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The Columbia Network takes pleasure in bringing you Suspense.

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Suspense, a new series of programs with one strict purpose in view, your entertainment.

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Each week at this time, CBS sets aside 30 minutes to excite you, to mystify you, and

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on occasion to horrify you with a catalog of the world's great thrillers.

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Dramas from the stage and screen, from fiction and radio.

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Dramas that bring you Suspense.

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This, the second offering of a new series, is a unique one.

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Certainly it is one of the very few pieces of Suspense literature that somehow manages

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to tickle your funny bone while busily engaged in tingling your spine.

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Make no mistake though, nobody's kidding.

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CBS presents its adaptation of John Collier's well-known short story, Wet Saturday.

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Yes it's a wet Saturday.

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Never saw it rain harder.

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I'm Princey, Frederick Princey, just an ordinary family man.

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I have a son, a daughter, and a wife.

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Might be out golfing now if it hadn't been for the rain.

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Hi Mrs. Princey, I plan to drive over to the nurseries this afternoon for some arbiters,

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the boarders you know, but...

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Oh, the whole lot of them make me sick.

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Yes, I'm George, sun and air.

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I had a date to go punting.

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Puntings.

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Couldn't find the blasted punting as weather, so I'm home too.

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I...

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I'm Millicent.

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I was going to play croquet.

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That's how I happened to have a mallet.

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Yes that's the Princey family.

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We find them at home, Mrs. Princey, Millicent, George sprawled on a couch, Mr. Princey biting

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on a dry pipe.

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Their living room is dull and overstuffed.

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Rain beats at the windows.

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They are any middle class family at home on a wet day, except for one small item.

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As you sit with them in the living room, you can see through the door to the sun porch

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a pair of men's feet encased in black boots.

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They look like the feet of a curate.

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There's a tenseness in the room.

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The air is charged with excitement, but the feet are very still.

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Don't keep staring at them.

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Listen to me, all of you.

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Don't you see?

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They hang her.

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That's what they do.

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They hang her.

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Oh Fred, it's too awful.

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Awful?

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It's catastrophic.

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A supposedly sweet, gentle, intelligent girl, respected, loved by the whole village, doing

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a thing like this.

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Think of the publicity, the disgrace.

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You think I'm going to resign from the bench, the vestry, sell out and live in some foggy

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hotel abroad?

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Oh no, no.

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I'll kill myself.

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I will.

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I will.

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Don't be a fool.

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Any more than you have been, the Governor means.

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Be quiet.

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It wouldn't be so bad if it were you.

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Everybody in the village knows you're not responsible.

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George.

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Yes?

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Get off that couch.

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Sit up on your spine.

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You might be of a little use here, if you could think.

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Listen, Governor, this isn't my funeral.

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Oh, shut up.

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As long as I can remember, George, you've been a trial and a tribulation to me.

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Oh, I can't stand it.

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I can't stand it.

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You've got to stand it, my dear.

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And keep that hysterical note out of your voice.

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Do you hear?

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Yes.

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We, uh, we are talking about the weather.

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Now, George.

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Yeah?

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George, if he fell down the old well, say, striking his head several times, what about

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it, eh?

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I really don't know, Governor.

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What about it?

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Don't be an ass.

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I'm asking you to think.

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He'd have had to hit the side several times in 30 or 40 feet and at all the correct angles.

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Now, now, I'm afraid not.

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I'm afraid not.

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We'll have to go over it all again, Millicent.

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Oh, no, Father.

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No, no.

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I couldn't.

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I couldn't.

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Millicent, we must go over it all again.

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Oh, Fred, you're torturing her.

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Oh, face facts, Mater, with him lying there.

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That's no use pretending it's a picnic.

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They might hang you, Millicent.

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Oh, stop that shaking.

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Stop it here.

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You must stop it.

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You must keep your voice quiet.

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Millicent, we are talking of the weather.

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Now, we will proceed.

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I can't.

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I can't.

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Not without boots there.

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Oh, you should have thought of those boots, Millicent.

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I'm not moving them.

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Oh, sit up, George.

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Stop shuffling your feet.

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Now, Millicent, look at me.

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Answer me truthfully, you hear?

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Answer me.

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You were in the croquet course.

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Yes.

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Who knew you were in love with this wretched curate?

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Oh, the whole village.

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They've been sniggering about it at the pub for three years past.

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What a filthy mess.

