Mr. Hakaway? Harpo Marx. Harpo Marx, Harpo you're absolutely correct. Harpo Marx it is. 203 00:21:17,080 --> 00:21:21,880 Congratulations Mr. O.N. You've just won yourself fifty eight thousand dollars in cash. 204 00:21:21,880 --> 00:21:27,240 Our messenger is on his way home. Goodbye Mr. O.N. and congratulations. Yes, goodbye sir. 205 00:21:27,240 --> 00:21:32,680 All right what happens now? Mrs. Nelson and I shall remain here to receive the messenger. 206 00:21:32,680 --> 00:21:36,680 You will retire to the rear with Mordecai. All right quickly now take him in back. 207 00:21:40,680 --> 00:21:45,880 Well he shoved me in the bedroom closet and locked the door and I heard his steps fade off a little 208 00:21:45,880 --> 00:21:51,080 probably to the bed across the room. The string hit me on the nose and I heard a sound. 209 00:21:51,080 --> 00:21:58,760 I heard his steps fade off a little probably to the bed across the room. The string hit me on the nose and I remembered the light in the closet. 210 00:21:59,880 --> 00:22:10,680 It was 8 15. The messenger would be here in a half hour maybe less. After that, I didn't want to think about after that so I tried to fix my mind on something else. 211 00:22:11,960 --> 00:22:17,240 That's when my eye lit on something lying next to a hat box in Harriet's side of the closet. 212 00:22:17,240 --> 00:22:24,280 It was a new hairdryer. For some reason or other this made me think of Captain and Mrs. Pearson. 213 00:22:33,160 --> 00:22:40,680 Doggone this thing. Limb dear it's as simple as A B C. Look. I don't know what happened Mary. All of a sudden 214 00:22:40,680 --> 00:22:49,640 a picture listed heavied apart and she began to spit at me. There's nothing to it. It's beyond me how you can drive a steamer Captain. 215 00:22:49,640 --> 00:22:57,480 Yet throw up your hands when it comes to a television. See this knob here. This is for sound and this is for your picture. 216 00:22:58,920 --> 00:23:09,240 Oh dear. You see that's what happened before. I don't understand it. Let me. Oh I know it's Mrs. Nelson. 217 00:23:09,240 --> 00:23:17,080 Is it. But it can't be. Can it. No I gave her our tickets. They're out. What are you talking about Mary. Her electric dryer does that. 218 00:23:17,080 --> 00:23:22,840 Maybe she changed her mind and stayed at home. I'll run right after. Forget it. No use raising a hobble over a little thing like that. 219 00:23:24,520 --> 00:23:31,240 How do you turn it off. Well here let me. The fights don't come on for an hour anyway. She'll likely have her hair dry by then. 220 00:23:31,240 --> 00:23:39,640 Funny they didn't go to the show. Maybe. If I'd known that. Maybe. What's the matter Lem. Wait wait don't turn it off. Let me listen. 221 00:23:49,160 --> 00:23:54,280 Ah there's the messenger. Now remember Mrs. Nelson not a sign. Not a move. Go ahead. 222 00:23:54,280 --> 00:24:04,680 Yes. Oswald G Nelson. Yes that's right. Happy prize money to you. Happy prize money to you. Happy prize money Mr. Oswald G Nelson. 223 00:24:04,680 --> 00:24:15,640 From the gold nugget people to you. Here's your package sir. Congratulations. Thank you. Who are those gentlemen with you. These bums. Oh these fellows are from the armored car people. 224 00:24:15,640 --> 00:24:22,840 Mr. Nelson for security reasons your name won't be released to the press until tomorrow afternoon. We suggest you go to the police station. 225 00:24:22,840 --> 00:24:31,240 Afternoon. We suggest you tell no one about this until the money is deposited. That's very sensible very. Thank you my good man. Thank you. Good night. Good night sir. 226 00:24:33,000 --> 00:24:36,680 Mordecai. Mordecai. We've got it. We've got it. 227 00:24:45,480 --> 00:24:52,280 Ozzie hold my hand will you. Sure. Shut up. Mordecai you bring the car around as quickly as possible understand. Yes sir. 228 00:24:52,280 --> 00:25:03,080 I don't want to seem nosy but where are we going. Mordecai and I are going to Cuba. What about us. Where are you going. Oh yes indeed. Well that's a good question. 229 00:25:03,080 --> 00:25:12,600 But perhaps a little beyond us don't you think. More a question for a metaphysician or a philosopher I should say. Yes. Now if you'll step out into the lobby we'll. 230 00:25:13,560 --> 00:25:21,880 Who's that. I don't know. Stand right there. Don't move. Let's I blow you to Davy Jones with this hair. See going 45. Ozzie it's Captain Pearson. 