WEBVTT 00:00.000 --> 00:03.000 Suspense. 00:03.000 --> 00:12.500 Tonight, Mr. Keenan Wynn and Mr. Hume Cronin as stars of Double Entry, a suspense play 00:12.500 --> 00:19.000 produced, edited and directed by William Spear. 00:19.000 --> 00:33.000 Yep, it always balances in the double entry system. 00:33.000 --> 00:36.000 If it don't, you hang around till it does. 00:36.000 --> 00:39.000 It's what I've been doing all my life, keeping books. 00:39.000 --> 00:43.000 It's fascinating, positively fascinating. 00:43.000 --> 00:48.000 You know, I'll bet my day I've written billions of figures, hundreds of billions. 00:48.000 --> 00:50.000 And cash? 00:50.000 --> 00:55.000 Say, I've handled so much cash my fingertips are calloused. 00:55.000 --> 00:59.000 Once I even got water on a thumb from licking it to count money. 00:59.000 --> 01:01.000 But so what? 01:01.000 --> 01:02.000 What's cash? 01:02.000 --> 01:06.000 Handling cash is just the same as adding figures. 01:06.000 --> 01:10.000 A job. 01:10.000 --> 01:16.000 Then, one day, something happens that makes you look on things different. 01:16.000 --> 01:19.000 There's no excitement in an office. 01:19.000 --> 01:21.000 No danger. 01:21.000 --> 01:22.000 No heroism. 01:22.000 --> 01:23.000 No adventure. 01:23.000 --> 01:28.000 Not much chance to risk anything, you know, to do something for a pal. 01:28.000 --> 01:32.000 Behind an adding machine, you can't tell men from ice without a scorecard. 01:32.000 --> 01:40.000 So, if a guy gets in a jam, you know, and he gets a chance to do a favor to help a pal out who is in a jam, 01:40.000 --> 01:44.000 well, maybe you look on cash a little different. 01:44.000 --> 01:50.000 All of a sudden, cash is more than pieces of metal and bits of green paper. 01:50.000 --> 01:52.000 It's socially significant. 01:52.000 --> 01:54.000 That's what it is. 01:54.000 --> 01:57.000 Eddie, hand me the Dixie Cup, will you? 01:57.000 --> 01:58.000 Yeah. 01:58.000 --> 02:00.000 Your ulcer's bothering you again, Sam? 02:00.000 --> 02:02.000 Yeah, bad. 02:02.000 --> 02:04.000 These ledgers are driving me nuts. 02:04.000 --> 02:07.000 You got the wrong temperament for an account. 02:07.000 --> 02:09.000 You know, you shouldn't let it get you down. 02:09.000 --> 02:12.000 Things can't go on like this, Eddie. 02:12.000 --> 02:13.000 Hey, what's the matter? 02:13.000 --> 02:15.000 Alice? 02:15.000 --> 02:17.000 Alice don't understand you. 02:17.000 --> 02:19.000 No, Alice don't understand me. 02:19.000 --> 02:21.000 Well, that's because you don't understand her. 02:21.000 --> 02:23.000 Will you shut up? 02:23.000 --> 02:25.000 Sometimes you're so smug. 02:25.000 --> 02:28.000 Oh, now lay off, Sam. You can't go on like this. 02:28.000 --> 02:29.000 Like what? 02:29.000 --> 02:31.000 Well, you're grouchy all the time. 02:31.000 --> 02:33.000 You know, you've got something on your mind. 02:33.000 --> 02:35.000 Alice don't understand. 02:35.000 --> 02:37.000 Well, try me out. 02:37.000 --> 02:39.000 I won't throw no dishes at you. 02:39.000 --> 02:42.000 Well, no. 02:42.000 --> 02:43.000 No, I can't tell you. 02:43.000 --> 02:45.000 It wouldn't matter anyway. You can't do anything. 02:45.000 --> 02:48.000 Just telling your troubles helps sometime. 02:48.000 --> 02:50.000 Go on and talk, Sam. 02:50.000 --> 02:51.000 Uh-uh. 02:51.000 --> 02:52.000 Talk, Sam. 02:52.000 --> 02:53.000 Okay. 02:53.000 --> 02:55.000 Okay, it's the auditors. 02:55.000 --> 02:58.000 But them guys, I don't let them worry you. 02:58.000 --> 03:00.000 You're running this office, ain't you? 03:00.000 --> 03:02.000 Just tell them, don't let them tell you. 03:02.000 --> 03:04.000 I'm telling you, Eddie, they're getting awful close. 03:04.000 --> 03:06.000 What are you talking about? 03:06.000 --> 03:07.000 They're driving me nuts. 03:07.000 --> 03:10.000 Well, why, Sam? 03:10.000 --> 03:12.000 I'm light, Eddie. 03:12.000 --> 03:13.000 You mean? 03:13.000 --> 03:15.000 The books. 03:15.000 --> 03:16.000 They're light. 03:16.000 --> 03:18.000 They're short. 03:18.000 --> 03:20.000 You mean? 03:20.000 --> 03:23.000 I'm a crook, Eddie. 03:23.000 --> 03:24.000 An embezzler. 03:24.000 --> 03:26.000 And they're gonna get me. 03:26.000 --> 03:27.000 Those auditors, they're onto me. 03:27.000 --> 03:30.000 I know they are. I can feel them getting closer. 