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Millicent, we continue.

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You were on the croquet course.

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You were putting the croquet set into its box.

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Yes.

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It was starting to rain.

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I was carrying the balls and mallets into the sun porch.

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The box was there.

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You heard someone enter the garden gate and come across the yard.

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Yes.

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Could you see who it was?

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Oh, not at first.

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I was going into the sun porch.

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I threw down all the mallets at the red one and turned around.

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It was Withers?

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Yes.

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So you called him?

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Yes.

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Loudly?

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Did you call him loudly?

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Could anyone have heard?

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No, Father, I'm sure not.

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I didn't really call him.

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I just spoke his name.

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He saw me as I went to the door.

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He just waved his hand and he came over.

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How can I find out from you whether there was anywhere about whether he could have been

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seen?

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I'm sure not, Father.

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I'm quite sure.

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So you both went into the sun porch.

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Yes.

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It was raining hard then.

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What did he say?

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He said, hello, Millie.

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And excuse his coming in the back way, but he set out to walk over to Lisbon.

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Yes.

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He said, passing the park, he'd seen the house, and suddenly thought of me.

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And he thought he'd just look in for a moment.

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He had something to tell me.

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Go on.

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He said he was so happy.

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He wanted me to share it.

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He'd heard from the bishop he was to have a vicarage.

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And it wasn't only that.

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It meant he could marry, but then he began to get all confused.

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And of course, I thought he meant me.

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Don't tell me what you thought.

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Tell me exactly what he said, nothing else.

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Well, well, oh dear.

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Oh, stop crying.

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It's a luxury you can no longer afford.

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Tell me what happened.

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He said, no.

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He said it wasn't me.

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It's Ella Bregdon Davis.

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And he was sorry.

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And all that.

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Then he went to go.

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And then?

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I went mad.

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He turned his back.

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I had the red mallet of the croquet fit in my hand.

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I forgot to drop it in the box when he came.

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Did you shout or scream?

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I mean, as you hit him?

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No.

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I'm sure I didn't.

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Did he?

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Come on, speak up.

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No, Father.

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And then?

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I threw it down.

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I came straight in here.

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I went to look for Mother.

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Oh, God.

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My poor baby.

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No.

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No, I don't leave the child alone, Fred.

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Not such a child, Mater.

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Milly, I had no idea you had...

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Keep quiet.

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I'm thinking.

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You see, George, he probably told people he was going to listen.

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Certainly no one knows he came here, for he didn't decide until he crossed the park.

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He might have been attacked in the woods.

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We must consider every detail.

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A curate with his head battered in.

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Don't, Father.

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Don't.

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A curate, head, battered in.

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Now, who would want to kill with us?

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Who would kill with us?

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Well, I would with pleasure.

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How do you do, Milly, Princy?

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Captain, Captain Smarter.

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Oh, sit down, pray.

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You mustn't get up for me, Mrs. Princy.

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You either, Milly.

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My word.

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Just being neighborly on a bad day.

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I wanted to ask you about those denier bulbs, Princy.

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Took a short cut on account of the rain and walked right in.

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Knew you wouldn't mind.

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Oh, you have a good eye.

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I'm not a doctor.

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I'm a doctor.

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I'm a doctor.

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I'm a doctor.

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I'm a doctor.

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I'm a doctor.

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I'm a doctor.

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I'm a doctor.

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I'm a doctor.

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I'm a doctor.

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I'm a doctor.

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I'm a doctor.

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My dear, we can all have our little jokes.

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Don't pretend to be shocked.

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This way, Smarter.

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This chair facing the fireplace.

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Sit down, mother.

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Just straightening the curtains to the sun porch, dear.

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It looks so gloomy out there.

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I might as well shut the rain out.

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Just talking about the little theoretical cure-it-killing, Smarter.

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You know, I could never have imagined it.

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It seems to me it's a great thing.

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killing Smalley. You know, young people these days like thrillers.

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Parsonicide. Justifiable parsonicide. If you heard about Ella Bragdon, Davis, I

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should be most properly laughed at. Why? Why should you be laughed at, Smalley?

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No, and a shot in that direction myself. She half said yes, too.