231 00:25:21,880 --> 00:25:25,160 Ozzie. Oh dear he's passed out. 232 00:25:34,280 --> 00:25:41,400 My stars Mrs Nelson you certainly lived a lifetime in the last hour. That clever husband of yours making a moss cold S.O.S. with that hair dryer. 233 00:25:41,400 --> 00:25:50,520 I get the shakes when I think how close we come to turning the television off. Me too. What's that man with Ozzie. I don't know. He come up just as lemon the officer took off in the patrol car. 234 00:25:50,520 --> 00:26:03,240 Oh would you excuse me for a minute. Mrs Pearson. Why Joel go ahead. What are they doing. I guess I figured it wrong then. I get two dollars and twenty five cents but if you say a dollar seventy nine well I guess you ought to know. 235 00:26:03,240 --> 00:26:15,960 Good. Shall I let you have it now. I just happen to have some spare change in my pocket. Yeah I guess I'll be all right. OK. There's a dollar fifty seventy five four. 236 00:26:15,960 --> 00:26:29,880 I make seventy nine right. Right. And here's your package all square. Oh square. Thanks a lot Mr Nelson. Good night. Good night. Ozzie you gave me the fifty eight thousand. Well sure everything settled now it's all square. Who was it. 237 00:26:29,880 --> 00:26:45,960 The income tax man. Oh no. Come on silly let's find a taxi. We've still got time to make the second act. 238 00:26:45,960 --> 00:26:59,000 Suspense presented by auto light tonight stars Ozzie and Harriet Nelson with Joseph Kearns playing Mr Diogenes. Ozzie I've been hearing you and Harriet on your H.J. Hines program the adventures of Ozzie and Harriet. 239 00:26:59,000 --> 00:27:29,000 Oh thanks. And we've been listening to suspense regularly. They want to quit while you're even Harlow. No no I want to tell you about auto light resistor spark plugs. Look out Ozzie the man's trying to sell you something. Oh no Harriet auto light resistor spark plugs sell themselves. Really. Oh and what do they need you for Harlow old boy. Yes you're talking yourself out of a job. Maybe I should have quit while I was even. Oh come on Harlow. Now we want you to keep on working. What else is there to tell about your auto light resistor spark plug. Well just this Ozzie they're one of more than 240 00:27:29,000 --> 00:27:58,920 400 products made by auto light for cars trucks planes and boats in 28 plants coast to coast. And these auto light products include complete electrical systems used as original equipment in many makes of America's finest cars battery spark plugs generators coils distributors starting motors and bullseye sealed beam headlights all engineered to fit together perfectly work together perfectly because they're a perfect team. So friends don't accept electrical parts supposed to be as good. Ask for and insist on auto light original factory parts at your neighborhood service station. 241 00:27:59,080 --> 00:28:03,640 Car dealer garage or repair shop. Remember you're always right with auto light. 242 00:28:08,760 --> 00:28:17,880 Next Thursday for suspense Rosalind Russell will be our star. The play is called consideration and it is as we say a tale well calculated to keep you in. 243 00:28:17,880 --> 00:28:42,440 Suspense tonight suspense play was produced and edited by William Spear and directed by Norman MacDonald music for suspense is composed by Lucian Morrowek and conducted by Lud Bluskin. Mr Diogenes is an original play for radio by Harold Swanton. In the coming weeks you will hear such stars as Kirk Douglas Marlena Dietrich and Richard Widmark. Don't forget next Thursday same time auto light will present suspense starring Rosalind Russell. 244 00:28:42,440 --> 00:28:55,800 You can buy auto light resistor or regular spark plugs auto light staple batteries auto light electrical parts at your neighborhood auto light dealers switch to auto light. Good night. 245 00:28:55,800 --> 00:29:11,960 From Maine to California and in far off overseas outposts the USO flag is flying once again. Those of us back home can now be sure that the USO is taking good care of our sons and brothers and loved ones on active duty with America's armed forces. 246 00:29:11,960 --> 00:29:26,840 This is CBS the Columbia Broadcasting System.