03:30.000 --> 03:33.000 Now, after nine years, they're on my trail. 03:33.000 --> 03:36.000 You're a crook, Sam? 03:36.000 --> 03:38.000 I don't believe it. 03:38.000 --> 03:39.000 I wish I was dreaming. 03:39.000 --> 03:42.000 Why, Sam, you're the fair-haired boy around here. 03:42.000 --> 03:44.000 All you gotta do is ask. 03:44.000 --> 03:45.000 Ask who? 03:45.000 --> 03:46.000 Bartholomew? 03:46.000 --> 03:47.000 That tight-haired... 03:47.000 --> 03:48.000 It's Alice. 03:48.000 --> 03:50.000 She's to blame, I know. 03:50.000 --> 03:52.000 She wasn't satisfied with your salary. 03:52.000 --> 03:56.000 She wanted ermine capes, diamonds, a box at the opera. 03:56.000 --> 03:59.000 Oh, I know. She drove you to it. 03:59.000 --> 04:01.000 Nine years. 04:01.000 --> 04:05.000 Hey, how much did you take in all that time? 04:05.000 --> 04:08.000 $100,000.11. 04:08.000 --> 04:10.000 Where am I gonna get that kind of money? 04:10.000 --> 04:12.000 I can dig up the 11 cents. 04:12.000 --> 04:15.000 Ah, wisecracks. That's all you're good for. 04:15.000 --> 04:17.000 Jail staring me in the face. 04:17.000 --> 04:19.000 Yeah, that's why you're so nervous. 04:19.000 --> 04:21.000 That's where my ulcers come from. 04:21.000 --> 04:23.000 Every night, working late, covering up. 04:23.000 --> 04:27.000 Sweating, worrying, thinking of suicide. 04:27.000 --> 04:29.000 Nine years ago. 04:29.000 --> 04:32.000 Well, she made you do it, Sam. 04:32.000 --> 04:33.000 That's right. 04:33.000 --> 04:35.000 I told her I was playing the market and I was. 04:35.000 --> 04:36.000 Yeah, but the stocks dropped. 04:36.000 --> 04:37.000 Out of sight. 04:37.000 --> 04:39.000 So you bought more. 04:39.000 --> 04:40.000 And more. 04:40.000 --> 04:41.000 And then? 04:41.000 --> 04:43.000 Yes, Mr. Betholomew? 04:43.000 --> 04:45.000 Send Craig again. 04:45.000 --> 04:46.000 My master's voice. 04:46.000 --> 04:49.000 Yeah, Betholomew wants to see you. 04:49.000 --> 04:51.000 Well, wag your tail, Fido. 04:51.000 --> 04:53.000 Wag it. Can't even drag it. 04:53.000 --> 04:58.000 Say, didn't I see the auditors go in there a minute ago? 04:58.000 --> 05:01.000 Yeah. Come to think of it, they did, Sam. 05:01.000 --> 05:04.000 Well, this is it, kid. 05:04.000 --> 05:06.000 Oh, maybe it's not, Sam. 05:06.000 --> 05:08.000 I got a feeling. 05:08.000 --> 05:10.000 I'm not scared, Eddie. 05:10.000 --> 05:11.000 It's a relief. 05:11.000 --> 05:13.000 I'll sleep nights now. 05:13.000 --> 05:16.000 Maybe my ulcer will clear up. 05:16.000 --> 05:18.000 A hundred grand. 05:20.000 --> 05:23.000 I wonder what he did with the 11 cents. 05:23.000 --> 05:25.000 Ah, sales tax, I guess. 05:25.000 --> 05:26.000 What a chum. 05:26.000 --> 05:28.000 Your name, Eddie? 05:28.000 --> 05:29.000 Well, yeah, what about it? 05:29.000 --> 05:30.000 What about it? Flint sent me. 05:30.000 --> 05:31.000 I'm Fink Martin. 05:31.000 --> 05:34.000 Flint said to drop in and see if you want to place a bet today. 05:34.000 --> 05:35.000 Flint who? 05:35.000 --> 05:37.000 What do you mean, Flint who? Mike Flint. 05:37.000 --> 05:38.000 Ain't your name, Eddie? 05:38.000 --> 05:40.000 Well, sure, but I never heard of Mike Flint. 05:40.000 --> 05:43.000 How you got the wrong Eddie? My name's Sullivan. 05:43.000 --> 05:45.000 Well, he didn't tell me no last name. How should I know? 05:45.000 --> 05:48.000 He says to look up Eddie in 411 Irving Trust Building. 05:48.000 --> 05:49.000 Oh, this is 511. 05:49.000 --> 05:51.000 Oh, for Pete's sake. 05:51.000 --> 05:54.000 Hey, wait a minute. 05:54.000 --> 05:58.000 You say you take bets on horses? 05:58.000 --> 06:01.000 I'll take a bet on a camel if he's running a tropical. 06:01.000 --> 06:03.000 Are you a bookie? 06:03.000 --> 06:05.000 Well, I ain't no taxidermist pal. 06:05.000 --> 06:07.000 Yeah. 06:07.000 --> 06:10.000 Hey, I may be the right Eddie after all. 06:10.000 --> 06:12.000 Got any odds? 06:12.000 --> 06:14.000 Well, if you're on the level, Eddie... 06:14.000 --> 06:17.000 When you're in the business, do I look like a stool pigeon? 06:17.000 --> 06:20.000 Okay, Eddie, I guess you're okay. 06:20.000 --> 06:22.000 Odds? You want odds, huh? 06:22.000 --> 06:24.000 Now, let's see here. 06:24.000 --> 06:27.000 Now, at Tropical Park, I can give you 10 to 1 in the first race. 06:27.000 --> 06:29.000 Horse called Aleppo. 