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Haven't you heard? She told most people. Now it'll look as if I got turned down for a

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white rat in a dog collar. Oh, too bad. Oh, fortune of war. Yes, fortune of war. Odd how it

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happens, isn't it? Sit down, Smalley. Millicent, console Captain Smalley with your best light

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conversation. You two mother. George and I have something to look at outside. There's this

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rain, you know, very bad, very bad. Come, George. Right, old Governor. Maybe we'll need raincoats,

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what? Oh, I don't think so. Just make yourself at home, Smalley. Make yourself at home.

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A cigarette, Captain Smalley? Thank you. Thank you. Nasty day to be going out.

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Something about the old well. Just off the Sunforged Door, you know. This terrible

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sudden weather seems to have loosened some of the stones. Oh, too bad. Dash too bad. Spoils the

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tennis and croquet, I mean, a day like this, doesn't it, Millie? Doesn't it, Millie? Oh,

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yes, it does. She was practicing out on the croquet court earlier, but, oh, do pull your

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chair nearer the fire, Captain. It was so damp, we thought it would be cozy to light it. Thank

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you. I'm quite comfortable. I hope you don't feel too bad about Anna Davis. Can't always win.

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Can't see, though, what you women see in these bloodless clerics. Oh, I always thought Mr.

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Witherswaas is a very charming man. Quite agree, but why should anyone want to marry him? You

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wouldn't want to marry him, would you, Millie? Not now. Very right. Are you? Oh, oh, no.

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Of course not. Smalley. Yes, yes, Prince Hymn. Good Lord, Manu, to come in all of a sudden.

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Yes, I did. Oh, don't mind this old double-barreled shotgun. Been working on it. Smalley,

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may I have your attention for a minute? There's something on the sun porch I'd like to show you.

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Why, yes, yes, of course. Smalley, George and I went out to see if we could shoot some rats which

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have been driven out of the old well by the high water. Afraid they might get into the house. Now,

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you must listen to me very carefully. Very carefully, or you will be shot by accident. Princey,

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what's got into you? You heard me ask as you came in who would kill Withers. You also heard

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Millicent make a comment, an unguarded comment. Well, what of it? Very little. Unless you were

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to hear that Withers had met a violent end this very afternoon. And that, my dear Smalley, is what

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you are going to hear. What? Withers? Yes. Who killed him? Millicent. Good Lord. Yes, it's a mess.

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And of course you would have remembered and guessed. Maybe, yes, yes, I suppose I should.

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Therefore you constitute a problem. Why did she kill him? Oh, it's one of those disgusting things.

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Pityable too. She deluded herself that he was in love with her. Good heavens, Millie. Oh, yes,

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of course. I see. He had told her about the Davis girl. I understand. Now, I have no wishes. You

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will comprehend. She should be proved either a lunatic or a murderous. I could hardly go on

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living here after that. I suppose not. On the other hand, you know about it. Yes, I see that.

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Makes me a problem. You're wondering if I could keep my mouth shut if I promise. I am wondering

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if I could believe you. But if I promise. If things went smoothly, yes, but not if there was any sort

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of suspicion, any questioning. You would be afraid of being an accessory. Why, I don't know. I do.

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What are we going to do? I can't see anything else. You'd never be a fool enough to do me,

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Ian. You can't get rid of two corpses. Oh, I regard it as a better risk than the other. It could be an

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accident. Or you and Withers could both disappear. There are possibilities in that. Listen, you can't.

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I can, but there may be a way out. There is. Smollett, you gave it to me yourself. I did what?

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You said you would kill Withers. You have a motive. Look here, I was joking. Of course you saw that.

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You are always joking. Listen, Smollett, I can't trust you. You must trust me. Else I will kill you

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now in the next minute. I mean that. You can choose between dying and living. Go on. Now,

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there's the old way just outside the Sunport store. That's where I'm going to put Withers. No one

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outside knows he has come up here this afternoon. No one will ever look there for him unless you

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tell them. You must give me evidence that you have murdered Withers. I murdered him? Why do you want

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that? So that I shall be dead sure that you will never open your lips on the subject. I see. What

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evidence? George, hit him in the face. Sure. George, don't. Keep out of this. Captain, you should be more

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careful. Look what your teeth did to my knuckles. Again, George. Okay. I can't stand it. Keep quiet.

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You women keep out of this. I'm sorry, Smollett, but there must be traces of a struggle between you

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and Withers. Then it will not be altogether safe for you to go to the police. But can't you take my

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word, man? I will when we are finished. George, get the croquet merit. Right, Governor. Take your

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handkerchief to it in there on the Sunport floor. Yes. Yes, I got it, Governor. There, Captain.

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There's the weapon. As I told you, Smollett, now you just grasp the end that mashed Withers' head.

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I shall shoot you if you don't. But good Lord, you can't. All right. There. That's it. Now deposit it

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out by the side of the house, out of the rain, of course. No. Wait, George. First, you'd better pull

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a few hairs out of his head and put them under the nails of Withers' right hand. Princey, have you

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gone mad? Do you know what you're doing? With this gun? Yes. Go ahead, George. Sorry to mush your

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hair up, Captain. Shut up, Smollett. There. That's all we need. Now for Withers, and we'll fix it right up.

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Be right with you, Governor. Smollett, you may turn around. Withers is just there in the Sunport.

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Draw back the curtain. Good Lord, Princey. Yes. Messy. But we'll get him fixed up. Now you, Smollett,

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you've just got to drag him through the door and dump him in the old well. Just beyond the door,

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Captain. I won't touch him. I won't. All right. Stand aside. Out of range, George. Right. Only one

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place I want this bullet to go. Father. Father. Keep quiet. My aim's not too good. Wait a minute.

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Wait a minute. That's better, Smollett. Much better. Go on now. In here. You'll have to take him

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outside. By the shoulders ought to do it, Captain. Keep quiet, George. Go on, Smollett. Go on. You've

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seen dead men before. Drag him. Drag him. I'll just hold the gun here to make sure that everything

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goes all right. Oh, Mother. Come away from the din, Wendoldia. Don't look. But Captain Smollett,

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your father is a very resourceful man, Millicent. I'm sure what he's doing is right. But the Captain,

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I can't, I can't stand it. You mustn't question your dear father. I say, are you two still at it?

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There's enough trouble around here without blubbering. I'm not blubbering, George. So you see, Smollett,

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everything is perfect. They never look in our well. You see how safe it is? I guess it is. Oh,

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good heavens, man. You're dripping wet. Why didn't you slip your raincoat on? Tea ready, my dear?

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In just a minute, dear. I'll bring for Bridget. Exactly what you need, Smollett. Cup of tea. Best

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thing in the world to ward off a cold. Sit down, won't you? Don't mind getting the chair wet.

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Cigarette? Help yourself. I stick to my pipe, you know. Funny how... Everything is hot,

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man. Oh, Bridget, yes. Put the tray in front of me here, on the table. That's it. I say,

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Captain, you've gone and cut your lip. I just knocked it. Oh, how dreadful. Here, Bridget,

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sit for Captain this cup. No, no, thank you. I rather think I'll be running along now,

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if you don't mind. Why, Captain Smollett, without any tea? If you don't mind, Mrs. Princey,

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if I could just have my raincoat. I'll get it for you, Captain. Oh, this is very distressing,

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Smollett, very. I'll be all right presently, I'm sure. Here we are now. Let me help you.

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Thank you. Thank you, young man. There. I'd better go out the front way, Smollett. The walk is dry.

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Oh, let me hold the door for you, Captain. Don't worry, old fellow. Don't worry at all.

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Oh, no, no, I... Good afternoon. Nothing serious, I imagine. He'll rest and he'll be as right as rain.

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By the way, Millicent, you're not looking any too well. No, not well at all. I'm sure it was

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that croaky court. Being outdoors in weather like this is simply foolhardy. The maid is right,

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Millie. You saw what happened to Captain Smollett. Come along, dear. I shall give you a hot foot bath

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and put you to bed. And a couple of days in bed and you'll be fine again. Get plenty of rest,

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Millicent, and don't worry about a thing. That's the best cure. Well, I guess I'll have a little rest,

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too, Governor. It's a fine afternoon for a nap. Indeed it is, son. Well, enjoy yourself. I'll see

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you later. I'll see you all later. Your number, please. Oh, would you get me the police station,

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please? Police station? Right away, sir. Police headquarters, Sergeant Yancy speaking. Oh, hello,

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Sergeant. This is Princey of Abbots Road. I believe you know me. Oh, indeed I do, Mr. Princey.

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Sergeant, a horrible thing has just happened. Quite extraordinary. Murder, in fact. Murder? I'm

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afraid it looks rather bad for, well, for a close friend of ours, unfortunately. We saw him do it.