06:29.000 --> 06:32.000 Finished last in the field of nine. That was his only other start. 06:32.000 --> 06:34.000 Let's see the form. 06:34.000 --> 06:37.000 You see, odds is okay if you don't bet too heavy. 06:37.000 --> 06:39.000 You play odds like a side bet, Eddie. 06:39.000 --> 06:41.000 The thing to play is the jockey, not the horse. 06:41.000 --> 06:43.000 You take Sylvester. Here's the jockey. 06:43.000 --> 06:46.000 Won three yesterday, two on Monday, one on Sunday. 06:46.000 --> 06:47.000 Oh, he's hot, hot, hot. 06:47.000 --> 06:49.000 He can ride any dog into the money. 06:49.000 --> 06:52.000 Does he ride a long shot today? 06:52.000 --> 06:56.000 No, no. Today he's got two favorites and four short odds nags. 06:56.000 --> 06:58.000 He'll win two races today. 06:58.000 --> 07:00.000 Oh, here's a 100 to one shot. 07:00.000 --> 07:02.000 Altruism. 07:02.000 --> 07:04.000 Altruism, huh? I never heard of him. 07:04.000 --> 07:06.000 I got a hunch. 07:06.000 --> 07:08.000 Well, play it, play it. Always play hunches. 07:08.000 --> 07:11.000 Now, let's see who this altruism is. 07:11.000 --> 07:13.000 Hmm. Mm-hmm. 07:13.000 --> 07:15.000 Never raced before. 07:15.000 --> 07:17.000 Well, and how do you know he's no good? 07:17.000 --> 07:19.000 Well, I don't, but look who he's running against. 07:19.000 --> 07:21.000 War alarm, unbeaten in three starts. 07:21.000 --> 07:24.000 Test tube, last year's gold cup runner-up. 07:24.000 --> 07:27.000 File clerk. Hey, hey, there's a hunch for you, Eddie. File clerk. 07:27.000 --> 07:31.000 I ain't no file clerk, and I'm playing altruism. 07:31.000 --> 07:34.000 Okay, okay, Eddie. Just give me a two bucks. 07:34.000 --> 07:36.000 Is, uh, is that all I can bet? 07:36.000 --> 07:40.000 Well, no, but gee, I don't want to play you for a sucker. 07:40.000 --> 07:42.000 How about a grand? 07:42.000 --> 07:45.000 Oh, why don't you tie that bull to a fence? 07:45.000 --> 07:47.000 Will you take a grand on altruism? 07:47.000 --> 07:49.000 Where would you get a grand? 07:49.000 --> 07:51.000 Oh, from the old man. 07:51.000 --> 07:53.000 On the level, Eddie? Oh, sure. 07:53.000 --> 07:56.000 Well, I have to get flints, okay. 07:56.000 --> 07:58.000 You want me to lose you to use your phone? Yeah. 07:58.000 --> 08:00.000 Gee, a grand. Oh-ho. 08:00.000 --> 08:02.000 That's not stage money, Eddie. 08:02.000 --> 08:04.000 Well, neither is a hundred grand. 08:04.000 --> 08:06.000 Could you pay off? 08:06.000 --> 08:08.000 Oh, Flint will cover any bet that I want to make. 08:08.000 --> 08:10.000 Hello? Hello, give me Flint. 08:10.000 --> 08:12.000 This is Flint. Smart cookie. 08:12.000 --> 08:14.000 Maybe he don't want to let... 08:14.000 --> 08:16.000 Hello, Mike? This is Fink. 08:16.000 --> 08:20.000 Yeah. Look, a man's got a thousand bucks he wants to put on an egg called altruism, 08:20.000 --> 08:22.000 and a third a tropical. 08:22.000 --> 08:24.000 The odds are 100 to one. How about it? 08:24.000 --> 08:26.000 Uh-huh. 08:26.000 --> 08:28.000 Yeah, but if he wins, Mike... 08:28.000 --> 08:30.000 Uh-huh. 08:30.000 --> 08:32.000 But sure I'm a gambler, but 100 grand... 08:32.000 --> 08:34.000 Hmm. 08:34.000 --> 08:36.000 Hung up. 08:36.000 --> 08:38.000 Funny guy, this Flint. Am I a gambler, he says. 08:38.000 --> 08:42.000 Okay, Eddie, we'll play one grand on altruism's nose for you. 08:42.000 --> 08:44.000 You will? 08:44.000 --> 08:46.000 What's the matter? Getting cold feet? 08:46.000 --> 08:48.000 Well, no, Martin. I just meant... 08:48.000 --> 08:52.000 Listen, that's a lot of dough to hand over to someone you've never seen before. 08:52.000 --> 08:54.000 Well, I never saw you before either, mister. 08:54.000 --> 08:56.000 Yeah, but what chance are you taking? 08:56.000 --> 08:58.000 Now quit stalling. Are you betting or not? 08:58.000 --> 09:00.000 Oh, okay. 09:00.000 --> 09:02.000 Wait till I get the money. 09:08.000 --> 09:10.000 Here it is. 09:10.000 --> 09:12.000 Ah, you got it? 09:12.000 --> 09:18.000 100, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, and ten makes one thousand. 09:18.000 --> 09:20.000 Thanks, Eddie. 09:20.000 --> 09:22.000 It's no matter what you're shaking for. 09:22.000 --> 09:24.000 Is this your life savings or something? 09:24.000 --> 09:26.000 Oh, no, no. 09:26.000 --> 09:28.000 There's lots more where this come from. 09:28.000 --> 09:30.000 Of course, of course. 09:30.000 --> 09:32.000 The old man has a lot of it behind his ear. 09:32.000 --> 09:34.000 Yeah, that's it, Frank. 09:34.000 --> 09:36.000 Hey, you're a card. 09:36.000 --> 09:40.000 Hey, what are you rubbing them bills on that sheet of white paper for? 09:40.000 --> 09:42.000 Well, if the green don't come off, the bill is no good. 09:42.000 --> 09:44.000 No good? 09:44.000 --> 09:46.000 Counterfeit. Hey, look at this. A phony. 09:46.000 --> 09:48.000 You better tell your old man to give you another one. 09:48.000 --> 09:50.000 Is this counterfeit? 09:50.000 --> 09:52.000 Certainly. Look at General Grant. 09:52.000 --> 09:54.000 His nose shouldn't happen to Jimmy Durante. 09:54.000 --> 09:56.000 Yeah, well, wait a minute, Frank. 09:56.000 --> 09:58.000 Oh, what a setup. 09:58.000 --> 10:00.000 Just like that. 10:00.000 --> 10:04.000 Give me a grand, Pop. I got a hunch my ship is coming in at Miami this afternoon. 10:04.000 --> 10:06.000 What a setup. 10:06.000 --> 10:08.000 Hey, I think. 10:08.000 --> 10:10.000 Thanks, Eddie. That's more like it. 10:10.000 --> 10:12.000 You tell your old man to pass that phony C-note in church. 10:12.000 --> 10:14.000 Well, here's my card and here's your ticket. 10:14.000 --> 10:16.000 Now you hang on to that. Might be worth a hundred grand. 10:16.000 --> 10:18.000 Okay, Martin. 10:18.000 --> 10:20.000 Hey, hey, hey. 10:20.000 --> 10:22.000 Are you all right? You look kind of green. 10:22.000 --> 10:24.000 Oh, you've just been looking at too much dough, Martin. 10:24.000 --> 10:26.000 Well, maybe. 10:26.000 --> 10:28.000 Okay, you drop around this afternoon all about three. 10:28.000 --> 10:30.000 Your dog is running in. 10:30.000 --> 10:32.000 And just call me think. 10:32.000 --> 10:34.000 Well, sir, I'm going to go. 10:34.000 --> 10:36.000 I'll see you later. 10:36.000 --> 10:38.000 I'll see you later. 10:38.000 --> 10:40.000 I'll see you later. 10:40.000 --> 10:42.000 Just call me think. 10:42.000 --> 10:44.000 So long, think. 10:44.000 --> 10:46.000 So long, Eddie. 10:46.000 --> 10:48.000 Hello? 10:48.000 --> 10:50.000 Sullivan, this is Mr. Bartholomew. 10:50.000 --> 10:52.000 Yes, sir. Speak up! 10:52.000 --> 10:54.000 Yes, sir! That's better, Sullivan. 10:54.000 --> 10:58.000 Sullivan, I want you to send a nice new hundred dollar bill to St. Paul's Church in Skarsdale. 10:58.000 --> 11:02.000 A Christmas gift. Put it in a plain envelope and write Joyox Noel on it. 11:02.000 --> 11:06.000 Wrap it in a piece of paper so no one will know what it is at the post office. 11:06.000 --> 11:09.000 I want to send a nice little anonymous gift as a surprise. 11:09.000 --> 11:11.000 Nice crisp hundred dollar bill. 11:11.000 --> 11:13.000 Oh, I know just the one, Mr. Bartholomew. 11:13.000 --> 11:15.000 What's that? Yes, sir! 11:15.000 --> 11:17.000 Hey, Eddie. Eddie, it's okay. 11:17.000 --> 11:19.000 I got by. What? 11:19.000 --> 11:21.000 I'm clear. The auditors missed it. 11:21.000 --> 11:23.000 Hey, what's the matter? 11:23.000 --> 11:26.000 Aren't you glad? You mean you ain't going to jail? 11:26.000 --> 11:28.000 Not this year. 11:28.000 --> 11:30.000 Are you sure, Sam? Positive. 11:30.000 --> 11:33.000 The auditors are through. Not a chance of getting caught. 11:33.000 --> 11:36.000 Not a chance, Sam? Not a chance, Eddie. 11:36.000 --> 11:39.000 Well, there could be a slip-up. 11:39.000 --> 11:41.000 No, there couldn't. 11:41.000 --> 11:43.000 What's the matter with you? Say, aren't you glad? 11:43.000 --> 11:46.000 Oh, sure, sure. Look, I'm doing handsprings. 11:46.000 --> 11:48.000 Boy, oh boy. 11:48.000 --> 11:51.000 Of course, it doesn't solve things completely. 11:51.000 --> 11:53.000 Yeah, you said it. I'm still short. 11:53.000 --> 11:56.000 But that's okay. Oh, sure. 11:56.000 --> 11:58.000 I'll think of something. I got a whole year. 11:58.000 --> 12:00.000 Oh, I'm very glad. 12:00.000 --> 12:02.000 Don't get it, though. 12:02.000 --> 12:04.000 Bartholomew, you're buttering me up. 12:04.000 --> 12:06.000 He says we know everything's in good shape, Sam. 12:06.000 --> 12:08.000 No use putting those auditors to any more trouble. 