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I think you'd better send someone over right away. Our man should be there right about now,

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Mr. Princey. I beg your pardon? I say, our man should be there now. Constable Martin has his post

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right below your house there. Just rang in. Seems Captain Smollett was with him. Captain Smollett?

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He reported some rather queer goings-on at your place, but I certainly didn't understand it was

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murder. Just don't touch anything, Mr. Princey, and don't worry. Don't worry at all. No. No,

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no, no. I won't, Sergeant. Thank you. Governor! Governor, where are you? I'm right here. Stop

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shouting. We, we have some visitors, Governor. Oh, yes. Yes, yes, I can see that. Well, Constable,

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good afternoon. Good afternoon, Mr. Princey. And Smollett, I see what a remarkable fellow you are,

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coming back like this. Here to reenact the crime? Only the one against me, Princey. The one against

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the curate. I'll leave to you people. Extraordinary sense of humor. Mr. Princey, I just had to look

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at what's in your well. Not to criticize that, not pretty at all. Yes, Captain Smollett was

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thorough, if nothing else. You saw him when he did it, sir, out in the back? Oh, quite. We were just

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returning from a walk. Smollett evidently had been laying for the curate, hiding out in those

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bushes by the road, I imagine. He was never inside this house? Never. And you say, Captain? I say

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that while I was inside this house, a guest of the family, I was coerced into dragging the curate's

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body outside and dumping it in the well. Well, there we are. Not entirely, Constable. I'll just

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remove my raincoat, there, and demonstrate how damp I got my clothes when I went outside without it.

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No, that's interesting, isn't it? Quite. He undoubtedly removed his coat at some point between

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here and your post. I might as well tell you that his weapon, a red croquemallet, is out by the side

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of the house. I shouldn't be at all surprised but that you'd find his fingerprints all over it. All

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over the end of the mallet, Constable, the end that mashed Withers's head, and not the end I'd

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have had to grasp in order to do the mashing. Governor, that's a decent try, Smollett, but it

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won't work. There must be other evidences, Constable. You'll undoubtedly find them when you examine the

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body. He means my hair under Withers's nails. Well, sir, if you look carefully, I believe you'll find

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a few of my precious hairs under his son's nails, too. Here, what are you trying at? Constable,

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this is an utter waste of time. So far as the violence struggle between Smollett and Withers is

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concerned, Smollett's face speaks for itself, quite eloquently, I believe. Oh, but no more eloquently

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than your son's knuckles. As you see, Constable, a fresh abrasion. He did that on my teeth. Or did

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he? What? I say, or did he? He might have done that on Withers's teeth. Oh, I see. I see what you mean.

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But, but, but I didn't. Governor, he said I... Oh, keep still, you nitwit. Let me think. Let me think.

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As a matter of fact, George, the more I think of it, the more I'm convinced it was your voice I

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heard. Quite a vigorous quarrel. Something about the curate juking your sister. Oh, don't be ridiculous,

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Smollett. Very well, Princey. If your son didn't do it, who did? That's what I'd like to know. How

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about it, Mr. Princey? Well, that, that is a sticker, all right. George, my boy, it looks like you're

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elected. Elected? What do you mean? I didn't do it. Why, I don't... Keep your mouth shut, will you? I won't.

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I'm not going to take the blame for her. Millie did it. She did it with that mallet, I saw. You could

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prove that? Prove it? I, I... Yes, her, her fingerprints on the mallet, the handle. Why, George, don't you

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remember when you made me touch the mallet, when you picked it up with your handkerchief? No, I...

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George, I'm sure you wiped that handle clean. Oh, well, I could hardly expect you to remember that,

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if you, if you can't even remember killing the curate. Governor, I... I told you to keep still.

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But Governor, you're not going to turn me over, you... As long as I can remember, George, you've been a

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trial and a tribulation to me. Governor, I... You shouldn't have done it, son. You really shouldn't.

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No, George, that was definitely wrong. I say, Princey, I think I'll have that cup of tea after all.

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Nothing like it in weather like this. Wet Saturday, from the short story by John Collier. You have

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just heard the second in Columbia's new series, a series designed to bring you the best in thrill

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entertainment. Outstanding dramas from the field of fiction and radio, stage and screen. Dramas of

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pure suspense. This Columbia feature is produced and directed by Charles Vanda, with script by

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Harold Bedford and score by Bernard Herman. Be with us again next week at the same time when we

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present Suspense. This is the Columbia Broadcasting System.