12:08.000 --> 12:11.000 Just have him check the cash, and that'll wind it up. 12:11.000 --> 12:13.000 The cash? 12:13.000 --> 12:17.000 Sam, will you hand me that Dixie cup by the typewriter? 12:17.000 --> 12:19.000 Sure. You dry? 12:19.000 --> 12:21.000 Very. 12:21.000 --> 12:24.000 Say, say what's on your mind? 12:24.000 --> 12:26.000 Just two or three years. 12:26.000 --> 12:27.000 That's all. 12:27.000 --> 12:30.000 Now I suppose you're going to tell me that you've been swiping postage stamps. 12:30.000 --> 12:33.000 Oh, no, no. Nothing as bad as that. 12:33.000 --> 12:37.000 Look, I'm your pal, Sam. 12:37.000 --> 12:38.000 Sure. 12:38.000 --> 12:41.000 I'd do anything for you. 12:41.000 --> 12:43.000 I know, Eddie. Then talk sense. 12:43.000 --> 12:48.000 Well, I hated to think of you and Sing Sing for six months, Sam, so... 12:48.000 --> 12:51.000 I'm going there myself for a few years. 12:51.000 --> 12:53.000 What are you saying? 12:53.000 --> 12:58.000 I swiped a thousand bucks and bet it on a hundred to one shot at Tropical Park, Sam. 12:58.000 --> 13:01.000 You swiped? Oh, no. 13:01.000 --> 13:03.000 Oh, no. 13:03.000 --> 13:05.000 Eddie, you're kidding me. 13:05.000 --> 13:07.000 I did it for you, Sam. 13:07.000 --> 13:10.000 A guy don't get a chance to prove his friendship very often. 13:10.000 --> 13:12.000 Friendship? 13:12.000 --> 13:15.000 You talk to me of friendship at a time like this? 13:15.000 --> 13:18.000 Oh, we might as well be in Sing Sing right now. 13:18.000 --> 13:20.000 Yeah, and me the longest. 13:20.000 --> 13:23.000 I hope so, of all the dumb tricks. 13:23.000 --> 13:25.000 Didn't make any entries, I suppose. 13:25.000 --> 13:27.000 Nope. I just took it. 13:27.000 --> 13:29.000 How'd you come to bed on a horse? 13:29.000 --> 13:31.000 What bookies do you know? 13:31.000 --> 13:34.000 Here's his carty. He just happened in by accident. 13:34.000 --> 13:37.000 A ten-ton truck should just happen in by accident and run over you. 13:37.000 --> 13:40.000 Well, maybe he'd give it back, Sam. 13:40.000 --> 13:42.000 Oh, sure. Sure, bookies are that way. 13:42.000 --> 13:44.000 Philanthropists, all of them. 13:44.000 --> 13:46.000 There's probably no such address as this. 13:46.000 --> 13:48.000 Don't be hard on me, will you, Sam? 13:48.000 --> 13:51.000 After all, I risked my own neck to save yours. 13:51.000 --> 13:53.000 No greater love. 13:53.000 --> 13:55.000 Maybe this horse will win. 13:55.000 --> 13:57.000 Well... Oh, shut up. 13:57.000 --> 13:59.000 Take an entry in the books. 13:59.000 --> 14:02.000 Then we'll pay Mr. Fink Martin a call. 14:02.000 --> 14:03.000 Friendship. 14:03.000 --> 14:05.000 Yeah, yeah, friendship. 14:05.000 --> 14:07.000 Well, we're in this together, pal. 14:07.000 --> 14:11.000 THE WINDOW 14:24.000 --> 14:27.000 On the subway up to the bookies' place, I didn't say a word. 14:27.000 --> 14:31.000 I just stared at the ads and I kept thinking of how I'd messed things up 14:31.000 --> 14:33.000 and wondered what Sam was thinking. 14:33.000 --> 14:36.000 The window we sat near had bars on it 14:36.000 --> 14:39.000 and I felt like I was already in jail. 14:39.000 --> 14:41.000 Well, we got there. 14:41.000 --> 14:43.000 It was a great big lodge room. 14:44.000 --> 14:47.000 Well, well, if it ain't the millionaire bookkeeper. 14:47.000 --> 14:49.000 Hi, Eddie. Hiya there, Fink. 14:49.000 --> 14:51.000 Welcome to our humble joint. 14:51.000 --> 14:53.000 Of course, it ain't like hi, Elia, but... 14:53.000 --> 14:55.000 But it's as close as we can get to it in New York. 14:55.000 --> 14:56.000 Yeah, I know. 14:56.000 --> 14:58.000 Oh, this is Sam Crockett, Fink, and my boss. 14:58.000 --> 15:00.000 Oh, glad to meet you, Mr. Crockett. 15:00.000 --> 15:02.000 Smart man you got working for you. 15:02.000 --> 15:05.000 He's gonna make himself a pile of dough this afternoon, ain't you, Eddie? 15:05.000 --> 15:07.000 Martin, this is all a mistake. 15:07.000 --> 15:10.000 Eddie had no business betting $1,000 on a horse. 15:10.000 --> 15:12.000 The fact is, he wasn't his money. 15:12.000 --> 15:14.000 Oh, I know that. It was his old man's. 15:14.000 --> 15:16.000 He stole it from the company. 15:16.000 --> 15:19.000 Now, Eddie, would you do a thing like that? 15:19.000 --> 15:20.000 Uh-huh. 15:20.000 --> 15:23.000 Well, I am surprised. I thought your old man ran the place. 15:23.000 --> 15:25.000 He was trying to help someone, so... 15:25.000 --> 15:27.000 So he helped himself to a thousand bucks, huh? 15:27.000 --> 15:30.000 Martin, give us a break and return the money. 15:30.000 --> 15:32.000 We'll both go to jail if we don't put it back. 15:32.000 --> 15:37.000 Atropical clock in the sixth. Scratch dough boy, number 624. 15:37.000 --> 15:41.000 Gee, I'm sorry, fellas, but I can't do nothing about it. 15:41.000 --> 15:44.000 I've turned in the dough already. I just work here. I can't get it back. 15:44.000 --> 15:46.000 You gotta help us, Martin. 15:46.000 --> 15:49.000 Well, I'd like to, Crockett, but gee, how can I? 15:49.000 --> 15:50.000 Look, this is a business. 15:50.000 --> 15:53.000 Suppose when I ask the boss, he says it's a contract. 15:53.000 --> 15:55.000 He can't back out, neither can you. 15:55.000 --> 15:57.000 Where would we be if we asked you to take your money back? 15:57.000 --> 15:59.000 Yeah, but don't you see, we'll go to sing-sing-fink. 15:59.000 --> 16:02.000 One minute to post time for the third atropical place. 16:02.000 --> 16:03.000 You bet's not boring. 16:03.000 --> 16:05.000 Look, look, look, maybe those bills will counterfeit, huh? 16:05.000 --> 16:07.000 You know, you can tell the cashier the dough's no good, huh? 16:07.000 --> 16:10.000 Well, how can I, Eddie? He can spot a phony from 50 yards. 16:10.000 --> 16:12.000 The auditors are checking our books now, Martin. 16:12.000 --> 16:16.000 Well, all I can say is I'm sorry and, well, I hope this nag wins for you, but... 16:16.000 --> 16:17.000 We're at the station with third atropical park. 16:17.000 --> 16:19.000 I can't do a thing about it. 16:19.000 --> 16:21.000 I'm sunk, Eddie. 16:23.000 --> 16:25.000 You sounded like you meant it, huh? 16:25.000 --> 16:27.000 Well, so what? Let's go. 16:27.000 --> 16:30.000 Well, ain't you interested in hearing the race over the loudspeaker? 16:30.000 --> 16:31.000 No. 16:31.000 --> 16:34.000 Well, I am. It's me that started this whole thing, and I'm gonna get my money's worth. 16:34.000 --> 16:38.000 Atropical and the third are correction. Sylvester is riding altruism. 16:38.000 --> 16:39.000 Hey, hey, did you hear that, Sam? 16:39.000 --> 16:40.000 You mean we got a jockey? 16:40.000 --> 16:44.000 Oh, now don't be funny. This guy Sylvester's hot. He's winning two or three races a day. 16:44.000 --> 16:47.000 Atropical and the third are away at 317. 16:47.000 --> 16:48.000 Hey, they're off! 16:48.000 --> 16:49.000 I got ears. 16:49.000 --> 16:52.000 At the quarter, it's a wall along by ahead. 16:52.000 --> 16:57.000 Dive Bomber is second, Calumet Palace third by a half a length. 16:57.000 --> 17:01.000 Dunin is fourth, Westwood Ho is fifth, 17:01.000 --> 17:06.000 Fyle Clerk is sixth, and Valiant Net seventh. 17:06.000 --> 17:09.000 The Mashingniblick is eighth, Dimitsole is ninth, 17:09.000 --> 17:18.000 Golden West is tenth, and Test Tube Auction Block early riser, and altruism. 17:18.000 --> 17:21.000 No wonder you got a hundred to one. There's a hundred horses. 17:21.000 --> 17:24.000 Yeah, that's not a race. It's a caravan. 17:24.000 --> 17:26.000 Last place. Now, are you satisfied? 17:26.000 --> 17:27.000 Okay, Sam, let's go. 17:27.000 --> 17:31.000 Man o' war couldn't win in a crowd like that unless he cut across the infield. 17:31.000 --> 17:32.000 Oh, you sure pick him. 17:32.000 --> 17:34.000 Well, come on. What are you waiting for? 17:34.000 --> 17:36.000 I'm not waiting. Hey, quit pushing me. 17:36.000 --> 17:37.000 Am I pushing you? 17:37.000 --> 17:41.000 At the half, it's Valiant Net by a length. Wall along is second by two. 17:41.000 --> 17:48.000 Test Tube is third by a nose. Dive Bomber is fourth, and Dunin is fifth. 17:48.000 --> 18:00.000 The Calumet Pal, Westwood Ho, Fyle Clerk, Dimitsole, Golden West, early riser, Mashingniblick, and altruism. 18:00.000 --> 18:02.000 Auction Block has dropped out. 18:02.000 --> 18:04.000 That nag has taken the pause that refreshes. 18:04.000 --> 18:05.000 Well, he's come up. 18:05.000 --> 18:07.000 If enough drop out, he can win. 18:07.000 --> 18:09.000 Yeah, the race had had the last two days, huh? 18:09.000 --> 18:10.000 Why didn't they run it in heats? 18:10.000 --> 18:13.000 Well, might as well hang around till the end, huh, Sam? 18:13.000 --> 18:14.000 Oh, well, I guess so. 18:14.000 --> 18:26.000 It's Valiant Net still leading by a length. Test Tube is second by a nose. Wall along is third, and coming up on the outside is altruism. 18:26.000 --> 18:28.000 Hey, did he say altruism? 18:28.000 --> 18:29.000 He said it. Get the results. 18:29.000 --> 18:30.000 Hey, Porky, how about the finish? 18:30.000 --> 18:31.000 Coming over the wire now. 18:31.000 --> 18:34.000 Oh, Sylvester, Sylvester, ride, boy, ride. 18:34.000 --> 18:36.000 Don't wring your hands. It's too late to pray. The race is over. 18:36.000 --> 18:37.000 Yeah, well, who won? 18:37.000 --> 18:40.000 How do I know who won? The wire's always a minute behind. 18:40.000 --> 18:41.000 We've got a chance. 18:41.000 --> 18:44.000 Too close for comfort. Oh, why did Flint let me take that bet? 18:44.000 --> 18:50.000 The winner of the third at Tropical Park is altruism. 18:50.000 --> 18:53.000 Oh, how do you like that? 18:53.000 --> 18:54.000 He won. 18:54.000 --> 18:55.000 Am I a champ now? 18:55.000 --> 18:57.000 Oh, you're a champ, Eddie, a champ. 18:57.000 --> 19:00.000 Oh, it was nothing, Sam. Only a sap could do it. 19:00.000 --> 19:01.000 Oh, thanks. 19:01.000 --> 19:03.000 Holy smoke, this doesn't. 19:03.000 --> 19:06.000 Oh, Fink, I almost forgot. You've got a fork over. 19:06.000 --> 19:09.000 Oh, that just about busts this joint. Hey, how about calling it off? 19:09.000 --> 19:12.000 Remember what you said about contracts? 19:12.000 --> 19:15.000 Yeah, but gee, if I'd have known they were switching Sylvester onto that dog. 19:15.000 --> 19:16.000 When do we get paid off? 19:16.000 --> 19:19.000 Right now, Crockett. Come on, come on over to Cashier. 19:19.000 --> 19:21.000 Cash? Do we have to take cash? 19:21.000 --> 19:23.000 Oh, absolutely. We ain't got no bank account. 19:23.000 --> 19:26.000 First thing you know, we'd have to pay income tax. 19:26.000 --> 19:27.000 Well, you can deduct this loss. 19:27.000 --> 19:29.000 Yeah. All right, give me your ticket. 19:29.000 --> 19:30.000 Here. 19:30.000 --> 19:34.000 Here's a cashier at this window. 100 grand, Speed. 19:34.000 --> 19:37.000 Hey, the cashier don't bat an eye. I'm gonna... 19:37.000 --> 19:40.000 Hey, the cops! Cops, see you later! 19:52.000 --> 19:54.000 The cops jugged everyone in the place. 19:54.000 --> 19:58.000 Fink and the other gamblers got away with the 100 grand. 19:58.000 --> 20:01.000 And we had to wait until morning for a trial. 20:01.000 --> 20:04.000 Every silver lining has a rip in it. 20:04.000 --> 20:07.000 I don't see how they got away. 20:07.000 --> 20:09.000 I'm sore. 20:09.000 --> 20:12.000 We sit here in the can and they're off with all that dough. 20:12.000 --> 20:15.000 Well, we were framed. This whole thing was planned. 20:15.000 --> 20:18.000 You're crazy. How did Martin know altruism would win? 20:18.000 --> 20:20.000 Can't turn on a police raid like a shower bath. 20:20.000 --> 20:22.000 Well, how are we ever gonna find those guys? 20:22.000 --> 20:25.000 We won't. And if we do, it won't do us any good, 20:25.000 --> 20:27.000 because you haven't got the ticket anymore. 20:27.000 --> 20:29.000 Even if you have, you couldn't force them to pay. 20:29.000 --> 20:31.000 Gambling isn't legal, you know. 20:31.000 --> 20:33.000 Oh, that's nice, dreary music. 20:33.000 --> 20:35.000 Might as well get used to it. 20:35.000 --> 20:38.000 We'll be living in quarters like this for quite some time. 20:38.000 --> 20:40.000 Hey, here comes the keeper. 20:40.000 --> 20:42.000 You got a visitor, boys? 20:42.000 --> 20:43.000 An auditor. 20:43.000 --> 20:45.000 Name a Martin. Fink Martin. 20:45.000 --> 20:46.000 Hiya, boys. 20:46.000 --> 20:48.000 Well, you coming to pay us off? 20:48.000 --> 20:50.000 Well, not exactly. No. 20:50.000 --> 20:53.000 You see, Mike, the boss, he don't want to pay. 20:53.000 --> 20:56.000 You wouldn't chisel, Fink. Oh, no. 20:56.000 --> 20:59.000 On the level. I thought this guy Flint was square. 20:59.000 --> 21:01.000 Now he's welshin' on all his debts and he's blowin' town. 21:01.000 --> 21:03.000 He's got a grand of mind. 21:03.000 --> 21:05.000 Oh, that's a great story, Martin. 21:05.000 --> 21:07.000 Well, I don't have to tell stories, do I? 21:07.000 --> 21:09.000 I could've stayed away from here, Crockett. 21:09.000 --> 21:11.000 It's nice to see you again, Fink. 21:11.000 --> 21:13.000 Still taking bets? 21:13.000 --> 21:14.000 All right. 21:14.000 --> 21:16.000 Well, let's shut you up, Eddie. 21:16.000 --> 21:18.000 Hey, a thousand bucks? 21:18.000 --> 21:20.000 Yeah, a thousand bucks. It's all I got. 21:20.000 --> 21:21.000 It's my own dough. 21:21.000 --> 21:23.000 Well, that's the best I can do, Eddie. 21:23.000 --> 21:25.000 Hey, guard, let me outta here. 21:25.000 --> 21:27.000 Gee, I don't know what to say, Fink. 21:27.000 --> 21:29.000 Say no to the next bookie you meet, Eddie. 21:29.000 --> 21:31.000 Eggs is poison. 21:31.000 --> 21:33.000 Well, it was fun for a while, Fink. 21:33.000 --> 21:35.000 I wouldn't take your dough, but... 21:35.000 --> 21:36.000 Say no more. 21:36.000 --> 21:38.000 Put it back where it came from, Sam. 21:38.000 --> 21:40.000 And try to forget you ever seen me. 21:50.000 --> 21:53.000 So, there I was, back where I started at scratch. 21:53.000 --> 21:56.000 All I had to do was put the dough back in the cash drawer. 21:56.000 --> 21:58.000 The next morning, after paying a $10 fine, 21:58.000 --> 22:00.000 we took the subway downtown. 22:00.000 --> 22:04.000 Sam read the paper, and I just stared at the ads as usual. 22:05.000 --> 22:07.000 Quite a story about altruism. 22:07.000 --> 22:09.000 Picture a Sylvester here, just a kid. 22:09.000 --> 22:11.000 19, weighs 105. 22:11.000 --> 22:13.000 Hey, look at that ad. 22:13.000 --> 22:15.000 It says, spell it backwards. 22:15.000 --> 22:17.000 If they want you to read it that way, 22:17.000 --> 22:19.000 why don't they turn it around? 22:19.000 --> 22:21.000 Hey, Eddie. Eddie, look. 22:21.000 --> 22:22.000 Well, what is it, Sam? 22:22.000 --> 22:24.000 This picture. It's Bartholomew. 22:24.000 --> 22:27.000 They've arrested him. Well, what for? 22:27.000 --> 22:28.000 Embezzlement. 22:28.000 --> 22:30.000 But that's you, Sam. 22:30.000 --> 22:31.000 Listen to this. 22:31.000 --> 22:35.000 Mr. Bartholomew confessed to having embezzled company funds 22:35.000 --> 22:37.000 to the tune of a quarter of a million dollars, 22:37.000 --> 22:41.000 when auditors discovered a shortage in cash of $1,000. 22:41.000 --> 22:44.000 So that's why he was hurrying those guys around. 22:44.000 --> 22:46.000 Well, let me see. What a business. 22:46.000 --> 22:48.000 Everyone in it is a crook. 22:48.000 --> 22:50.000 Hey, Sam, where you going? 22:50.000 --> 22:52.000 Back to the police station. I'm giving myself up. 22:52.000 --> 22:54.000 Giving yourself up? You're nuts! 22:54.000 --> 22:57.000 Oh, Eddie, I'd never sleep again if I escaped scot-free. 22:57.000 --> 23:00.000 Besides, I'd like to get away from Alice for about six months. 23:00.000 --> 23:02.000 Yeah, but Sam! 23:16.000 --> 23:20.000 So, Sam went to the police and gave himself up. 23:20.000 --> 23:22.000 But guess what? 23:22.000 --> 23:25.000 They didn't want him. They already had their man. 23:25.000 --> 23:27.000 He wrote out a confession. 23:27.000 --> 23:30.000 He offered to show it in the books, but they just laughed at him. 23:30.000 --> 23:32.000 Called him a publicity seeker. 23:32.000 --> 23:34.000 He pleaded with him, but it was no use. 23:34.000 --> 23:36.000 Even Bartholomew called him a fool. 23:36.000 --> 23:39.000 Imagine, Sam fought for the right to go to prison, 23:39.000 --> 23:41.000 and they laughed at him. 23:41.000 --> 23:44.000 Well, that's what happens when a bookkeeper tries to get out of the rut. 23:44.000 --> 23:46.000 There's no escape. 23:47.000 --> 23:48.000 Yeah. 23:48.000 --> 23:52.000 Sam would have preferred a few quiet months in Sing Sing, breaking rocks. 23:52.000 --> 23:54.000 Could have got rid of his ulcers. 23:54.000 --> 23:56.000 He would have got away from Alice. 23:56.000 --> 23:58.000 But no. 24:05.000 --> 24:08.000 Hey, Eddie. Hand me that Dixie cup, will you? 24:08.000 --> 24:10.000 Oh, your ulcers bothering you again, Sam? 24:10.000 --> 24:12.000 Yeah, something awful. 24:12.000 --> 24:18.000 These ledgers are driving me nuts. 24:18.000 --> 24:34.000 This is the Armed Forces Radio Service. 24:48.000 --> 24:52.000 The Armed Forces Radio Service 25:18.000 --> 25:22.000 The Armed Forces Radio Service